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    • I want to get a divorce, but I can’t decide. What to do if you can’t wait for changes in your relationship and want to divorce your husband What to do if you want to get a divorce

    12.01.2024

    Hello, dear ladies! How to understand that a relationship has come to an end? Sometimes this can be very difficult to do. A habit sets in, it’s a pity to leave because of the long years spent together, children, common property. There are a million factors because of which women are afraid and are in no hurry to leave the family, although it is completely clear that there is nothing left to save. Let's try to answer the question together: when should you divorce your husband?

    Eternal love

    I always start analyzing relationships with the question: have you done everything to ensure that your love lives forever? You can save a marriage indefinitely if you are ready for this work.

    Many couples experience infidelity, difficult financial situations, opposition from parents and other troubles and difficulties. It all depends on whether the right person is next to you.

    I know a couple who have been together for over ten years. They have been through so many difficult situations that I can’t even count. But they are still together, holding hands more and more tightly and moving forward. They love each other, they are ready to do anything for each other. This is a story from a fairy tale that suddenly burst into life.

    There are other examples. When couples could not withstand even the slightest obstacles. It all depends on you and your partner. Make sure of this by reading the article "". In it I describe in detail the features of working on relationships.

    But fate does not always bring us together with the one and only. For fear of being left alone, young ladies cling to this man as their last chance. But in the end this will not lead to anything good. Without love, without support, without and trust relationships will not last long.

    Do you feel that your feelings have cooled down and don’t know what to do? Check out the article " ».

    Basic excuses for divorce

    Each couple is special and faces its own unique problems, but in general, the reasons for divorce always find similarities. Let's discuss the most common ones and try to understand whether it is possible to save the family or whether it is worth packing your suitcase and leaving.

    Alcohol. One of the most common reasons why women leave men. And in my opinion, there is nothing here that can be tolerated. An alcoholic in the family is a real misfortune. Of course, there are different alcoholics, quiet and calm ones, who get drunk and go to sleep. But there are aggressive ones who beat their family.

    It is almost impossible to treat a man at home. This should be done by specialists. If you managed to talk with your spouse, he realized that he has problems and is ready for treatment, then you can still talk about saving the marriage. But if he refuses to accept his problems, does not understand what your complaint is, everything suits him, then it will be useless to fight him.

    Quite often I meet couples in which the husband and wife are drawn together into this completely unexciting journey. Think about yourself, about your health. Sometimes it all starts simply with a couple of bottles of beer in the evening after work. But before you notice, it’s already a permanent bottle of cognac, hidden in the closet. Be carefull. I'm not advocating not drinking at all. It is important to have a common sense, to be able to stop.

    Money. Another common reason for divorce. Poor living conditions, unwillingness of the spouse to work. But here it is very important to understand in what situations you need to help your spouse cope with the current circumstances, and when it is really time to leave.

    If your husband has just been laid off from a good position, give him some time to recover. Help him look for a job, don’t nag him again. Now he needs support. But if he has been sitting for a year, two or three and is still trying to find a job, then let doubts creep into your head. Is he really looking for her?

    I bring to your attention the article "". In it, I examine in detail the various options why men prefer to stay at home and how to deal with it.

    But if this happens with enviable regularity, I’m afraid you won’t be able to do anything with such a man. After all, some even start a second family. There is no test that would help initially determine whether your spouse will run to the left or not. You will understand this only after living with him for several years.

    How to understand that a man is cheating? Signs may vary. He stays late at work, hides his phone, and leaves the room when he gets a call. Just don't panic ahead of time. Sometimes women see something that really isn't there. There is no need to make a scandal if you are not sure about treason.

    Different tempers. This may include different goals in life, lifestyle, plans and dreams, incompatibility in bed, the desire to have a child, and so on. At the beginning of a relationship, euphoria closes our eyes and we do not see strong differences that can later interfere with the relationship.

    What is family? These are two people who together strive for common happiness. And when you have different understandings of happiness, you cannot go towards it together.

    Recently, one of my clients separated from a man. The reason was their different desires. He wanted to come home after work, have dinner, watch a movie and relax. She now needs activity, going to exhibitions, movies, traveling to different cities in our country.

    You can find useful tips on this topic in the article "".

    Other reasons. In addition to the above-described excuses for divorce, you can find frequent quarrels, loss of feelings, parents who constantly interfere in the relationship, illness, frequent separations of partners, and so on.

    What to do?

    Whether it's worth fighting for love is up to you to decide! If you feel strong, feel the support of your husband, see his willingness to resist obstacles, then you will definitely succeed.

    Give yourself a break. Try to separate for a while. Think, analyze your relationship, what else you are ready to do, what you will lose if you separate, what you will lose if you stay together. Evaluate all options.

    Don't draw hasty conclusions or make hasty decisions. Sometimes it’s very easy to destroy everything, but then it’s impossible to put it back together.

    When is it necessary to leave a man? Have you ever forgiven betrayal? Are you more often the initiator of the breakup or the partner?

    Take your time and think it through carefully. I am sure you will definitely find the right solution!

    Marriage is challenging for both partners. Today, according to disappointing statistics, 829 couples out of 1000 get divorced. And the reason is not always the banal phrase “they don’t get along.” Often these are more serious reasons, including domestic violence and alcoholism or drug addiction of a spouse. It is difficult for any woman to decide on a divorce for many reasons, for example, because of children or material and moral dependence on a partner. In such a difficult situation, it is difficult to cope without the support and advice of psychologists.

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    Serious signs indicating the need to end a relationship

    “All happy families are alike, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way,” wrote the great classic. After the honeymoon, the process of partners getting used to each other begins. During this period, it seems that a loved one is not at all as ideal as before the stamp in the passport. His shortcomings and bad habits come to light, which are sometimes very difficult to put up with. It is then that the first doubts arise about the prospects of further relations.

    Banal everyday quarrels, even if they occur periodically, are not a reason for divorce. In any union there are crises and temporary difficulties. There are also more serious reasons that should be regarded as a signal to break off the relationship. Among them are:

    • Treason. According to statistics, one of the most common reasons for divorce is adultery. It should be regarded as disrespect not only for your partner, but also for your choice. And if there is no respect in the family, then there is no talk of love. The injured party begins to doubt itself, withdraws, and loses trust in the other half, and this is an important component of a harmonious relationship. When this phenomenon becomes systematic, it is worth thinking about breaking up.
    • Problems in the intimate sphere. This side of family relationships is not the most important. But constant dissatisfaction of one of the spouses or both turns into resentment and irritation, which sooner or later leads to relationships on the side.
    • Assault. If a husband allows himself to raise his hand against his wife, then there is no need to talk about any feelings. Staying with such a man is dangerous, because one random blow can be followed by a series of daily beatings. If you believe crime reports, most murders occur precisely because of domestic conflicts. If your husband beats you, there is only one conclusion - it’s time to get a divorce.
    • Moral violence. In addition to physical violence, there is also moral violence in the family. If a spouse constantly humiliates, insults, and bullies, then over time the woman turns into a hunted victim, full of complexes. All this leads to severe nervous disorders and mental disorders. Divorce from a tyrant husband should not be postponed until constant tension develops into serious physical illness.
    • Alcoholism or drug addiction are serious illnesses that even a very good wife cannot solve on her own. If your husband is an alcoholic or drug addict, you should not blame yourself for his choice and take responsibility for the actions of a stranger. If everything possible was done to preserve the relationship, but there was no result, then there is only one way out - divorce.
    • Life for the sake of children. Children need to grow up in a complete family, where both parents are actively involved in their lives. If conflicts and quarrels often arise in family relationships, and all this happens in front of the baby’s eyes, then it is quite possible that he will be much more comfortable after mom and dad separate. In an effort to mend broken relationships in which there is no longer love and mutual understanding, spouses, unknowingly, plant in the child’s mind the wrong model of behavior in his future family.
    • Mutual dissatisfaction. Perhaps both spouses have an aversion to certain habits of their other half. In this case, over time, irritation will only increase, and sooner or later this will lead to the collapse of the union.
    • Termination of communication between spouses and lack of common interests. For a harmonious relationship, it is important to have not only mutual feelings, but also common interests and topics for conversation. Otherwise, the marriage will become insipid and both partners will quickly get bored. If a man does not pay enough attention to his companion, the woman withdraws into herself, becomes immersed in personal experiences and stops discussing pressing problems with her partner. As a result, accumulated grievances lead to a decision to divorce.
    • Uneven distribution of responsibilities and the reluctance of men to provide for the family. If caring for children, financial problems, and housekeeping are the responsibility of the woman alone, then such a relationship will not last long. Marriage is, in a certain sense, a collaboration, and all duties and responsibilities that arise in the process of living together should be distributed evenly.

    No matter how serious the reasons that made a woman think about ending her relationship with her husband, the decision to divorce should not be made rashly. It is necessary to assess the situation from all sides and only then act.

    In most cases, ladies try to mend the broken cup of a relationship, delaying the inevitable end of the marriage until the last moment. Advice from psychologists will help you overcome fears and doubts. First, you need to decide why you don’t want to end the relationship, then understand yourself, and only after that make a final decision. Experts identify the following reasons why women are afraid of divorce:

    • The belief that the partner will change. The infantile views of some women that any person can be changed over time sometimes lead to the continuation of a marriage that has actually ended, which does not break up despite all the logical arguments in favor of its dissolution. People do not change and do not have to be what people want them to be. Vain attempts to adjust to your soul mate usually lead to mutual irritation, resentment and ultimately to divorce. You need to either accept your partner as he is, or, if coexistence makes the woman unhappy, leave.
    • Fear of being alone. The fear of loneliness is experienced by women with low self-esteem, who have not succeeded in life and are not self-sufficient. They are ready to endure for many years an unsuccessful union with a complete stranger just because, in their opinion, no one else needs them. In this situation, psychologists advise to love yourself, gain autonomy and independence. After a divorce, you will have to be alone with yourself for some time. This period should be considered a kind of pause, when you can calmly think about yourself, your future life, put your thoughts and appearance in order. Imperceptibly, the situation will begin to change for the better, loneliness will no longer be as burdensome as before, confidence and determination will appear in the eyes, which will attract a large number of new fans.
    • Financial insolvency or unstable living situation. It is difficult to decide on separation in a situation where a woman does not have a job or financial means for an independent existence. In this case, you should think about your desires, understand what you really want to get from life, and act in accordance with a clearly constructed action plan. For example, get an education, find a promising job, enlist the support of loved ones for the first time. It is important to remember that there are no hopeless situations.
    • Reluctance to leave children without a father and take full responsibility for their upbringing and maintenance. If there is a child or two or more children in the family, it is quite difficult to think about divorcing even the worst husband. On the one hand, the entire burden of obligations to the offspring and all the difficulties associated with their development and material support will fall on the woman’s shoulders, on the other hand, it is very difficult to deprive a child of his father’s participation. Divorce of parents is a serious psychological trauma for any child. But life in a family where there is a difficult moral situation with an alcoholic or a tyrant father is even worse. In such a situation, it is necessary to think about the interests of the children; this will help you make the right decision about breaking off relations with your spouse.
    • The power of habit. The difficulty is that it is difficult to part with a person with whom you have lived for many years, shared joys, hardships and bed. Sometimes addiction takes on such a character that a woman is ready to forgive absolutely everything and make concessions where it is worth saying a firm “no”. In this case, experts advise not to be afraid to make a radical decision about separation, not to consider your spouse as property and to let him go, maintaining a good relationship with him. This will make the divorce less painful.
    • Fear of condemnation from relatives and mutual friends. Any couple who has lived together for quite a long time develops a certain social circle. Fear of other people's opinions often forces people who have cooled off towards each other to continue to be married for fear of condemnation. Here it is worth considering that you need to live for yourself, and not for others, and build a life at your own discretion.

    You shouldn't be afraid of divorce. The end of an old relationship is always the beginning of a new stage, a step towards emotional liberation, a full, calm and healthy life.

    A couple of days ago, a distant relative called me and told me about the difficult situation in her family. The first thing I heard on the phone was: “I want to divorce my husband! Where to start so that everything goes quickly and without hassle? Of course, I tried to dissuade her from this step, since they had been together for about five years, but after learning the details, I realized that my arguments were useless at the moment.

    We decided immediately on the authority through which the divorce process would be carried out, because they have material assets that are subject to division, and they are also raising two minor children. There were no problems with the list of documents either, but just in case, I told her to visit the local city court in order to clarify some of the nuances.

    Finally, I once again recommended that they think about the situation without unnecessary emotions, reminding them that it will be difficult for children to adapt to new living conditions. Now I’m waiting for a call and hoping that everything will work out. Well, if she doesn’t change her mind, then we will prepare for a meeting at which we will have to defend the property and the kids.

    Anyone who has had a chance to get a divorce at random, without serious legal preparation, has regretted it many times. Years later, one comes to understand how many mistakes were made as a result of a frivolous approach to such an important procedure as divorce.

    After all, ignorance of the laws very often leads to prolongation of such a painful process and, accordingly, causes unnecessary pain to unfortunate divorcees. Fortunately, most mistakes made do not lead to irreparable consequences.

    Nevertheless, often due to mistakes made during a divorce, many years later it is necessary to begin again to bring this matter to an end. Naturally, this is not a pleasant task, so it is better to file a divorce according to all the rules from the very beginning.
    After all, you want to be sure that you once and for all break all legal ties connecting you with the person who has become unloved, and after that you can start life from scratch.

    This article contains the collective experience of many separated couples, which, coupled with the most up-to-date knowledge of the legal side of the issue, will help you avoid the mistakes they made and carry out your divorce process in the most painless and fastest way. You will learn how to properly end relationships that have become obsolete.

    The information and advice collected are very relevant for the residents of our country, because few young Russians even know such basic things as how and where to start a divorce. Mostly, this information is available to people who have already been divorced and have learned this lesson the hard way.

    How to start a divorce

    Where should you start with a divorce? This question is answered by two whole chapters of the Family Code of the Russian Federation. The articles they contain are equal in volume to five percent of the total text of the code.

    Naturally, this article will not provide a complete reproduction of the information contained in the code regarding divorce. The purpose of this article is to give the reader a general understanding of the issue and to warn him against the dangers that threaten him along the divorce path. If you need more detailed information that reveals certain nuances, you can always refer to the text of the Civil Code, or, best of all, go for a consultation with a specialized specialist.

    A very interesting question is why almost every second marriage breaks up in Russia. Many reasons have been identified that incline couples to divorce:

    • the need to divide property with a wife or husband;
    • other everyday and material problems;
    • betrayal of a marriage partner, suspicion of her, a pronounced feeling of jealousy;
    • constant quarrels and the impossibility of peaceful coexistence within marriage;
    • the unimaginable routine of the daily life of the spouses, cool relationships;
    • the appearance of a mistress or a new family for one of the spouses;
    • the disappearance of the feeling of love that previously held the marriage together in one or both spouses;
    • infertility of one of the spouses;
    • manifestation of violence in family life.

    Divorce through the registry office

    If one of the spouses is not satisfied with continuing to be married, he has the right to apply for dissolution of this legal status that binds him to another person. Statements often come from both sides simultaneously. If at least one spouse has submitted such an application, the divorce procedure begins. It can be carried out both through the court and through the registry office employees.

    The second method is called administrative; it is more practical and quicker to execute, but its advantages have their roots in its own disadvantages. This procedure is not suitable for all couples in order for them to take advantage of it: they need to meet a number of criteria:

    1. No minor children.
    2. Mutual consent of the spouses.

    In order to indicate their consent to divorce, the spouses submit a jointly written statement. This document does not necessarily have to be created with the participation of both spouses, however, both of them are required to confirm their agreement with its contents with their signatures. The autograph of the spouse who did not write the application must be notarized.
    The following documents are required to be submitted along with the application:

    1. Passports.
    2. Marriage certificate.
    3. Receipts for payment of state fees.

    A month later, after submitting the application and other necessary documents, you will be able to pick up a divorce certificate from the registry office. Before it is issued to you, both spouses will be asked to confirm their intention to divorce. If they have not changed their minds, they will not only be given a certificate, but will also have a divorce stamp stamped in their passports.

    It is worth noting separately that divorce through the registry office does not solve all the problems that are likely to arise during the dissolution of a marriage.
    Thus, the registry office does not deal with the division of property, so if the couple did not have a concluded marriage contract and they were unable to reach a mutual agreement, then this issue will have to be resolved in court.

    Nevertheless, the marriage is considered dissolved after the corresponding stamp is placed in the spouses’ passports, and they themselves sign that they have taken away the divorce certificates.

    Divorce through the court occurs in cases that are not suitable for carrying out this procedure through the registry office. It is not always possible to get a divorce even through the court: for example, if there is a common child under the age of one year, the couple cannot be divorced without the consent of the child’s mother.

    Divorce by court decision

    If one of the spouses does not want to get a divorce, then, with rare exceptions, such as the case described in the previous paragraph, the marriage will still be dissolved quite quickly through the court. A spouse who does not want to divorce can only delay the inevitable decision by not appearing at court hearings, but starting from the third, the court has the right to terminate the marriage without the presence of the spouse.

    More complicated cases of divorce occur when there are children.
    First of all, there will probably be a dispute about who will take care of the children, or more precisely, with whom they will live. In principle, it is possible to get a divorce without resolving this issue through the court. However, without an appropriate agreement, this, as well as related issues regarding the division of property and alimony payments, will inevitably arise in the future and will naturally lead to litigation. Therefore, it is better to resolve these issues through the court at the stage of divorce, because starting the court hearing again will result in an additional loss of time, effort and nerves.
    But the best solution is to have a conversation about the division of responsibilities and property before the divorce process begins. What you should not do in any case is to unnecessarily delay court proceedings - it is better to try to resolve all issues within one process.

    Payment of state fees for divorce

    In order to get a divorce, both spouses are required to pay a state fee of 400 rubles. However, if something prevents one of the spouses from paying it, or he is sentenced to a term exceeding three years, or is declared incompetent, then such spouse is released from this obligation, which cannot be said about the other half. The second spouse pays a state fee of 200 rubles.

    Source: http://molodsemja.ru

    How to divorce your husband?

    Nowadays, strong family ties have become devalued, so one marriage out of three ends in breakup or, as they call it, divorce. Back in the twentieth century, in order to dissolve a marriage, it was necessary either to prove with facts the infidelity of one of the parties, or to go to a monastery - this was considered a good reason.

    In the modern world, this process has been greatly simplified, and now only desire is enough for divorce proceedings. Not all couples manage to do everything right, without scandal, so as not to harm the child’s psyche. And there are also some cases when the registry office cannot resolve the issue, then the matter comes to court.

    To start the divorce process correctly, you need to know the nuances that will affect your personal situation.
    The Internet contains many samples of various documents that were used in divorces. After reviewing these documents, you will be “savvy” in this area.

    If you do not obtain the consent of your spouse, and the issue will most likely be resolved through the court, then it is advisable to contact a lawyer who specializes in divorce cases; the registry office will not help you resolve these issues.

    If the marriage was officially registered in the registry office, then it must also be officially dissolved. To get a divorce, you only need the desire of one side.
    You need to obtain a document on the basis of which you can assume that the marriage has ended.

    And also the marriage automatically ends if the spouse dies. There are situations when a marriage is declared invalid.

    How to get a divorce quickly?

    If both parties want to dissolve the marriage, and there are no children, then this process will be quick and will not cause inconvenience to either spouse. If the spouse’s desire is one-sided, divorce is also inevitable, but the second, non-agreeing half can make the official divorce drag on. It will still not be possible to get a divorce before one month - this is in accordance with the law.

    You will have to wait a year if your wife is pregnant. If both people agree to divorce without quarrels or misunderstandings, then the divorce process proceeds according to the general procedure. Even if the child died after childbirth or something happened to him in the last stage of pregnancy and he was born dead, and the spouse does not agree to the divorce, you still need to wait this year to file an application with the court.

    If there are minor children, and a scandal cannot be avoided, you still need to go to court through the registry office to obtain a certificate that the marriage has been legally dissolved.

    Before a month, even with the consent of each spouse, the divorce is not recognized as legal. If you have a child, when the parents have mutually decided who will raise him, you can also get a divorce in a month at the registry office, although they offer three months for reconciliation, which the spouses often refuse.

    How to divorce your husband when both agree

    The procedure for filing a divorce through the registry office is much easier than going to court, and there is no need, because you can calmly submit your applications and come back for a divorce in a month (requires the presence of both parties).

    If the spouse does not have the opportunity to come to the registry office, but he agrees to divorce, then it is necessary to obtain a consent to divorce from a notary.
    If the husband, for example, is abroad, but has given his consent, he can issue a power of attorney to a lawyer who will be responsible for him.

    If the spouse is under investigation in a pre-trial detention center, or is serving a sentence in prison, the application is certified by the chief.

    You can get a divorce through the registry office, even if there are children, if one of the parties:

    • declared legally incompetent;
    • went missing;
    • the person was sentenced to a term of more than three years.

    What documents need to be collected if both spouses want to divorce:

    • an application to be filled out by the wife and husband;
    • original and copies of passports and documents confirming marriage;
    • a document from the bank confirming that you have paid the fee.

    How to divorce your husband with unilateral consent through the court?

    If there is no consent of the spouse (evasion to appear at the registry office), there are children under the age of eighteen, or property, it is necessary to divorce in court.

    In the case where there is no mutual agreement, it is necessary to start the divorce process correctly: collect all the necessary documents, hire a good lawyer. Disputes can be different: division of property, about raising a child, about alimony, spousal support, etc. Such issues are decided by the magistrate.

    About the procedure for filing a divorce through the court:

    1. After submitting the application, you must wait for the response to arrive, which will indicate the time and place of the hearing. This answer will come within two weeks. If he doesn't come, you can call the court and find out the reason. The meeting is scheduled one month after submitting the application.
    2. The defendant may admit the claim or file an objection to the claim.
    3. At the first court hearing, the judge finds out whether the application was drawn up with unilateral consent, or whether one person is against divorce.
    4. In any case, you will be given three months to try it on.
    5. The plaintiff did not give up his demands - after three months, the marriage will be dissolved.
    6. The divorce is recognized as legal only after one month has passed.

    How to get a divorce if you have a child

    Some women are afraid of divorce and say: “I want to divorce my husband, but I’m worried that he will take my child away from me through the courts.”

    Yes, such cases happen, but the magistrate approaches each situation individually. It is clear here that the issue cannot be resolved through the registry office.

    It is necessary to begin this proceeding with the understanding that both husband and wife have the same rights to the child.

    Many people think that it is normal for a child to stay with his mother just because she gave birth to him. There is also a rather stereotypical opinion that if the father has a stable, and even more than stable, financial situation, then the child will go to him, and vice versa, if the mother has a lot of money, the child will be hers. The court requires the mandatory presence of the child (after the age of three) in order to take into account his wishes.

    What may be taken into account in court when finding out about a child:

    1. You need to start by finding out who the child wants to stay with, which the parents may not even know before the trial.
    2. The opinion of parents is also taken into account. Often the father refuses to raise the child in favor of the mother. If no agreement is reached, the court schedules another hearing.
    3. What follows is a long process of litigation.

    In court, when parents cannot reach an agreement on who will raise the child (often happens with unilateral disagreement on divorce), a person is appointed from the guardianship and trusteeship authority, who will have to examine the living conditions of each spouse.

    You can make a good impression on the guardianship authorities if the housing meets the standards for a child’s residence. If the conditions do not satisfy the representative of the guardianship and trusteeship authorities, then he may give his preference to the other party.

    Lawyers can advise on exactly what living conditions are needed for a full-fledged upbringing of children and how to approach this issue correctly.

    If a woman has a job, suitable conditions, and does not have any serious illnesses, then, most likely, the child will remain with her, since the guardianship and trusteeship authorities are confident that the child is still better off with his mother.

    But there are no guarantees that the child will be left with the mother, which is why an experienced lawyer is needed who will support when the issue of children is resolved in court.

    Does the age of the child affect the divorce process?

    What to expect when your husband contacts the registry office if you have a child who is, for example, four months old and does not receive consent for divorce? The registry office will not be able to help, as written above, and the court will not even accept the document to file a claim. But as soon as the child becomes one year old, the husband has the opportunity to divorce without his wife’s consent, but not in the registry office, but in court (if questions arise about upbringing).

    With a child under three years old there are also some nuances. Since the mother has the right to take parental leave, that is, she will be unable to work at this time, all expenses for her and the child will have to be allocated to the spouse, which he is unlikely to want with his unilateral consent (without the consent of the wife).

    Divorce proceedings with more than one child are no different from divorce with one child.
    Except that with alimony payments it’s a little different.

    How to get a divorce if your husband is serving a sentence in prison

    If the wife has achieved consent, then an application for divorce must be submitted to the registry office. The presence of the husband is not even necessary; the head of the institution can sign the document for the prisoner. A month after filing the application, the marriage can be dissolved.

    The husband's consent can be dispensed with if he serves a sentence in prison for more than three years.
    Then his presence is also not necessary.

    If a man who is in prison has common acquired property and common children with his wife, then the court will decide the issues. The process of dividing property and children cannot infringe on the rights of a person who is in prison.

    What to expect from a divorce from a foreigner?

    It is possible to divorce a foreigner (in some cases in court) without his presence, but at the same time contacting either the foreigner himself or the judicial authorities of the state of which he is a citizen (more often with the unilateral consent of only the wife to divorce). It doesn’t matter whether the husband is in prison, or he simply doesn’t want to cross the border again, the divorce will be carried out in accordance with the legislation of the Russian Federation.

    What difficulties may arise when divorcing a foreigner:

    1. To submit an application for divorce to the registry office, you must have your husband’s notarized consent with you. Without his presence and in the absence of this document (with unilateral consent), it is recommended to go to court.
    2. There may be problems with the location of the trial.
    3. Accordingly, the process of divorcing a foreigner without his presence will be delayed due to these factors.

    A marriage with a foreigner is automatically annulled if:

    • declaring him dead;
    • recognition of his incapacity.

    It is possible to divorce a foreigner both on the territory of the Russian Federation and on the territory of another state, which it is advisable not to do if you have not fully studied the laws on divorce, which are prescribed in their legislation.

    For example, Germany, where, by agreement of both parties, a foreigner is divorced only a year after the spouses began to live separately, and with unilateral consent, this period increases to three years.

    With mutual consent, without the presence of a foreign husband and in the absence of children, the following documents are needed:

    • notarized consent to divorce signed by a foreigner;
    • spouse's passport, notarized copy of husband's passport;
    • marriage certificate.

    Registration of divorce from a foreign citizen in court

    Spouses go to court in the following cases:

    • disagreement with the divorce of one of the parties;
    • property disputes;
    • the presence of common children who have not yet reached eighteen years of age.
    There is also a so-called arbitrator.
    This is the person you can contact if the foreign husband has not provided written consent to the divorce, and the trial will take place without his presence.

    They also turn to the arbitrator in cases where the marriage was dissolved on the territory of a foreign state. The wife provides a notarized copy of the relevant document, after which an independent arbitrator issues a verdict.

    There is another option - to send a claim to the location of the foreigner’s property.
    In this case, indicate that you are not informed about where your husband lives. Accordingly, this uncertainty makes it difficult to go to see your spouse.

    In this case, the defendant must be notified. Our courts often shift this responsibility to the courts of a foreign country.

    The case can be considered without the presence of the husband, but in this case he will need to submit a petition to the court, which requests that the case be considered without his participation.

    I want to divorce a foreign citizen, but I’m afraid that he will take our child with him?

    In this case, there are two contradictory provisions:

    1. Based on the words of the UN convention, the child must remain with the mother in almost all cases. The father can obtain the right to raise a child only in cases where the mother has a drug addiction, severe mental disorders, or is accused of child molestation;
    2. On the other hand, the legislation of the Russian Federation establishes equal rights of both parents to the child. If a woman refuses to allow communication between father and child, the husband can file a lawsuit.
    To avoid any unpleasant moments, it is recommended to draw up a prenuptial agreement before entering into marriage.
    A marriage contract is also concluded after the birth of a child, but in this case it must be notarized at the place of birth of the baby. It is necessary to specify in it who the child will stay with, leaving references to international laws.

    Of course, I don’t want to set out in advance the conditions under which a divorce will occur, but in civilized countries this practice has long been used. In most cases, this will help to quickly resolve the problem, without putting pressure on the child.

    Source: http://godsvadba.ru

    How to divorce your spouse without losses and problems?

    Divorce is a drama in the life of all family members. Lack of experience in litigation, emotional intensity, stress and unexpected actions of the spouse and his relatives can turn this period into a real nightmare. However, if you arm yourself with knowledge, calmness and a sober view of things, you can come out of this situation with honor. How to divorce your husband competently and painlessly?

    The simplest and most peaceful divorce procedure is dissolution by mutual desire of a marriage in which there are no joint minor children. An application for divorce is written in the registry office.

    There, a month later, a divorce certificate is issued and a stamp is placed in the passport. If there are minor children in the marriage, one of the spouses does not agree to divorce, or there is no consensus on the division of property, then the marriage is dissolved in court.

    In this article, we will consider what to do if the need arises for a divorce, how to competently and painlessly organize the divorce process, where to start and how to go through this procedure as quickly as possible.

    General procedure

    Let's say you made a decision: “I want to divorce my husband.” You are married and have a small child. During their life together, they bought a car, furniture, and equipment. What to do?

    You need to go to the magistrate's court at your place of residence - there you will be provided with a sample application for divorce, a sample application for alimony and a list of documents that you need to collect and attach to the applications.

    You can write an application for alimony even while you are married. The first alimony payments arrive late. The sooner you write an application for alimony, the sooner you will receive it. The application for alimony must be accompanied by a certificate of the husband’s income.

    You can personally visit the company where your spouse works, go to the accounting department and order a certificate.
    Even if your husband serves in a closed organization, for example, at a military institute, you can tell him at the entrance about the purpose of your visit, and they will take you to the accounting department.

    Among other documents and their photocopies, a receipt for payment of the state fee for divorce must be attached to the divorce application. In court, you will be given the details to which you need to transfer money, and they will tell you the exact amount.

    Go to the bank and ask a female consultant to help you pay the state fee. As soon as all the necessary documents are provided to the court, a court hearing will be scheduled. You and your husband will be informed about the date of the meeting in an official letter.

    Property issues

    If you want to divide property over 100,000 rubles in court, then you need to write an application for division of property to the district court. At this stage it is better to hire a lawyer. Ideally, it is better to contact a specialist who combines private practice with public work in the same or magistrates’ court.

    In this case, you get a good advantage - the lawyer personally knows the judge, his principles, and can even accurately find out about the expected outcome of the case.

    Regarding property, remember that your spouse may have time to resell his car for next to nothing, say, to his father.
    Therefore, keep your divorce intentions secret and quickly give your license plate number to your lawyer. Once all documents have been submitted to the court, the spouse will receive notification from the court by phone and letter.

    It is better to hide the collected package of documents securely so that your husband does not take them. Change the passwords on your cards. It happens that spouses cash out money without saying a word. And also collect all documents for furniture and household appliances: receipts, warranty cards. If you have them, you will be able to confirm that such items were purchased by you.

    Remember that in your absence, especially if you have moved in with your parents or into a rented apartment, your spouse can remove the furniture and change the lock on the door.

    Consideration of the case

    During your divorce hearing, you, your husband, and the magistrate will be in the courtroom. If you did not have time to collect all the documents for the district court, ask the judge for a deferment. Justify this by the fact that you suddenly realized that the marriage can still be saved. If you have a minor child, you will be given a 100% deferment for a month.

    A new hearing in the magistrate's court will take place in a month. You will be divorced, and in another month you will receive a divorce statement from the registry office.

    At the registry office, carefully check each letter in the record book and in the certificate. The slightest undetected mistake will create difficulties when concluding a second marriage.

    In the district court, more than one hearing may take place on the division of property. If you share a car, you must pay a fee, which is calculated based on the cost of the car. If you share an apartment with your car, then pay another fee, the amount of which also depends on its value.

    In this case, you can agree with the judge that you will first pay a symbolic amount, say 1000 rubles, because you do not have sufficient financial resources. You can pay the rest of the amount later.

    You can expect a counterclaim from your spouse for the division of loans: during the proceedings, the judge may demand from the defendant an extract of the status of all his accounts.

    The outcome of the proceedings may be a judge's decision or the signing of a settlement agreement.
    In the first case, you can oblige the defendant to pay your costs for state fees and a lawyer. In the second case, you can receive a fixed amount specified in the agreement. In this case, your husband may refer to his poor financial condition and ask for an installment plan to repay the debt within a year.

    A brief plan for divorce is as follows. To get a divorce through the registry office, you must adhere to the following procedure:

    1. Pay the state fee for divorce at the bank and take a receipt.
    2. Prepare documents and their photocopies: marriage certificate, passports.
    3. Write an application for divorce to the registry office together with your husband. If he cannot appear at the registry office, then provide him with an application to sign. He must have his signature certified by a notary.
    4. In a month, you will receive a divorce certificate from the registry office.

    The divorce procedure in court includes the following procedure:

    1. Pay the state fee for divorce at the bank and receive a receipt.
    2. Appear in the magistrate's court and write an application for divorce.

    Some documents and their photocopies must be attached to the application:

    • bank receipt for payment of state fees for divorce;
    • marriage certificate;
    • child’s birth certificate (copy certified by a notary);
    • an extract from the housing office at the husband’s place of residence;
    • a certificate of your husband’s income (if you are filing a claim for alimony);
    • husband's application for divorce (if he agrees).

    How to avoid scandals?

    In such a dramatic situation, it is very important to avoid loud showdowns, especially in front of young children, since for them the breakdown of a family is the most painful.

    Follow a few tips:

    1. Maintain a neutral position. Don't react to provocations. Don't make excuses.
    2. Refrain from reproaches. Don't blame. Do not express insults or sarcastic remarks. Don't get personal. Keep your opinion to yourself even in small things. Now you don't owe him anything, and he doesn't owe you anything.
    3. Don't do any small things to spite him. Behave peacefully. Don't make things worse.
    4. If your husband proves his position and accuses you, remain silent. Without finding a new reason for discussion in your words, he will not be able to endlessly continue his tirade.
    5. Try to move to different apartments as soon as possible. If you meet only in the courtroom, the chances of conflict situations will be minimized. The judge will not allow the defendant and his relatives to create a scandal. You can even completely entrust the divorce process to a lawyer. He will represent you in court, and you will not have to listen to accusations against you.
    6. Choose a good moment and try to talk frankly with your husband. Try to agree to part as friends. If you have children, then in the future you will have to build new relationships. Be prepared to compromise. Tell him how you see his interaction with the child.
    On the other hand, even if you try your best to maintain calm, you cannot control the behavior of your husband and his relatives.

    Moreover, the husband’s parents may come specially to create a huge scandal involving neighbors. They can make threats and provoke your parents to come. If your parents are in a neighboring city or village, or for some reason cannot come, you can call the police. Both you and your parents from another city can do this.

    The police, of course, will not be able to prohibit the husband’s parents from being in the apartment where their son is registered and lives. However, something else is important - you show that you are not alone, you have protection, and you are capable of decisive action.
    As a last resort, in the presence of the police, you can calmly pack your things and leave with your child to visit your family or friends.

    Tune in for the best. You need to gain courage in order to survive this difficult stage of life as painlessly as possible.

    Remember that someday you will look at the events of your life with completely different eyes and will be grateful that this person left your life, giving way to another person and another relationship.

    Source: http://obrakah.ru

    How to survive a divorce from your husband, regardless of age, advice from a psychologist

    Divorce is a very difficult experience for a woman. Every representative of the fair sex finds herself in a state of stress. She begins to ask herself a lot of questions: “Why did he leave me,” “Why couldn’t I make him happy,” “How can I keep him?”, and, of course, “How to survive a divorce from my loved one?”

    If you find yourself in a similar situation, then do not blame or reproach yourself for anything. You should survive this period without turning it into a struggle for the love of your ex-spouse, and start a new life.

    How to survive a divorce if you still love your husband very much

    Pain, sadness and longing fill the heart. The first days after a divorce for a woman who has separated from a man seem unbearable, especially if we still love our ex-husband, it is not so easy to get over it! Of course, time heals, but often this process drags on for a very long time and leads to deep depression. Try to avoid this.

    Start dealing with the problem immediately, use the following tips:

    1. Give free rein to your tears. During a divorce, your soul becomes difficult because the person you love is leaving you. Give yourself a few days to cry. It will become a little easier for you, because you will release negative emotions. The pain will dull.
    2. Beware of aggression. Divorce is traumatic. Because of it, you begin to feel pain, leading to aggression. In this state, you may decide to take wrong and dangerous steps. Try to control yourself. Don't worry about unfulfilled relationships. Divorce is just the beginning of something new and wonderful.
    3. Stop thinking about your ex-husband and don't look for meetings with him. Stop visiting his page on social networks. If you constantly look at his photos and read his statuses, you will only make your situation worse.
    4. Let go of past relationship anchors. Throw away all things from your home that remind you of your ex-husband, remove family photos, burn love letters and cards that bring back sentimental memories. Until you do this, you will not be able to calm down and start life from scratch.
    5. Take care of yourself. Let go of the past and start living in the present. First of all, pay attention to your appearance. Update your wardrobe, join the gym, go to the hairdresser and beautician. This will distract you from your worries.
    Get your thoughts in order too. Think about what you did wrong in your last marriage and draw conclusions. Take out from the burning hut the good memories left over from your life together, and the experience of your mistakes regarding how not to build relationships.

    How to survive a separation from your husband after 40 years

    Women have a very hard time with divorce after 40 years. Some people believe that they will no longer be able to find their soulmate and will be left alone. Such thoughts are wrong. Don't think that 40 years is old. At this age, life is just beginning.

    • at the age of 40 you can easily arrange your life, because in the modern world the possibilities of any person are unlimited;
    • after separation, none of the spouses owe anyone anything anymore, so you can live for yourself and engage in self-improvement;
    • You shouldn’t be in a depressed state, because breaking up a relationship after 40 years brings many positive aspects (for example, it encourages personal growth and development).

    You can start a new life at any age. Even at 50 years old. This is the right time to start paying attention to yourself, because the children are already grown up. Buy new clothes, cosmetics for yourself, transform yourself and do something new. This will be the best way to distract yourself from worries and worries.

    Sign up, for example, for an amateur club. There you will meet new people. Among them there will be men, both married and single. Gradually you will feel that your feelings for your ex-husband are dulling. You can sign up for a gym or swimming pool. Exercise will make your body fit, and water will calm your nerves.

    How to survive a divorce from your husband if you have children?!

    As a rule, divorce always affects the entire family, including children. Your task is to protect them from what is happening. In any case, divorce will be traumatic for children, but the less they see and know, the less painful this trauma will be. The following tips from our psychologist may help you.

    Do not use the child as a tool to get the man you love back and do not turn him against his father.
    Your child needs a normal and harmonious relationship with both you and your husband. It’s not worth maintaining a relationship for the sake of the children, because the atmosphere in the family will still be unhealthy.

    Live for your child. He will grow up and understand everything. He will form his own point of view regarding divorce. It is very important that the child, growing up, thinks that his parents did everything to protect him, and did not use him.

    At first, after a divorce, it seems that life will not return to its previous course. It feels empty inside. However, it is possible to survive a divorce. You just need to take the first step. Gradually, the desire to change your life for the better and find your soul mate will awaken.

    Dear readers, you will be interested in this article if you have the desire “I want to divorce my wife.” You will find out what reasons most often provoke men to have such thoughts. You will become aware of why wives may not agree to divorce. Find out what to do if you have a child together.

    Far-fetched reasons

    The desire to get a divorce is not always justified. Often the reason may turn out to be frivolous, and the solution to the problem is accessible without breaking up.

    1. The opinion that your spouse has changed and is no longer the one you married. In fact, the girl remained the same, the period of elevated hormones simply ended, the strong feeling of love subsided. Your task is to try to get to know her again, to learn to live with her as she is. Do not forget that you too could change in her eyes. Therefore, the grinding stage must be mutual.
    2. She doesn't comply with my demands! The fact is that these are not the times when a man’s word was law. Today, women have the same rights as males. If your wife is a careerist, an independent woman, then you should not turn her into a forced housewife. There is no need to try to change your wife to suit you; you are already adults with mature personalities. Should have looked before marriage.
    3. She has a lot of flaws. When choosing a life partner, we look for people who match us. Most likely, the number of her shortcomings is equal to yours. And dissatisfaction with her is, in fact, a manifestation of the fact that you are dissatisfied with yourself.
    4. It's all her fault. This is a misconception. Coziness and comfort in the family should be created by both spouses. In addition, in any conflict, both are to blame.

    Frequent occasions

    There are different reasons for divorcing your wife. Some of them are minor, after thinking everything through well, you can fix everything, while others are very serious - divorce is the only way out.

    1. I'm tired of the monotony and quiet, calm life. Here you need to analyze yourself and the whole situation as a whole. You may be lacking adrenaline, but why get a divorce right away? Climb a mountain and make a parachute jump. After all, no one forces you to sit at home and do nothing. In addition, it is not necessary that boredom is dictated by the presence of a specific woman next to you. After all, it could easily turn out that, in fact, you have lost the true purpose of your life or you are too lazy to strive for something. Perhaps you just need to reconsider your life ideals and take care of yourself.
    2. The wife constantly nags, is dissatisfied with everything, humiliates and insults. There are three options to consider here. In the first, you have a good wife, but she also has the right to be dissatisfied with something. And in this case, you just need to listen to her demands. The second option is that she endlessly humiliates, this is the type of woman who cannot live without biting her husband. At the same time, some men constantly strive to become better so that their spouse does not reproach them, and thus achieves many successes. But if your changes aren't enough, maybe she just needs someone else. The third option is that the man himself provokes scandals. This most often happens if he no longer has feelings, there is a desire to start a relationship with another woman, but he is tormented by a feeling of guilt.
    3. Treason. Perhaps you have such a nature, you are not able to remain faithful to one woman, from time to time you go on the side, but at the same time you continue to love your spouse and do not want to part with her. If you are caught in the act, you need to rehabilitate yourself, say that you love your wife very much, and this will never happen again. The second case is when everything is fine in the family, but suddenly a woman appears who drives you crazy. And here a difficult choice arises. If she cheats, you can forgive if you love her very much. If you have been looking for a reason for divorce for a long time, then this is a suitable case.
    4. My wife was tormented by constant bouts of jealousy. Perhaps she is not confident in herself or is afraid of losing you. It is possible that the fear is due to the fact that you have previously been seen cheating. But sometimes jealousy becomes pathological. And here you cannot do without the help of a psychologist, but there is no need to get a divorce right away.

    How to behave

    1. First, you need to be completely sure that your decision is correct. Think about your reasons for wanting to do this. Make sure nothing can be changed.
    2. It may not be a bad idea to consult a psychologist. If you think this is a waste of time, you can immediately contact a divorce specialist. He will tell you how to behave correctly, what to say to your wife.
    3. Choose the right place to talk to your spouse. It is unacceptable to talk in front of children, in the presence of colleagues, friends or relatives. It will be better if the conversation takes place in an area where the wife will feel relaxed.
    4. Be confident in your desire, speak directly about the fact that you want to get a divorce. No need to come from far.
    5. If your spouse starts asking for another chance, do not agree if your decision was final. You must not show weakness.
    6. Make sure that the conversation takes place without shouting or insults. Remain polite, calm and level-headed.

    Why is my spouse against it?

    It is extremely rare for a wife to immediately agree to a divorce. She agrees in cases where she herself has thought about it. Let's look at what reasons may force a woman to fight for her marriage.

    1. If there is a child, there is a desire to save the family, do not leave him without a father. Fear that it will not be possible to find an adequate replacement, to find a man who can treat the baby as if he were his own. It is possible that the woman herself grew up without a father and does not want this for her child.
    2. Doesn't want to be left alone. She is afraid that no one will pay attention to her, especially if she has a child.
    3. Holds on to material wealth. Especially if you have an apartment or maintain it.
    4. Doesn't want to get divorced status. Afraid of judgment from relatives, ridicule from friends. There is a fear that the new spouse will not be the same as the previous one. She does not want her boyfriend to treat her as a woman of easy availability due to the fact that she was already married.
    5. The woman really loves you very much and sees no point in life without your presence.

    If there is a child

    For many men, having children prevents them from leaving the family. They continue to endure, make concessions - all so that the baby does not suffer. Therefore, it is necessary to think repeatedly about your decision whether to get a divorce. But you need to understand that a family that exists only for the sake of a common child cannot be considered normal. In such cases, it is possible that the psychological trauma will be more severe if the parents stay together rather than divorce.

    While maintaining a marriage, quarrels may constantly occur in your family, and an unhealthy environment will be observed.

    What could be the consequences for a child of preserving his family for his sake:

    1. The baby can grow up withdrawn or, on the contrary, aggressive.
    2. It is possible that difficulties may arise in meeting new children and people of the opposite sex. An early search for love is not excluded.
    3. Forming the wrong idea about relationships, family and love in general. A grown-up child runs the risk of transferring this pattern of behavior into his family.
    4. A child may try to find a person who will love him if his parents are busy with their own problems and do not give him enough. And this can lead to a painful break in the relationship, because the search for feelings will begin too early.
    5. Lack of desire to develop, learn something new.
    6. Inferiority complex, development of phobias.
    7. The desire to live in the virtual world.
    8. Self-hatred. The cause may be pre-existing obesity.
    9. In rare cases, suicidal tendencies.

    Considering the above, you must realize that maintaining a marriage will not always have a better effect on the child’s psyche than its dissolution.

    Doing the right thing

    To make your separation as least painful for the kids as possible, you need to talk to them before filing for divorce. Your task is to convince children that:

    • they have nothing to do with the fact that parents should separate;
    • Your love for them will remain the same, there is no one dearer than them in the whole wide world;
    • You will continue to devote all your free time to them;
    • You will continue to help them financially.

    In this situation, it is important that the divorce from the wife takes place amicably, without scandals and hatred. Otherwise, your spouse will begin to turn your children against you and will forbid you to see them.

    When everything has been agreed upon

    You have made a decision, informed your wife about it, she gives the go-ahead, what to do next?

    1. Find out by visiting the registry office when you can file for divorce.
    2. On the appropriate day, come with your spouse to submit an application.
    3. Provide a photocopy of your marriage certificate, passport and child certificate, if any.
    4. Fill out the required forms.
    5. Wait a month, which is allocated so that the couple can change their mind about their decision.
    6. Arrive on the appointed day to file your divorce.
    1. Before communicating your intention, think about how the division of acquired property will take place.
    2. If the wife does not want to agree to a divorce, it is necessary to visit a lawyer. They will help solve this problem.
    3. Only talk about divorce when you really mean to do it. This statement should not be used to intimidate your spouse into changing her behavior. What if she really decides to divorce you.
    4. Never involve children in your quarrels. You should not threaten your wife that you will take them away. Moreover, blackmail her with this in order to get a divorce.

    When making such a fateful decision, you must think carefully about everything. Make sure that there really is no way to reach a compromise and that the reason for the divorce is serious. Remember that you need to think about how the children will feel, but you should not stay with your wife just for their sake.

    Divorce is a scary word, but it sounds very often.

    For a woman, the decision to divorce is a very difficult and serious one. After all, a woman takes marriage bonds seriously and reverently, and breaking them is a big stress.

    Therefore, divorce from your husband is a real drama. You can’t do it so easily, because such a step changes the rest of your life.

    What are women afraid of?

    When wondering how to divorce their husband, most women imply certain fears that keep them from this decisive and fateful act.

    They are not unfounded and often force women to live for years in a dysfunctional family, with an unloved and unloving person, without daring to divorce their husband, which is so necessary.

    What are these factors?

    1. The child or children will be left without a dad. If the couple already has a child, or several, then the situation becomes very aggravated. And if a woman is pregnant, then everything is even more complicated.

    Because, being a wife, the woman was calm that the child had a father and mother, that is, at least some vague semblance of a full-fledged family. And now she will be a single mother, an ex-wife, with a child in her arms - or a baby soon, if she is pregnant.

    In general, it is even more difficult for a pregnant woman, because she feels especially defenseless, confused and vulnerable...

    2. What means to live on? This question occupies many women who are planning to divorce their husbands.

    If a woman, as a wife, was supported by her husband and was accustomed to him feeding the family and bringing money into the house, then it will be very difficult for her. And even more so if a woman has a child or is pregnant.

    After all, getting a husband to provide for himself after a divorce is still a task, and it’s not a fact that he will agree to it. In any case, you will have to start earning money, supporting yourself, and if a woman is not used to this, it will be difficult.

    3. People around you won’t understand. This, unfortunately, is also a common reason for a woman’s fear to make an important and right decision.

    Many women are terribly afraid that they will not be understood and accepted by those around them - relatives, friends, acquaintances. Someone else’s opinion is sometimes so important that because of this absurd fear, the spouse is ready to endure humiliation and a hellish life with a man.

    4. Loneliness is torment! This reason is very clear. Women are afraid of loneliness, ashamed of it, and consider it something terrible.

    And they often prefer to live life together with just anyone, just so as not to remain in terrible loneliness. For such women, a divorce from their husband is a guarantee that they will become lonely and useless to anyone.

    All these fears are as real and justified as they may seem at first. And often before divorcing their husbands, the vast majority of women vaguely realize that fear is stronger than them - and continue to live in unimaginable conditions. Without love and mutual understanding, without happiness and hope...

    But what can we do?

    Of course, you can endure it forever. But you can make the right decision - and finally change your destiny for the better.

    Of course, the easiest way is to remain a victim - it is very convenient and easy. It is so common for our women to be unhappy - this image of the sufferer is incredibly popular among wives.

    Instead of building their own happiness, taking responsibility for their destiny and working on themselves, ladies often prefer to do nothing. And scold, at all costs, unscrupulous and treacherous husbands. They say they are to blame for all the troubles...

    This position is very immature and unwise. And most importantly, it doesn’t make anyone feel any better, and it doesn’t change anything for the better. Please decide what you would prefer to do - complain and feel sorry for yourself, or take fate into your gentle, but so strong hands?

    Many ladies on every corner exclaim: “I want to divorce my husband,” but nevertheless do absolutely nothing. They continue to torment and exhaust both themselves and the man.

    They continue to remain an unhappy wife and do not know that everything can be changed quite quickly and almost painlessly. But first you need to understand whether it’s worth doing...

    When is it worth thinking again?

    It is important that such a decision as divorcing your husband is not rash. It is worth very clearly understanding that this is the collapse of the family, this is a very responsible step that will significantly affect fate in the future!

    And the reasons for this must be very serious. In what cases should you not rush into a divorce and it is better to think about how to improve your relationship?

    1. You have an affair. This happens. And often. Sometimes even the most faithful wives and husbands have affairs on the side. What to do if you suddenly fell madly in love with another man, and you can’t look at your own spouse?

    Take your time under no circumstances! Even when you firmly think that you have finally found the true love of your life, and your marriage is just a mistake, do not rush. Women are so often subject to emotions that they can make such a mess that it will be impossible to rebuild their life again.

    Don't want to be left with nothing? Take your time. After all, now it’s hard for you to believe that this romance is not forever, and then you will be left alone. And you will regret the broken marriage.

    A wise woman does not leave her husband for another, but finds love and strength in herself to believe that her husband is the best man. This is aerobatics.

    2. He offended me. This is also a very common reason for divorce. Conflicts and grievances are an everyday matter. Women know how and love to blame men; they do not know how to listen and think. And therefore they are inclined to destroy a stable and good union because of nonsense!

    If you are in conflict with your husband, you have obvious misunderstandings, quarrels and friction - do not rush to break off the relationship. Think, maybe you can somehow fix everything? After all, without a doubt, it is possible!

    Can't figure out how? Contact a family psychologist. But don’t destroy the family - the same frictions and conflicts will still be in the new relationship!

    3. Feelings have cooled down... When we fall in love, we think that it will always be this way. But one day the passion fades away, and is replaced by habit, attachment and everyday life. And it’s better that gratitude, respect and friendship remain.

    These are the components of family love, and not passion or lust. If your feelings for your faithful life partner have faded, take action, but divorce does not apply here.

    You can force yourself to take a fresh look at the man you love, find a common language with him and understand that family is a valuable gift. Take care of him...

    When is divorce necessary?

    Without a doubt, there are times when divorce is simply necessary. And this is where you should not be afraid and act quickly, decisively and boldly. What are these cases?

    1. The husband drinks or uses drugs. This is a tragedy that not every woman can cope with. Living with an alcoholic or drug addict is hell. You will have to leave him without regrets. Forever.

    To be the wife of such a man means exposing yourself not only to torment, but also to danger. In this tragic case, it is simply necessary to act quickly and decisively - and divorce is undoubtedly needed here.

    2. He is a tyrant. This is a terrible reality: domestic terror is very common in our country. If your husband ruins your life, beats you, insults you, puts moral pressure on you - don’t tolerate it! Run away from this person, without looking back and without fear.

    You should no longer be afraid of his presence in your life, fear his every word or look. Leave without a doubt! Forget excuses and don't be afraid of anything.

    Don’t say that he is yours, dear, beloved, just with a bad character... Leave immediately, otherwise your life will be ruined forever.

    3. He cheats constantly. There are such Casanovas - lovers of women. And many wives suffer, suffer, cry at night... But they cannot do anything.

    The husband goes after his mistresses, and it happens that he doesn’t even hide it, but doesn’t abandon his family. After all, this is a comfort zone, a place where he is loved, fed, and his shirt is ironed.

    If you are the wife of such a man, leave without explanation. And don't expect everything to work out.

    4. He does not want to develop. This, of course, is a controversial issue, but it is often a powerful argument for divorce. If you are a purposeful, active woman, and he sits in front of the TV and does not want to get up to do something... This is a problem.

    Such men have no goals in life, do not want to look for an interesting job and develop in it, and are not interested in the world around them. In general, it’s strange if an active and intelligent woman is next to such a person - it’s unclear how she fell for him. But this happens.

    Sometimes a woman manages to change it, but rarely. If you see that he has absolutely no prospects, it is better to leave peacefully.

    Quiet, peaceful, human...

    I need to leave - the decision has been made. But how? So that without scandal, without noise and quarrels, and without making an enemy? Alas, things are not always simple here. It all depends on the man, his temperament and his attitude towards you personally.

    It happens that the husband does not resist - and then the issue can be resolved peacefully and easily. In this case, you need to take a marriage certificate, passports and go together to the registry office, where you will write an application for divorce. You also need to pay a fee (about 400 rubles for each spouse, the registry office employees will tell you in detail about this).

    But sometimes he can create a “fun life”. Your task is to save face and not get involved in conflicts. If he does not want to get a divorce, resolve the issue without his presence. In this case, you also need to go to the registry office and find out how the divorce process goes through the court.

    What if he doesn't let go?

    This is also possible. If your spouse does not want to get a divorce, the court will help you. In principle, you can get a divorce without the presence of your husband if you know how to get a divorce if your husband is against it.

    Where to begin? First of all, you will need a good, experienced lawyer, preferably a woman. You can start with a consultation.

    Explain the problem, and let the lawyer tell you how to get a divorce without your husband’s consent, and what this will require. Most likely, you will have a headache, but you must remain calm and carry yourself with dignity. After all, you have made a decision!

    It will not be easy to force a man to divorce, but it will be even more difficult not to break down yourself. The main condition is to immediately disperse, leave the house in which the man lives.

    If you can’t get him to leave, you will have to leave yourself. At least temporarily to my mother or friend, if there is nowhere to go yet. Be patient.

    Without the presence of a man, or with his presence, without a scandal, or with a war - you will get a divorce if you want. Another thing is to build your future life...

    Life goes on!

    After a divorce, a new life awaits a woman. Where to begin? After all, everything is different now! The head is spinning from unusual freedom, and conflicting feelings are simultaneously fighting in the heart - happiness from deliverance and fear of loneliness...

    Don't be afraid of anything! After all, you have taken an important step, which means you have taken your destiny under your own responsibility. This suggests that you are an intelligent, strong woman, and everything will work out for you.

    • Start with work and home improvement. If possible, be sure to change your place of residence; do not live in a place where everything reminds you of a failed marriage. Take care of yourself!
    • Divorce takes a huge amount of energy. Get yourself in order. Do yoga, start being creative, find time for good deeds and charity, or just helping people. Change your life for the better!
    • And most importantly, don’t wish harm on anyone. Not to my ex-husband, not to his friends, not to his parents. As long as you radiate negativity and anger, your life will be unhappy. But as soon as you forgive the offender and start a new life, everything will change!
    • Take care of your soul - fill it with light and love. Do not rush into revelry when you feel freedom - think about the quality of your new life.
    • Try to communicate only with worthy people, do not stoop to gossip and condemnation. Don't let anyone around you discuss your personal life or talk bad about your ex-husband.

    If you manage to build your new life in this way: you begin to communicate with kind and bright people, visit only good, spiritual places, clear your mind from anger and resentment, your heart from hatred and the desire to take revenge, and your speech from abuse and curses.

    If you begin to bring light and goodness to everyone around you, you will be surprised how the world around you will bloom. Absolutely everyone will love you - and true miracles will begin to happen around you. You will not be afraid to be alone, because you will create.

    And one day, a worthy person will miraculously come into your bright life - someone who will never poison your life, but, on the contrary, will fill it with happiness, bright colors, joy and harmony. Just wait for him - and don’t waste yourself just not to be alone.

    Loneliness is temporary - it is given to you as a gift, as an opportunity to renew, cleanse, blossom and improve yourself. And this takes time - so don’t rush things, learn to trust the world.

    Having survived the divorce with dignity, having learned this lesson, you will be able to improve your destiny, change it beyond recognition, and you will thank the world for this valuable experience. And the most important advice

    If you like to give advice and help other women, take free coaching training from Irina Udilova, master the most in-demand profession and start earning from 70-150 thousand:

      He doesn’t drink, he doesn’t hit, he’s not a tyrant, but there is no love for each other, he doesn’t want to sit at home with us, he doesn’t come up with anything to do with his daughter, he doesn’t help with the car, he only listens to his mother, I want to get a divorce, but my salary is small, I won’t be able to dress my daughter decently with that salary, take care of myself, I don’t even know what to do...

      Wonderful article!

      I filed for divorce, they postponed it for a month, they told me to think about it. My husband is not a bad person, at first everything was fine! But after the birth of my son, everything changed. He raised his hand a couple of times, beat him badly once! After the beating, the relationship deteriorated, I cannot call him affectionately or hug him, he has become like an empty place. And problems began with his mother, maybe she’s jealous of him, my husband calls me names often - I’m tired of it! And I left and filed for divorce, now I’m sitting and thinking, did I do the right thing? I’m very worried, it’s bad that he doesn’t do anything to get us back, but he said on the phone that he doesn’t want to get a divorce, so the trial was postponed! I'm confused

      This is all great, but what to do if he doesn’t leave MY apartment. Such a doomsday begins. There is nowhere to go on my own, even for a while. It just clings like pincers. And he becomes kind and affectionate, or like a dragon bursts with fire. And the child looks at it all.

      I don’t know what to do, my husband has long lost respect in my eyes, it just infuriates me! He doesn’t smoke, doesn’t hit, but he married me, my parents bought him a car, we live in my apartment, there’s no money at all, because there’s no permanent job. My parents pay for the utilities, I buy food and everything (vacuum cleaners, dishes, washing machines) for the house myself. I provide for myself, and I also put aside 50 thousand for my child every month, so that I have something to live on when I go on maternity leave (I can’t wait to hear from him). He sits at home watching movies. I am a pregnant 6th year student, and I also work! I don’t have the strength to carry it all on myself, study, then work, lessons. And from him there is no care, no affection, no kind word, no material help, and when I ask for help around the house, he does everything with such a favor... On this basis there are constant scandals and nerves. I want to get a divorce, but what if it changes? Is there hope? I want the child to have a father, but not a worthless one (((

      And my husband is handsome, smart, doesn’t party, doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke, a DESPOTE! Scandals out of the blue, he didn’t like my tone of voice, I don’t have the right to tell him certain things, but he can. He can raise his voice at me, call me names, send me away, but I don’t! Because I am a woman and a wife! This is my fault, during the period of postpartum depression I told him a lot of things and offended him, but we went to see a doctor and everything went away. It’s clear that his love for me has disappeared and any word I say is perceived as disrespect. I think it’s better to get a divorce, remain friends and not traumatize the child’s psyche.

      Good article, but I have decided that I will file for divorce. My husband listens to everyone except me, he is annoyed that I ask you to pay attention to me (does not apply to the material plane). Sometimes, in the heat of a quarrel, he applies his hand. Only big catch, I'm very early in my pregnancy. I don’t want him to be considered my child’s father at all. There is no way to show care and tenderness at such a moment; on the contrary, he drives me into hysterics. We don’t allow ourselves anything extra anyway, but at the time of my pregnancy he said that we would save. What else can you save on? Should I refuse food? I myself work and my money also went into the family budget, when one day I realized that my husband was saving his own nest egg, and we were living on mine. Then I started doing the same thing, which led to the fact that we now need to save. Although money was saved for building a house. We live with my parents, I pay the rent myself, my mother and my father help in many ways. Lives like a mouse in cereals. And still something doesn’t suit me. Here I have to be glad that my parents let us in, otherwise I would have paid for renting the apartment and for the service myself. This is where the savings would be. Although at the age of 30, earning good money, I could have saved up for housing long ago, that’s where I needed to save. And not on a pregnant wife. I can’t tell you everything... It’s boiling

      I am in the process of going through a divorce, just like Angelica. We have been married for 26 years. It’s a shame that I didn’t read such a good, motivational article earlier. I won't describe the whole nightmare. I want everything to end quickly.

      My husband pisses me off and gets me every time!! I don’t know how I married him?! We already have two children. He counts down to the last penny what he buys, which he will take away in case of a quarrel. His parents and sisters are more important to him than his wife and children! We don't have an idyll, just a nightmare. I want to get a divorce as soon as possible, but I think about it, baby, I don’t want them to grow up without a father, just as I grew up without a father! I don't know where to give in.

      Hello! I don’t know how to continue to live with my husband! Constant insults, everything irritates him - home, family, people! It’s easier for me when he’s not there, I feel better. When he's home, I'm on edge! Constant cooking in the kitchen, silence in the house (sometimes we go outside for a walk so he can rest). Married for eight years, two children. I’m not afraid of getting a divorce, but he doesn’t want to, he loves children very much! What to do?

      The article is very vital. I can’t get a divorce with 2 small children, my husband constantly goes to work in different businesses and a large sum of money remains everywhere, and I pay off - discretionary payments, bonuses, vacation pay, New Year’s pay, everything goes towards his debts. And now I again owe a large amount to suppliers, I took out a loan, only half of the debt was repaid, and I’m up to my neck in loans. As a normal person, kind and talkative, he doesn’t drink, he’s not a tyrant, his children love him. How can I be in such a situation with my head, I understand that I need to get a divorce, but I feel sorry for the children, they should have a father...

      My situation is worse. I dated my husband for 5 years. Then we got married... And my beloved husband passed away. An incomprehensible person appeared in his guise. Who swings but doesn't hit. He yells and pouts his lips like a child. He wants to talk, he doesn't want to talk. He does what he wants. He wants to drink, he wants to not drink, but he is never guilty of anything. It's always my fault. I’m generally silent about sex... It doesn’t exist. I understand that I don't love him. And I don't need him. But how to quit... We've been married for a year. And everything about this man irritates me. It even infuriates me. I understand that he disgusts me. But I endure.

      My husband is a tyrant, drinks, curses, insults, the further it goes, the worse. Two small children, I’m on maternity leave, I have no one to help, nowhere to go, I don’t know what to do, I want a divorce.

      I really liked the article, it was as if we were talking to a psychologist :-) my husband seems to love affection, hugs... but there is no work and self-development, I want a dynamic, interesting life, which my ex-boyfriend offers and calls for marriage... he has prepared everything for a family life, lives abroad, but I don’t dare to go for a divorce...

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