Child upbringing 3 4 years psychology. Psychological features of the behavior of a child in three years. How to raise a boy to be a real man

A three-year-old child is already beginning to form a personality. Features of the behavior of children and their psychology during this period is denoted by the term "crisis of the age of three." Raising a three-year-old requires special patience and attention from parents. The specificity of his upbringing does not imply the use of excessive severity and an abundance of prohibitions, otherwise the child himself, having matured, will become too capricious, demanding and pedantic. The kid should not be humiliated and beaten, but he should be allowed to feel equality with adults.

Why do children not obey at three years old?

To choose the right parenting tactics, you need to understand what is behind the bad behavior of the baby. At the same time, it is worth dismissing any gender differences in behavior, since they simply do not exist at this age, and the reasons for disobedience are about the same. Psychologists use the concept of “frustration”, which refers to such a mental state when all the desires of a person cannot be fully satisfied. The child gradually understands that not everything can turn out according to his desire, much is inaccessible to him, he is forced to obey something, and so he gradually grows up.
Every sensitive, observant parent perfectly understands his child and knows when the baby is naughty simply because he wants to satisfy his desire, and when the cause of disobedience is something else: problems in kindergarten that the baby is afraid to reveal to parents, malaise, etc. .
Here are the main reasons why 3-4 year olds misbehave:

• Fight for parental attention.
• The baby's attempt to assert itself, as a counteraction to too tight parental care. Already two-year-olds are striving for independence, as evidenced by their incessant babbling "I myself." Parents of the best feelings are trying to impose their own point of view on him. The child perceives this criticism “with hostility” and seeks to counteract it with his disobedience.
• Desire for revenge. There are situations when parents, often without even wanting to, cause suffering to the baby (mother made him finish eating his unloved porridge, and even hid the baby’s favorite toy).
• Loss of faith in one's own strengths. When a baby despairs or is disappointed in something, his behavior may become inadequate.

What is behind parental restrictions?

The ban can be compared with a kind of border set in front of the baby for his own protection. Prohibitions play an important educational role, helping to form children's perception of reality. They must learn to understand that there are times when you need to stop acting up, what you can and cannot do, and how to behave with dignity among people. It is clear that all children do not like the prohibitions of their parents too much, they react to them with irritation, protest, resentment, anger. However, one must be firm, knowing that psychologically they are important for a correct upbringing. It is a paradox, but even thanks to prohibitions, the child feels parental care, which calms and disciplines him.
In modern society, there are often situations when parents brought up with a large number of prohibitions, raising their children, try to allow them absolutely everything. Another common mistake is the opposite phenomenon, when parents forbid their kids too much, almost everything. Under these conditions, an indecisive, timid, timid child grows up, because he has formed a behavioral stereotype - to receive parental approval for any “sneeze”. In order to avoid such problems when raising a baby, parents should learn for themselves that each prohibition must have a reason and motivation. After all, the child should be clear why it is impossible to do so in a certain situation, and what consequences his act can cause.
Based on the reasons, all prohibitions can be divided into unconscious and conscious.

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Conscious prohibitions

• It is possible to classify as conscious those prohibitions by which the elders seek to protect the child from something. For example, in order to avoid a sore throat, my mother forbade eating ice cream.
• This also includes prohibitions that, according to parents, develop discipline in children, since without them the form of education is incomplete (there is pampering, permissiveness, whims, etc.).

Unconscious prohibitions

In unconscious prohibitions, the root causes often lie in the past and are more complex. Habit can also be the cause of unconscious inhibitions.

• Many mothers and fathers continue to use the same parenting methods as their parents, who at one time forbade them a lot. Therefore, now, out of inertia, they forbid the same to their children.
• This may be mixed with envy of the younger generation: if it was not available to us in our childhood, then you do not need to have it either.
• Often behind the prohibitions are the feelings and emotions of parents, their irritation and resentment. Then the ban acts as a punishment: “If you didn’t do as I ordered, then you won’t get a new toy!”.
• Parents' anxiety can also lead to prohibitions, especially when they seek to surround the child with excessive care, if only nothing happened to him!

But forbidding a 3-4-year-old baby anything in a judgmental tone, parents make a big mistake, because at this time the child feels only annoyance, shame, guilt. Such emotions will only negatively affect his upbringing.

Psychology of education of 3-4-year-old children

To choose the right vector for raising three-four-year-olds, it is necessary to take into account the key points of their development during this period. At this time, curiosity awakens, and endless “why?” Are pouring in, capable of infuriating any adult. But all his questions must be answered specifically, without going into details. If the adult himself does not know the answer, then you can not hesitate to tell the baby about it, promising to find the answer soon.
If the child went to kindergarten, and there he had difficulties with adaptation, then adults should help him overcome them. First you need to find out the reason (shyness, shyness, jealousy), and then choose the tactics of proper communication with peers - whether to share toys with them or, conversely, stand up for yourself. If the problem cannot be solved, and it becomes deeper, then you should contact a child psychologist.
The psychology of family education of three-four-year-olds should take into account the changes that the child's psyche undergoes in the process of growing up. The child has new feelings: shame, resentment, irritation, sadness, with which he cannot cope on his own, which is why it happens that he behaves badly. At such moments, it is important to support the baby, explaining to him that all his experiences are absolutely normal. It is necessary to convey to the baby that it is more appropriate to express your feelings in words, and not in bad behavior. The child needs to be praised more often, because he acutely feels the lack of praise. He should be punished only according to the case and in such a way that he knows why. You can praise him for his great diligence and achievements in any business. Even if the behavior of the child is not pleasing, he should always be told that he is loved.

Most psychologists say that children who need love the most behave the worst. And parents are perplexed why once again ...

Features of raising children according to their temperament

Parents at some point sometimes notice that children can react differently to the same events: they listen to some remarks calmly, others begin to indulge and be naughty even more, and there are those who arrange real tantrums and a storm of disobedience. Therefore, the same educational approach cannot be mechanically applied to all children, since each baby has its own temperament. Given the type of temperament, you can pick up the key to any, even the most naughty baby. If a 3-4-year-old baby is raised incorrectly, his temperament is not taken into account, then you can not only meet disobedience and problems, but in the future his personality can completely degrade.
When a child is often scolded and even beaten, then growing up and becoming an adult, he often finds himself subject to bad addictions (nicotine, alcohol, drugs). Such people have problems communicating both with peers and with people of other ages.
Psychologists distinguish 4 types of character temperament:

• choleric;
• sanguine;
• phlegmatic people;
• melancholic.

Almost no real character falls exclusively under any type of temperament, their combinations in different proportions are much more common. The dominance of one or another type of temperament is determined by the variant of parental communication with the child. Toddlers with different temperaments react differently to similar situations, which is especially pronounced in cases of any failures.

Sanguine children

The easiest way to educate sanguine people, who most often have a good mood. In sanguine children, the following features can be noted:

• there are no mood swings, and even an upset baby will not fall to the floor, will not roar and kick with his feet;
• sanguine people are mobile, always aiming to interact with something, to run somewhere;
• they have high self-esteem and a strong nervous system;
• they quickly fall asleep, and wake up easily, which also characterizes the work of their nervous system.

But even these seemingly ideal children are not without flaws. So, sanguine people love to cheat, and if they do not want to do something, then it is almost impossible to force them.
Parents of sanguine children make a mistake when they take their children at their word - so they will only follow their lead. If you do not pay enough attention to these moments, then a swindler and a liar may well grow out of a child. In order not to have such consequences, parents must follow the line of education, where the child must fulfill parental requirements. This should be done without notations and shouting, but calmly. Another common mistake made by parents of young sanguine children is excessive praise.. If even such balanced children with good self-esteem are excessively praised, then they can “grab an asterisk”.

melancholic children

The melancholy type of temperament is one of those that require the most attention. Such unusually receptive children are very easy to offend and upset, and yelling at them is the same as arranging a physical execution. This type has the following features:

"Man" ... The word not only sounds proud, but also for society, the team is of great importance. The educational role is assigned (up to ...

• fast fatiguability;
• difficult adaptation to new conditions;
• increased sensitivity.

When raising a melancholic, blunders are public censure and punishment for poor academic performance. For a melancholic, learning in a large team already creates a stressful situation, so his main task in kindergarten and lower grades of the school is adaptation to his group or class, and only then do success in mastering academic disciplines.

Phlegmatic children

Phlegmatic people are calm and balanced, whose distinguishing features are:

• slowness;
• unemotionality;
• willingness to oversleep 10-12 hours a day.

When educating a phlegmatic, mistakes are passive pastime with him and verbally conveying requirements to him. It is better for him to show everything by his own example. If its development is not actively engaged, then it will remain "a stone under which water does not flow."

Choleric children

Cholerics can be called the engines of progress, who constantly need to do something, run somewhere, although they easily give up any business without finishing it. The main features of choleric:

• mobility, activity, noise;
• emotionality;
• restless sleep.

It is very important to properly educate a choleric person so that he does not grow up overly emotional and even aggressive, from which it is not far to antisocial behavior. When raising choleric children, parents often make mistakes, showing them excessive guardianship and care, as well as aggression. On the contrary, with a choleric person you need to behave in a balanced way, even despite the fact that he screams and plays pranks. It is impossible to suppress him, but it is more effective to respond to his whims in a calm tone. You can’t indulge his requirements either, but you should impose your life principles, adhere to reasonable prohibitions and long-term agreements.

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Any child from birth has an individual temperament, it determines the behavior of the baby in the early stages of development. It is advisable to start educational activities from the moment the child realizes his personality. The psychology of raising a child of 2-3 years includes tips that contribute to the versatile and harmonious development of the individual. By the behavior of a 2-3-year-old baby, it is too early to judge what his character will be like in adulthood. He is just learning to manage himself, and parents should help him with this.

Psychology of a child at 2 years old

Such a phenomenon as a crisis of two years is familiar to many parents of babies. Sometimes a child at this age literally transforms, begins to stubbornly at every step and show disobedience. He rejects any demands with unchildlike persistence and affirms his “I” with the help of protest.

The psychology of a child at 2 years old, both girls and boys, undergoes significant changes. At this time, the baby begins to realize his individuality, he learns to control his body and control natural functions. He realizes that he is not one with his mother, but is

To emphasize his independence, the baby resists any requests and in every possible way counteracts the pressure of his parents. Only by opposing himself to adults does he embark on the path of individualization. Parents just need to survive this period, because without it further formation is impossible.

Features of the psychological development of a child of 2 years:

• The child learns to imitate. A parent or teacher is a standard for him.
• Speech develops quickly and vocabulary is replenished. The baby can perform complex actions at the request of the parent. He tries to understand what adults are talking about and take part in the conversation.
• He is not yet very interested in peers. His favorite type of activity is the study of objects, and at this stage it is necessary to help the child to study their properties.
• The baby begins to master the generally accepted norms of behavior.
• He is not able to plan his actions and deeds. The child acts spontaneously, under the influence of an impulse.
• The kid explores his body and its properties in various positions, begins to use facial expressions.

The kid is trying to control himself physically and psychologically (he sits on the potty on his own, refuses to fulfill requests, runs away from an adult during a walk). At 2 years old, a sense of autonomy appears in the child's psychology, which needs to be reinforced.

Adults need to be patient and flexible. No need to try to break the stubbornness of the child, but you can’t give in endlessly either, there is a risk of raising a domestic tyrant. It is better to distract the baby, switch his attention to something interesting and fun. This will help avoid confrontation. It is necessary to praise the child for each achievement, to stimulate his creativity and imagination. He must feel that his opinion is respected and considered as an adult. But in things related to the health and safety of the baby, firmness should be shown. He will quickly learn that in some cases it is useless to persist.

Features of behavior and psychology of a child 2–3 years of age

We are not talking about the correct behavior of the baby until they reach 3 years old at all. At this time, his actions are dictated by the peculiarities of temperament. The child may behave unpredictably, changing his preferences many times during the day.

Development of speech and articulation skills

At two years old, a child understands a lot and often speaks well, his vocabulary is quickly replenished. You need to talk to your child as often as possible. It has been observed that children of silent parents learn speech much later. Phrases should be concise, but at the same time emotionally colored. You can not distort words when talking to a child.

Children who have sisters and brothers speak well at the age of 2 years. They express themselves in simple phrases about what is interesting to the baby. Older children use actions and commands in their games that require execution. This contributes to the development of speech skills. This is not the case in games with peers.

Games for two-year-olds should involve an adult or older child who initiates joint activities (for example, cooking Easter cakes, building a house). This will help toddlers to act collectively, compete and interact through speech.

A manual on child psychology for parents of babies 2-3 years of age recommends:

• play games with imitation of sounds. Kids like it and develop articulation skills in parallel;
• look at books and invite him to finish simple phrases himself;
• pronounce or sing difficult words;
• study the properties of objects, for example, soft toys (color, size, temperature, etc.);
• learn phrases and songs.

Differences in the psychology of a child 2–3 years old, girls:

• knowledge is better perceived in stages, they like repetition and consolidation;
• information is mainly perceived in audio form, so it is better for them not to show, but to explain;
• girls are not indifferent to bright and beautiful things. For games, dolls and soft toys are suitable for them, with which you can play scenes;
• they are sensitive to affection and more in need of tenderness than boys.

Girls 2-3 years old can buy sets of dishes, furniture and household appliances so that they can play housewives. They tend to imitate their mothers and love to help with the housework. This will help develop in them the desire to take care of someone, to show maternal feelings.

Tasks for children who have not yet mastered speech

Not always a baby at 2 years old can speak. This should not be a cause for concern if he understands when he is being addressed, fulfills the requests of his parents, and looks directly into his eyes during communication. He will definitely speak up over time. You need to talk to him more, read books, sing songs to him. It is also important to use fine motor skills for intellectual development.

The formation of speech depends partly on the physical development of the baby. In addition to fine motor skills, it is necessary to allow him outdoor games (cycling, climbing sports equipment, stairs). It is useful to purchase a sorter toy with at least 4 different shapes. During the game, you need to name the geometric shape and feel the boundaries of the contour with your fingers. Drop into the appropriate hole.

You can not limit the boy in pouring water and pouring any objects from one form to another. It is only necessary to first create a site that is easier to clean. You can make applications, cut out, sculpt balls and sausages from plasticine, draw figures. All these activities are beneficial for the development of the baby.

moral education

Psychologist's advice to parents on raising a child 2-3 years old

Before the child reaches the age of 2–2.5 years, it is pointless to punish him. He still does not feel himself the culprit of the incident. He sees the result of his actions, but does not associate it with himself in any way, and does not realize how it happened. The only thing he will take away from punishment or censure is that he is bad and they do not like him.

Until a certain time, one must refrain from angry tirades and detailed explanations of how not to do it. The kid is still unable to understand them. At this stage, clear and reasonable restrictions and prohibitions are sufficient.

From about 2.5 years old, the child begins to feel himself, and he is already able to understand who is to blame for the incident. He realizes that some actions are good and please loved ones, while others are bad. But he is still learning to manage himself, and from time to time will continue to act contrary.

Often at this age, children have imaginary friends on whom they shift the responsibility for bad deeds. This allows the baby not to feel guilty about the misconduct. It is important to understand the motives of his behavior. To do this, you need to discuss the incident with the baby, and help correct the situation. This should be done in a calm, friendly tone, then he will not be afraid of punishment and will readily explain what motivated him.

At the age of three, children often behave badly, defining the boundaries of what is permitted and acting in spite of their parents. This gives them a sense of maturity and independence. If punished for misconduct, then instead of obedience, the baby will resist. It is important at this stage to show patience, over time, relations with the baby will improve.

A child at the age of 3 years is a serious test for his parents. He has already noticeably grown up, began to speak and actively express his aspirations. At some point, the child's behavior begins to change, from an obedient baby he turns into an unbearable boy who may refuse to go for a walk with his mother, pretend to be asleep, and suddenly begin to call names. In psychology, this age is called the "crisis of 3 years of age." The main thing is to remain calm and not panic, these are all temporary difficulties that all parents face, on whose shoulders the upbringing of a child has fallen.

Antics at 3 years old is one way to express protest

The baby begins to realize that he is a person who has his own desires and unique features.

It is for this reason that one can often hear from parents that education during this period turns into a struggle with stubbornness and negativism, this is partly true.

little stubborn

Negativism is a characteristic feature of the crisis of 3 years of age. This attitude is expressed towards the requests of an adult and his personal person. Often this attitude of the child is manifested only to one member of the family, while he obeys the others. This feature also appears in order for a 3-year-old child to be able to force his parents to fulfill his requirements, showing his power with the help of aggression.

Crisis of 3 years - symptoms

Raising a baby in different families proceeds differently. Some parents also begin to react extremely negatively to the antics of their grown-up child, trying to show the little manipulator his place. They use pressure and physical force. In other families, obedience to the child is accepted, they fulfill any requirement, so long as he does not bother his parents over trifles. It is important to find a middle ground here in order to direct education in the right direction.

Tantrum at 3 years old - a way to state your opinion

Here are some helpful tips for parents raising a 3-year-old child:

• It is important to be patient, to assess each situation as soberly as possible. You need to understand the feeling of the baby, skillfully using his whims against him. For example, if a child refuses to clean up toys, cleverly scattering them on the floor, then you can ask him to never pick them up again.
• All prohibitions, strict requirements, whims have low efficiency, so you need to switch the child's attention to an activity that is more exciting and interesting for him.
• You should not react too violently to the boy's tantrums. You should not indulge any desire of the child, after which a series of tantrums follows. Otherwise, in a child of 3 years old, the habit of starting a tantrum for any reason may be fixed in the mind. You can easily divert the attention of a hysterical boy to an interesting little thing or toy.
• The upbringing of a 3-year-old baby should be completely the same, the father does not need to allow the child what the mother forbade, and, on the contrary, it is especially necessary to clearly explain these rules to the kindest grandparents.
• You need to educate a boy and a girl in an atmosphere of love, sincerely praise for good deeds. And if the child suddenly stumbled and did the wrong thing, you need to explain why you should not do this.

Manifestations of protest in 3 years

Real "male" education

It should be very important for a boy to realize that he is a man. He must understand that he is strong, brave and kind, just like dad. At the age of 3, a boy begins to actively imitate his father, he should feel comfortable next to his dad. Mom should understand this feature of the boy, giving men the opportunity to be together more often. They need to be given more free space because they are more active. It is important not to lower the boy's self-esteem, you should not use negative epithets: "coward", "weakling".

On the street you need to spend more time playing active games. For a 3-year-old boy, more independence should be given under vigilant parental control.

Obstinacy and self-will are more often shown by boys

A mother can teach a child to open the door, help carry a bag of groceries from the store, perform simple tasks, the baby will be happy with these innovations. It's nice to be helpful and needed.

A little advice for mom: in order to bring up the qualities inherent in a man in a boy, you sometimes need to pretend to be weak and helpless so that the child manifests himself.

Little princesses

A girl, unlike a boy, develops more intensively, her feelings and emotions become more acute. It is easier to contact girls, only here you need to take into account their cunning. Her mother acts as an ideal and an example for a girl, together they find many topics for conversation - a discussion of doll outfits, recipes for delicious pastries, care for indoor flowers. The role of the father in the upbringing of his daughter is to positively influence her communication with the opposite sex. It is necessary to constantly monitor the aspirations and capabilities of the daughter, to promote her maximum development.

Stubbornness - how it manifests itself

offended beauty

Parental education is a significant contribution to the development of their child, the character and attitude to the world around them depend on this contribution.

And if you do not start seriously raising a child from the age of 3 and after this period, otherwise there is always a chance to spoil your child completely. In any case, children should be brought up in a full-fledged family where love and harmony reign. The daughter should prepare for the future role of the mother, and see her loved one in the role of the father, and if there is no man in the family, then such a situation can be inherited. Spousal rejection and divorce are problems rooted in early childhood. You need to pick up your unique key for the girl, which will help open her heart to her parents, because trust in the family is the main thing.

Negativism is the main manifestation of the crisis of 3 years

Raising children after the age of three

After reaching the three-year age limit, tantrums can also continue, sometimes they are very similar to seizures. The fact is that after reaching the age of 3, the child continues to be mentally and physically dependent on the mother, which is why he does not let his mother go a single step, emotionally experiencing even a short-term separation. It is during this period that the boy actively absorbs information, it accumulates. Time moves inexorably forward, and the former little boy is no longer recognizable.

After 3 years, the child begins to actively explore the space, reaps the results of his activities, rejoices in the fact that he is able to influence this world around him.

For example, if you kick the ball hard, then it will roll further, if you cry for a long time, then they will definitely give you what you want.

Role-playing games at 3 years old - a favorite pastime

After the age of 3, a child begins to actively copy adults, trying on various roles. Role playing becomes his main activity. He also shows an increased interest in peers, begins to actively interact with them, play various games. His self-confidence is gradually growing, he begins to understand that he can do it, he knows that he is as big as mom and dad. He begins to feel like a separate person who does not understand, does not want to understand why he is constantly pulled up, many things are forbidden, everything is decided for him.

In simple words, the crisis of this age is manifested in the contradiction between the children's "I want" and "I can."

The desires of a 3-year-old baby do not always coincide with real possibilities, and on the other hand, he comes across guardianship from adults. In psychology, there are 7 signs of a crisis of 3 years of age: self-will, stubbornness, negativism, the appearance of obstinacy, rebelliousness, depreciation syndrome, pronounced despotism. How should parents behave in such a difficult situation so that their actions do not aggravate the situation?

Advice to parents - do not punish the baby

1. A child at this age tends to do everything on his own, although he has practically no skills for this. In this case, it is important for parents to allow the baby to do everything himself, even if they clearly understand that it will be difficult for him to do this. Personal experience is the best teacher. You need to be patient, watching his actions, you need to give him more time to complete this task than an adult spends on it. Do not forget to praise the baby when he succeeds, what a fine fellow he is, that you are proud that he has already grown up.
2. There are times when the child becomes stubborn, insisting on his request. He does this not because he wanted it so much, but because he made such a decision. The best solution in this case is to offer an alternative in return, without insisting, wait a few minutes, let the little stubborn man make his own decision.
3. Sometimes the baby acts contrary not only to the parental desire, but also to his own desire, because this is not his personal decision, but his parents ask him about it. Therefore, instead of the order: “Let's go for a walk!”, You can simply ask the baby about his personal desire: “Little, are we going for a walk today?”. Here you can apply a little trick by asking the baby a question, any answer to which will suit you completely. For example: “Will we go for a walk today in the alley or in the park?”
4. A riot on a ship is a kind of protest reaction to parental pressure, the stormy children's energy still comes out in the form of strong tantrums and outbursts of anger. Of course, this is a kind of relaxation, but along with it, the baby receives severe stress, which lowers the immune properties of the child's body. Therefore, when the baby went into hysterics, it is better to wait it out calmly, and then explain how to behave correctly in this situation, do not try to do this when the baby is hysterical, it is useless, these are the features of the fragile human psyche.

Hello my dear friends. Today, the topic that we will try to consider from all sides is raising a child for 3 4 years, psychology advice. And a provocative question. Tell me, are you satisfied with yourself as a parent? Are you sure you are doing everything right? And do you know where you lead when you carry out educational measures? And in general, do you know how to educate?

Think about these questions ... And I honestly confess to you. I am not always satisfied with myself. Sometimes, I understand what is right, but all the same, the results are not quite the ones I led to. And in the end, I'm back at the very beginning of the journey. Therefore, the experience of each participant in our conversation is invaluable. I would be grateful for comments.

First, let's talk about how wonderful this time is - 3-4 years! Let's look at it through the eyes of the baby and from the side of his parents. Then we will consider what tasks are facing adults who have a three-year-old toddler. And most importantly, we will learn how to properly relate to changes in the behavior of babies.

The best period for kids and their parents

3-4 years can be safely called the golden age. Children can already do a lot, which makes their parents incredibly happy: they talk, move independently, a lot and often repeat after adults, but already in many of their actions character and willpower appear, and their development has advanced quite a lot over the past six months, games are more like solving difficult problems. puzzles and they are all interesting.

This is the general picture. Naturally, babies are different, and the characteristics of babies, and their abilities at different levels. And yet, if we talk about this age, then the situation is approximately as follows. But there is something that is the same for all three-year-olds, this is their perception of the world, that we surround the baby. And at this time, the main thing is to understand what the needs of children are and how to satisfy them.

We will answer the same question from different points of view: what is this child like, and what kind of training should he be given in order to raise a quality person.

"Who am I?"

I invite you to become Mary Poppins for a moment to be able to understand the speech of children and their outlook on life.

From the very first moment, as soon as the baby opened her eyes in the morning, she saw the warm sun, the gentle smile of her mother, heard tender words. He was told how well he would have a day today. And, the only thing he understood was that his mother's voice is kind, which means that everything is fine in the family. He heard the key words: "eat", "walk", "Egor's friend", "dad". And in his head woke up one after another picture. From each of them he involuntarily becomes happy.

"Who is this little one?"

Let's look at the little man through the eyes of a parent. A new day begins. Let's drop all the hassle: feed, clothe, put to bed, etc. Let's leave what mother sets today for the goal - the upbringing of independence. Mom sees that the baby understands everything, reacts correctly to everything. Therefore, he decides to instill new knowledge and skills in the little one.

It is commendable when adults have a plan, a program according to which they work with children. But what is it based on? You have noticed that the kitten itself is full of emotions and feelings. He passes everything through the prism: good-bad. Another basis is and vision of the world in images and pictures.

Deciding to teach something to a three-year-old baby, you need to take this into account. That is, if you want to explain something, then you should resort not to logic and facts, but to feelings (pain, regret, fun, good) and qualities (brave, kind). Another of your lifesaver for parents in teaching their crumbs is sensory education (not only to speak, but also to give a try, use the baby's sensations and perceptions).

A little unusual, right? You may need to change something about yourself and your approach first, but it's worth it. And it will bear fruit very soon.

What you should never do is to think that the child is too small, and therefore it is not worth "spoiling" him with his upbringing. Or we will never be late, we will start when the little one goes to school. And now let him "rest" from moralizing. But is this position correct? Let's talk!

The value of quality education

What do you understand by education? Corner? Belt? moralizing? All this refers to punishment, and in no way corresponds to the intention to help. It is necessary to act in 3 directions: to teach, instruct and correct. What and how?

1. Moral. It is at this age, when one's feelings are so clear, that one can show that other people also have feelings. They can be upset and happy. So the baby begins to understand that he can act in someone's interests, take care of someone. This social moral training is the basis for raising a crumb to be a responsible and attentive person.
2. Ecological. It seems so difficult to explain to a little one that nature needs to be protected. After all, he does not understand what nature is, and how to protect it, and why to do it. But it is in 3-4 years that it is worth paying attention to the basics of environmental education. To do this, you need to use simple and understandable truths. For example, fish give us water to wash and drink. And if you take a lot of water, there will not be enough water for the fish. Pity the fish. This is how a girl or a boy in the first stages, thinking about the fish, will save water. He will grow up, and we will be able to supplement his knowledge.
3. Patriotic. How to explain to a toddler that this is his land, his homeland, country and people are his fellow citizens? This is also part of another instruction, spiritual and moral. Trust me, it's easy. Moreover, this pre-school “education” also includes a story about the traditions and customs of our country, and it cultivates respect for people, his compatriots. Guessed? Yes! This is reading. And the favorite books of the little one are folk tales! He will take all the necessary information from himself, like a sponge absorbs. You can only slightly mark the right moments to concentrate the attention of the crumbs.
4. Physical education. Probably, for our kids it will be the most favorite lesson. That's when they can jump and run to their heart's content. And our task is to direct their energy into the system. That is, show the exercises, and help them perform.
5. Labor. Even very small crumbs are able to do something on their own. Of course, this “something” should be so simple that the little one can master it. To do this, parents can prepare in advance, find a simple task and ask the kitten to do it. The kid will be happy!

Such multifaceted training can instill a respectful attitude towards people, respect for the Earth, pride in one's people and country, and instill useful habits and skills.

It remains only to find time for all this. And a little more for myself to rest.

Baby needs and how to meet them

What do you think is important in education? So that the baby obeys you in everything? You know, my experience tells me that there is absolutely no such thing and cannot be. Then what is important?

For me, this is understanding! I strive with all my might to understand my little one, to comprehend what his psychology of behavior is. And I hope that then it will be easier for him to understand me.

So, in any conflict, when the baby does not obey, I know for sure that there is a reason for this. I don't know her yet. But, if I can talk to the baby, I will definitely find out what's wrong. Then quarrels can be avoided. But what if the little one is psychotic and does not go to the meeting? Is it necessary to insist that he share his unfortunate misfortune?

Do not hurry. You need to wait until the little one cools down, and his sense of the situation will not be so sharp. That's when you can talk. An even better option is to discuss everything before going to bed, remembering what happened and what should have been done.

If the baby, even before going to bed, perceives the conversation too emotionally, then it is better to use it, in which the same conflict occurs with dinosaurs or dolls, any characters that your child really likes. And then he will listen with pleasure and absorb how they behave, how they resolve the conflict, take their model of behavior. Agree, we, adults, also sometimes do not like it when they say that we did wrong. In the case of a fairy tale, it seems that it’s not you who are doing it wrong, but the dinosaur. Thus, you remove the emotional block of information perception.

Do not forget that a trusting relationship with a child is built at this age. For a child to tell you about all his problems and conflicts during his school years, it is important

And one more important point that wise parents take into account when they instruct the baby. We will talk about the plane in which the child perceives any information.

Remember the classics. It is rightly said there, the baby is interested in "what is good and what is bad." That is, the baby’s view of the world is painted only in 2 colors: black and white. And there is not even a gray layer. It's too early for him to see other colors of the rainbow. But the fact that the little man so clearly captures the difference between good and evil can be used. It is easy to explain that he upset dad or mom, or made them happy with something, etc.

I will not talk about tantrums in this article, since we have already discussed this topic in a separate article:

It seems that I have named all the most basic principles. If you forgot something, or you have something to add to the article, write! Subscribe to blog news! And I'm always glad to see that the topic I raised is needed and interesting! So go to the blog, read and share with your friends!

Age from 3 to 6 years - very interesting and important period in a child's life. After all, right now the child is moving from the state of "the baby and mother are one" to the state of "I am a separate independent person." And although the independence of a three-year-old baby is still, of course, a rather arbitrary concept, but what baby changes and grows , we will not argue with this.

How exactly does this happen, which will help parents understand that their beloved baby has already embarked on the path of growing up?

Main signs of psychological development three year old baby

• the child realizes himself as a person and begins a psychological separation from the mother, it is with this factor that the age crisis of 3 years is associated.
• builds sentences using the prepositions "I", "you", "he", "she". Previously, the child used his name to describe actions, for example, he said “Masha went,” and now the baby says “I went.”
• is aware of his gender and consciously classifies himself as a boy or girl. During this period, role-playing games are typical for the child: with dolls in “daughter-mother” for girls, with cars, pistols and a soccer ball - for boys.

Consider the main moments of mental growth child from 3 to 6 years old.

Socialization

Starting from the age of three, the child begins the process of moving beyond his family circle and enters into the life of the baby active communication with peers . After all, it’s not for nothing that when a son or daughter turns three years old, many parents think that it’s time for the child to attend, enroll him in courses.

What gives the child full communication with peers, what he can learn during joint games:

• subordinate your desires to the general rules of the game;
• to form the essence of the concepts of "good" and "bad";
• get to know the emotions and behavior of other children;
• become more independent;
• learn something new.

AT ages 3 to 6 years, thanks to active socialization, the child gradually learns to evaluate the world around him, people, adequately perceive his own actions.

As the child ages changing storylines for games : if at the age of 3-4 years they were limited to imitation of adults, family, everyday plots and contained mainly objective actions (feeding a doll, driving a car, building a house out of cubes), then a child of 5-6 years old, as they grow up and master a new , draws attention to more complex points, such as human relationships.

Also, the game becomes longer in time:

• at 3-4 years old, a baby can enthusiastically engage in one thing for no more than 15 minutes, then he needs to switch to something else;
• at 4-5 years old, one game can last 20-30 minutes;
• at 5-6, the child is able to get carried away with the game for 30-40 minutes, and after some rest, return to it, if it is interesting.

Psychological features

At the age of 3 to 4 years the baby forms the concept of intonation of spoken words: the child is able to understand dissatisfaction with his behavior, resentment, irony, sadness by voice.

At this age, the child, basically, no longer confuses the singular and plural, feminine and masculine, knows how to divide objects into groups according to various criteria, but sometimes he can call yesterday tomorrow and vice versa, confuse the concepts of “lunch” and “dinner”. Also, the difficulty in the baby causes the need to understand the time by the clock.

Child open to new knowledge , is keenly interested in what this or that object is intended for and what can be done from it. Thanks to this interest, some kids take apart and sometimes break their toys in order to understand how they are arranged inside.

Independence and the desire to do everything exactly the way he wants is a rather acute topic at the age of 3-4 years. The parents of such a baby need to be patient and try to organize the child with the help of a constant daily routine and coherence of their actions, and also remember that despite all the protests, if the baby has any difficulties or feels tired, the little rebel, at least for time, but will definitely return to parental care.

In a child aged from 5 to 6 years quite developed, he easily memorizes poems, stories, lyrics. At this age, kids easily learn, quickly grasp new words, speak quite smartly. Also, the kid gradually learns to understand the causal relationships and relationships of things: he begins to compare and compare phenomena, highlight their essential features, operate with the concepts of “material”, “weight”, “number”.

At this age, the baby not only actively observes what is happening around, but also draws appropriate logical conclusions (for example, when in the mood, he can talk about “why do people go to work” or “why am I sad today”), repeats what he heard and saw from other children and adults.

Psychologist Natalya Karabuta tells:“Some parents, having sent their child to kindergarten after three years, think that now specialists will be involved in the development of the baby, and they will finally be able to relax. A dangerous delusion, because now a new important stage begins in the life of a baby - the first period of growing up. From how correctly in the period from 3 to 6 years the parents will build a system of education, it directly depends on how adequate the value system of the baby will be when he grows up. At this age, the child no longer takes the word of an adult - he believes his own eyes, does not obey orders, but requires adult trust, respect and cooperation. It is important for parents to learn how to build relationships with the child, to understand each other, to be on the same wavelength.