Ekaterina Morozova
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All parents at some time have to solve the problem of how to raise an obedient child. And the sooner they start raising their child, the better it will be for everyone.
A child who does not obey parents and teachers brings a lot of unpleasant worries , and not only to loved ones, but even to passers-by on the street. Those children who grew up in conditions of complete freedom cannot distinguish between what they are allowed to do and what they are not.
The process of education is a very long one. Therefore, if you want your child to only make you happy with his actions and behavior, and not upset you, then you should be patient .
Seven basic parenting secrets that will help you find mutual understanding with your offspring and tell you how to teach your child to be obedient:
- Be consistent in your upbringing. That is, if a ban was introduced on something, for example, not to leave the yard, or not to run out onto the roadway after the ball, then it must be observed every day, without giving concessions. Children are actually very good psychologists, and they will instantly understand where mom and dad are weak, and this also applies to the established rules. And, as soon as they feel this, they will begin to believe that it is not necessary to follow the rules; accordingly, all prohibitions can be violated. That is why it is necessary to teach a child to be obedient consistently.
- Be firm and at the same time gentle. As practice shows, it is very difficult to raise children with only one cry, and even more so with anger. To little man skills of obedience were developed, he must know that he is loved and punished not out of hatred, but out of love for him. Emphasize love, attention and affection, but be firm in your beliefs. This way you will show your child that you love him very much and know how he feels, but he will still have to follow the established rules.
- Be an example for your children. Many parents rack their brains over the question of how to make their child obedient, but they do not want to change their habits and established lifestyle. But they forget that a child does not perceive any moral teachings as much as the personal example of his parents. Research shows that children are very sensitive at a very early age. And therefore, they try to subconsciously imitate the closest adults whom they see every day and whom they trust most - their parents. And therefore, it is very important that parents behave as they should and become a good example for the child. Without exception, all the rules that are established for children must be impeccably followed by adults. For example, if the father smokes, then it will be very difficult to explain to the child why it is harmful and why this should not be done.
- Punish appropriately. Every year, children grow and constantly try to find new activities for themselves - thus finding out what is allowed to do and what is not. An appropriate punishment for the child’s misdeeds should be determined. For example, if a child has committed a minor offense, you don’t need to avoid talking to him for three days; it’s better to show that this is unpleasant for you. You can’t intimidate a child, it won’t do him any good. Just make it clear that all the rules set by the parents must be followed, otherwise there will be punishment. Read also:
- Develop a reward system. How to raise an obedient child - encourage him, noticing even the smallest victories and positive changes in his behavior. If your baby is obedient, not capricious, does not break the rules and fulfills your requirements, then encourage him in any way - with a kind word or praise. In this case, the child will have a good incentive to be obedient, he will know that he is acting correctly, and he will continue to act correctly, including to justify your trust. Children are especially pleased when their parents say they are proud of them. And - remember: this is the usual explanation for many adults: “That’s how it should be!” - It does not work! Take the time and effort to explain to your son or daughter in detail where this or that rule came from. And even if the child does not understand something, he will still not be harmful, because he will feel that you are interested in him. And most likely, he will ask himself if something is unclear.
- Reward your child correctly. Even for adults, rewards are a great incentive to work harder and more diligently. This also applies to children. In order for your child to behave obediently for a while, you can tell him in advance what awaits him. For example, this could be a trip to the cinema to see a new cartoon, to the zoo, new toys, sweets, access to computer games, etc. But to get it, he must fulfill your requirements. This method works well, however, do not abuse it, since the child will only be obedient for a “bribe” in the form of a nice gift.
- And finally - you must adhere to the chosen line of upbringing, think the same way with your spouse and all your grandparents, aunts and uncles. Otherwise, your offspring will take the bad fashion of manipulation. A husband and wife should support each other in everything, even if they think completely differently, or even if they are divorced. How to raise children must be agreed upon in their absence. A child will be obedient only if both mom and dad are the authority. Read also:
And remember - obedient child can only grow up in a family where he is loved and everything is done for his good!
How do you raise your child? Does everything work out in education, and what are the mistakes? Share your stories in the comments below!
Complete collection and description: prayer for the child to be calm for the spiritual life of a believer.
For the child to speak.
Angels live there
Your soul is protected.
Christ stands there
He's looking at you, child,
Say hello to him.
If you remain silent, he will forget you.
He'll be mad at me because of you
On the sea, on the ocean, the holy island lies,
The holy apostolic church stands on it.
In that holy church
The holy fire of forty holy candles is burning.
From the heat of those candles,
From entering one place of clouds,
From Elijah the Prophet His holy word will thunder,
The forest is noisy, aching and falling.
The holy island is washed away with water,
Sand covers the illness of God's servant (name),
Hides, buries forever.
He won’t groan, he won’t groan, he won’t groan.
No more grinding of teeth
And let all his illness sleep from my word
Until then, until then
The disease in God’s servant (name) will not wake up,
Until the holy island turns upside down.
My words from a sorcerer, from a witch,
From the medicine man-whisper, from the medicine woman-whisper.
Therefore, be the word, live my work.
The key is in the sea, the tongue is in the mouth.
There is no end to my word,
Just as there is no church without a dome and a crown.
She left the parka on Him.
Lord, bless, Lord, help!
In the name of the servant of God (name) baptized,
Handles, grow, get fat, become vigorous,
Feet, walk, wear your body white,
Baby's tongue, feed your little head.
Grandma Solomonyushka was floating,
The baby, the servant of God (name), rules,
She asked God for mercy for him.
Servant of God (name), don’t be a sedun, be a walker.
Bathhouse and water, listen,
And you, servant of God (name), eat plenty of milk.
Key, lock, tongue.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
Was walking Mother of God along the golden bridge.
Where are you going, Mother of God?
What are you carrying in your little hands?
I’m going to the servant of God (name) to treat my fear,
Remove the illness, reprimand it!
Go, you sick person, to a bad courtyard,
No grass grows there, no one lives there.
I have a golden cross in my hands,
My dear Son gave it to me -
Lord Jesus Christ
I say, He echoes:
“Go, you sick person, to a bad courtyard,
There you live, there you exist.”
And be, my words, strong,
And stand, my works, sculpting.
What I didn’t say, what I didn’t say,
The Mother of God will tell you, the Lord God will tell you.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen!
Everyone loves you, everyone honors you,
Everyone won't live long without you.
God gave you and punished you:
To nourish people and wash them of any dirt.
Wash, rinse, free from illness,
And you, Mother Mother of God, bless,
Help the servant of God (name):
For ease, for health, for God's mercy.
How God's water rips off the ridges,
It washes away from stumps, banks, roots,
So wash away, rinse off the water from God's servant (name)
All ailments and pains.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.
And to me - my child.
Like every creature, animal, every beast
Wants to feed his child,
To make your breasts swell with milk
And it was never empty. Amen.
Live healthy, be strong,
Fortunately, molded
He has a pretty face, like an angel.
Not crooked, not thin, not fat, not empty.
Take me away, Our Lady of Sorrows,
All the sorrows of an infant,
All the freaks are disgusting,
Any curvature, illness,
The mind is careless, the head is empty.
God affirmed the holiness of my medical affairs.
Holy One, confirm my medical words.
Mother of God, deliver me from all torment and sorrow.
So my stomach wouldn't hurt,
Didn’t walk, didn’t kill me with illness.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
To the health of God's servant (name),
For ease, for all kinds of trouble.
Fly to me yourself
No - so send the messengers,
His strengthening angels,
The heart needs calmers.
Jesus Christ, open three gates:
Some for peace, others for humility,
Third gate for blessing.
Bless, Lord, the heart of a mother,
So that it doesn't knock heavily,
The mother did not suffer from fear for her children,
I fell asleep peacefully in the evening,
I didn’t get up energized in the morning.
The sea stands in an open field,
This sea is never swept away:
Not in autumn, not in winter, not in summer and not in spring.
There is eternal peace at sea.
In winter the sea does not sweep away,
Doesn't disappear in autumn
In spring it does not flow away with streams.
Everything in one place, everything in one measure.
There is calm peace on the sea,
The wind doesn't rustle there, the waves don't rage there,
So it is with the servant of God (name)
My heart doesn't hurt for my children,
Doesn't burn, doesn't moan,
He won’t get tired, won’t shout or even make a peep.
May you, my words, be just as strong,
How strong is the Alatyr stone,
Sculpted and tenacious and not dissuaded.
Amen to my words, amen to my deeds.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Now and ever and unto ages of ages.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
For every prayer, for meekness and patience,
For any craft, for household work:
For plowing in the field, mowing, threshing;
Carry it up the mountain, take it down the mountain,
Build, dig, knit sheaves, remove dirt,
Wash clothes, pick mushrooms, berries,
Ferment, salt, paint, whiten,
Stab, chop, saw, chisel,
Maintain the posts and bring the spoils to the house.
And you, laziness of God’s servant (name), go to the old stump,
You will live there forever,
You will always be there
To forever lag behind God's servant (name).
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.
Show us Your mercy.
Bless the servant of God (name).
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
So all the nonsense from God’s servant (name) would go away.
Prayer for the child to sleep well and peacefully
Every loving mother wishes her baby a restful sleep. Knowledgeable people recommend reading prayers at the head of the crib.
The words are addressed to the Guardian Angel or the Lord. Even when the baby’s sleep is sound, prayer is still needed so that the child sleeps well, so that his dreams are pleasant.
It is advisable to teach your child to pray with early age. Knowledgeable people believe that pure, good thoughts and desires will please the Lord, and he will want to take the child under his protection. Instill sincere faith in the heart of a child, so that even in mature age God's help accompanied him. Then he will live happy life without knowing grief.
The mother is concerned that the child sleeps well. Sometimes restless sleep is the consequence of an illness that requires serious medical supervision. However, sometimes it is impossible to establish the reason why the baby is furious and does not sleep. Then the healers claim that the child is tormented by demons. To save a child from violence, it is necessary to read a prayer service every day as he falls asleep.
Prayer is the best solution to problems. The child’s psyche is excessively weak, and therefore constantly requires spiritual protection. The Lord gives such protection.
The holy word works better on the baptized. However, it is worth considering that even if the child is baptized, it is necessary for the parents to live according to the commandments of God in order to ensure protection for the baby.
Faith and calm
Any prayer is learned by heart. Read, being in a calm state and wishing for the fulfillment of your plans. If you have doubts about the power of words, it is better not to read. Holy word should be pronounced when you believe in the action and help of the One to whom it is addressed.
Be sure to ask for forgiveness for your sins. The baby is connected to his mother, and therefore her behavior directly affects his well-being. A prayer said with repentance for one’s bad thoughts and intentions to correct bad actions will certainly have an effect.
After such a prayer, children will try to behave well.
Say the prayer in a whisper, quietly whispering the words in your ear. They protect you from nightmares. Some mothers and grandmothers wash their children with holy water at night.
Pray for children's sleep upcoming
Many appeals to the Lord are made before or during the child’s sleep. They are aimed at ensuring that he sleeps peacefully, he only dreams good dreams and he remained happy. The following proven words, used by many, are recommended:
Prayer for the child to sleep well, to Jesus Christ. Gives a good, healthy, sound sleep to the child. Read over the baby's cradle.
Prayer for the child to sleep peacefully, to the Most Holy Theotokos and the Lord. Grants the acquisition of the blessing of the Lord and a restful sleep.
Prayer for infant sleep to the Lord. It can help cleanse the soul of filth, save and preserve, and grant restful sleep.
Read even a prayer that you came up with yourself. The main thing to remember when addressing the Saints is that faith must be present in your words. Only then should you count on an effective result.
Popular prayers for children:
Prayers for the baby to sleep: comments
One comment
A strong prayer for the child to sleep well and peacefully
A peacefully sleeping baby is the greatest benefit for parents. After all, a child snoring peacefully in his crib evokes tenderness, which indicates his normal health and development. Ask our Lord for blessings and mercy for your children, may he keep them in good sleep. A prayer for the child to sleep well will call on the Holy Spirit and entrust the baby to the guardian Angel.
The benefits and necessity of prayer before bed
The average baby's sleep can be disrupted due to several reasons. These include digestive problems, overwork from daily activity, and overexcitation from all sorts of impressions. Night is the time when you need to rest quietly, and the child experiences processes of nervous satiety. This may include a negative factor such as fear from any event. The cause may be an animal, a person, or simply a loud sound, which is deposited in the child’s consciousness, reflected in a restless dream.
- Praying before bed can calm a tomboy. The mother’s affectionate, radiating kindness voice gives the child a feeling of security. And the Heavenly Father, sending his grace to those who pray, will give the Guardian Angel instructions to protect the child’s sleep.
- In addition, learning prayers from infancy allows children to grow up in piety and respect for their parents, who showed the way to Christ and the Holy Heavenly Patron.
- A child, in whose life God is present from the very beginning, understands the seriousness of faith in his life, learns in time to separate good and evil, and grows up courteous to his parents and the Almighty.
- For people who have accepted Christ into their hearts and know how to ask forgiveness in prayer for voluntary or involuntary sins, the Creator opens all happy roads, protecting them from trouble.
Dangerous symptoms of the evil eye or severe fright
The most common and dangerous cause sleep disturbances in children is the invasion of demonic entities into a person’s life - the evil eye. We are all familiar with this phenomenon, which occurs from an involuntary envious glance. The frustrating thing is that a baby who has not strengthened his ability to protect himself from a crooked eye very often becomes a victim of it.
The evil eye is an invasion of the aura of a child of devilish influence. It is possible to fight it only with the word of prayer, which Jesus and the holy saints commanded. The Orthodox Church strongly condemns the resort to pagan conspiracies as a manifestation of the same demonic behavior from which we save our children. But turning to the Holy Spirit and Guardian Angel to make children’s sleep peaceful is strongly approved and welcomed.
Signs of fear or the evil eye in a child:
- Inability and inability to sleep normally at night until the morning.
- Dreams are full of nightmares and fears.
- Whims, crying and inability to sleep.
- The child suffers from seizures nervous breakdown and enuresis.
- The children's room seems to the child full of fears and monsters. (Up to the age of seven, a child is able to see demons that are invisible to adults)
- Infantile seizures, epilepsy, convulsions.
Important! If left unhealed before age seven, the evil eye can cause chronic health problems. If you notice signs of the evil eye or fear, do not dismiss the problem indifferently. Attract the power of the Almighty and your zeal in prayer, then the night will pass peacefully, and the child’s health will be freed from the terrible consequences that can happen from this misfortune.
Prayers to the Mother of God for a peaceful sleep for babies
Prayer has mass positive qualities– her words give us peace of mind and remove the negative impact of any negative factor. It is difficult to overestimate the effect it has on a child’s sleep. Especially if the child is under seven years old, parents should take care of him in every possible way and protect him from adversity and worries with their prayer, attracting the mercy of the Mother of God to protect their child. Fervently pray to her for protection over the baby at night, so that the Queen of Heaven will be given power over your child.
- You need to read the prayer to the Mother of God out loud three times, laying your hands on the child. Her protection and grace will descend with a parental embrace and fill the child with heavenly blessing.
- If your baby is acting too excited, give him holy water to drink. A few sips of Epiphany water can do a miracle - they remove the evil eye, fear or other negative factor.
“O Most Holy Lady Virgin Theotokos, save and preserve under Your shelter my children (names), all youths, young women and infants, baptized and nameless and carried in their mother’s womb. Cover them with the robe of Your motherhood, keep them in the fear of God and in obedience to their parents, pray to my Lord and Your Son to grant them what is useful for their salvation. I entrust them to Your maternal supervision, for You are the Divine Protection of Your servants.
Mother of God, introduce me to the image of Your heavenly motherhood. Heal the mental and physical wounds of my children (names) caused by my sins. I entrust my child entirely to my Lord Jesus Christ and Your, Most Pure, heavenly protection. Amen"
Evening prayer to the Guardian Angel
If a child is experiencing the consequences of fright or is tormented by fears, then it is best to call on the Guardian Angel. The Lord entrusts him with guardianship over a person’s earthly life - that’s why it is important that the sacrament of baptism be performed as early as possible. For, without giving the child under God’s blessing, we do not allow the Guardian Angel to become the guide and guardian of our little blood.
Read the prayer with your child before going to bed. While he is little, your concern is to read to him at night words addressed to his Guardian Angel - our intercessor and guardian. Over time and growing up, the child himself will begin to pray, protecting his life from troubles and calling on the Angel to help on his earthly journey.
- When the child lies down in bed, be sure to offer a personal prayer to the saint in whose name the child of God was baptized.
- If you notice signs of fear or the evil eye, read the Psalm with the appropriate counteraction.
- At the end, a prayer to the Guardian Angel is read, also three times. She blesses the child and places his sleep in the caring hands of God's Power.
“Angel of God, my holy guardian, given to me from God from heaven for my protection! I diligently pray to you: enlighten me today, save me from all evil, guide me to good deeds, and direct me on the path of salvation.
Holy Guardian Angel of my children (names), cover them with your protection from the arrows of the demon, from the eyes of the seducer, and keep their hearts in angelic purity. Amen"
Appeal to the Seven Youths of Ephesus - peace and care for your child’s sleep
One of the most powerful prayers that ensures the peace of a child in dreams is the one that calls on the Seven Saints of Ephesus. This prayer is recognized as canonical and life-giving for those people who suffer from insomnia. Its great ability to have a calming effect on a child’s sleep is especially noted.
If a child suffers from a sleep disorder, and the mother, having tried all means, does not know what to do and where to look for help, use the power of the holy word of prayer, as the holy fathers recommend Orthodox Church. In popular rumor, the Seven Youths from Ephesus are also credited with the miracle of returning the lost sleep to the foolish child and to every servant of God.
- First, the “Our Father” is read three times, as an obligatory canonical prayer.
- Next they cry out to the Seven Youths of Ephesus for the granting of rest for the sleepless child.
- The prayer is read exclusively at night.
- When the baby falls asleep, cross his forehead with your fingers to give your parental blessing.
- At the head of the crib, keep an icon dedicated to the seven young men from Ephesus. Its action will be similar to the prayer to these saints - it will take care of the child’s peace of mind and protect them in dreams from demonic invasion.
“Oh, the most wonderful holy seventh day of the seventh generation, the praise of the city of Ephesus and the hope of the whole universe! Look from the heights of heavenly glory at us, who honor your memory with love, especially at the Christian infants, entrusted to your intercession by their parents: bring down upon her the blessing of Christ God, saying: leave the children to come to Me: heal the sick in them, comfort the sorrowful; Keep their hearts pure, fill them with meekness, and in the soil of their hearts plant and strengthen the seed of the confession of God, so that they may grow to the best of their ability; and all of us, who stand before your holy icon, kissing your relics with faith and praying warmly to you, vouchsafe to enhance the Kingdom of Heaven and glorify there with silent voices of joy the magnificent name of the Most Holy Trinity, the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit forever and ever. Amen"
The importance of Christian child baptism
One condition that must be met before you want to apply miraculous power prayers - every Orthodox soul must be baptized. For a child who, due to the parents’ oversight or their lack of understanding of the importance of the action, the sacrament of baptism was not performed, the prayer will not have an effect. At the same time, an unbaptized child is an easy prey for all demonic evil spirits.
Remember that having received a name at baptism, a child receives his heavenly mentors, leading him along the earthly path. Prayers for salvation from all misfortunes can now be offered to the Guardian Angel and to the holy saint by whose name the baptized person was named. They will be guardians for this child and answer before God for guiding him along the righteous path - the Christian one.
Psalter to help parents
As in other everyday situations, the problems of sleep disturbance in a child can be solved with the help of the psalms indicated by God. Every difficult everyday misfortune has its own beneficial verse from the songs of David. If you notice features in your child that may be a problem for his dreams, add reading the corresponding psalm to your prayers.
- Psalm 9 – from nightmares and the appearance of demons in dreams.
- Psalm 13 - if a child complains of fears.
- Psalm 90 - so that the child does not wet himself or cry at night.
- Psalm 121 – when there are signs of the evil eye.
- Psalm 7 – if a child suffers after being frightened by a person.
- Psalm 27 is about calming a child if he is behaving too restlessly.
- Psalm 63 – from fear, if the problem of falling asleep is acquired as a result of animal bites.
- Psalm 108 - a request to heal a sleepwalker.
Do not leave your child in the throes of falling asleep; the word of God, spoken by a kind mother, a caring parent, will certainly have healing power against any misfortune. Pray to God to grant your child peaceful dreams, and your prayers will be heard by the merciful and caring Heavenly Father.
Involve your child in prayer every time you yourself pay tribute to the Almighty. . However, there is no better medicine than prayer, which will restore peace and serenity to sleep.
Each child at birth has his own genetic code, which affects his character, so be that as it may, you will not be able to completely control the development and formation of the baby’s personality.
It often happens that no matter how the parents behave with the baby, no matter how calm and kind they are to him, the child is still constantly mischievous and capricious, not giving mom and dad the opportunity to relax.
What determines a child’s restlessness and how to make him calmer?
Often mothers look for the answer to this question by going to a psychological forum and re-reading all the thoughts on this matter. And this makes a certain sense.
Psychologists say that crying baby- this is a reflection of the internal state of his mother or father. Children are very sensitive by nature and are able to feel things that adults cannot. Therefore, it often happens that when one of the family members has troubles, the child also becomes restless. Even if outwardly adults do not give themselves away. Therefore, first of all, you need to take care of your inner state, put aside anxiety and worry, and go into the room with your baby extremely peaceful and calm.
Another thing that is very important is parental humility. Understand that your child may just be hyperactive, which is what causes this anxiety. Give your baby the opportunity to spend his energy on some games and others. interesting activities, and then at other times he will be more flexible. As for understanding, it is necessary here in order not to try to change the child. He is the way he is and he needs to be raised that way, without trying to change him in his own way.
The reason for the lack of calm may also be health problems. Take him to the doctor to check his condition internal organs, Special attention focusing on the intestines.
There can actually be quite a lot of reasons, The main thing is not to be nervous and force the child to behave calmly, this will only worsen the situation.
The usual practice of a mother caressing, cuddling and drying her baby does not require much comment, but it is quite revealing how she holds the baby when she is resting. Careful research by American scientists has shown that 80% of mothers place their baby on their left arm and press it to the left side of their body. When asked about the significance of this preference, most people answer that this is obviously due to the fact that right-handers predominate among the population. Holding the baby in her left hand, the mother releases right hand. However, a detailed analysis shows that this is not the case.
True, there is a difference between right-handed and left-handed women, but it is too small to explain this fact. It turns out that 83% of right-handed mothers hold their baby on the left side, but so do 78% of left-handed mothers. In other words, only 22% of left-handed mothers free their left hand. There must probably be some other, less obvious explanation.
The only reason is the fact that the heart is on the left side. Isn't the beating of a mother's heart vital? important factor? And if so, why? Pondering this question, scientists argued that perhaps the growing embryo acquired imprinting during intrauterine life. (imprinting, from the English imprint - leave a mark, capture, record) to the mother's heartbeat. If so, hearing a familiar sound again after birth can have a calming effect on the baby, especially if he finds himself in an unfamiliar and frighteningly new world. If this is so, then the mother, either instinctively or through trial and error, came to the discovery that her child behaves calmer when he is held on the left side, near the heart.
The conclusion may not seem very convincing, but tests conducted indicate that this is the correct explanation. Several groups of newborn babies in the delivery room listened for a long time to a recording of their heartbeat at a standard rate of 72 beats per minute. There were nine infants in each group, and one or more infants were found to cry 60% of the time when the recording was not on. However, this figure dropped to 38% when heartbeats were heard. In addition, the groups that listened to the recording increased their weight more markedly than the other infants, even though both received the same amount of food. It is clear that the groups who did not listen to the recording spent more energy when they cried loudly.
Another test was carried out on older children before they went to bed. For some groups, the bedroom was quiet, while for others, recordings of lullabies were played. For the third, a metronome was turned on, operating at a heart rate of 72 beats per minute. For the fourth groups, a recording of the heartbeat was included. Then they checked which groups fell asleep faster. Those groups that listened to a recording of a heartbeat fell asleep twice as much faster than anyone from other groups. This not only supports the hypothesis that the sound of a beating heart is a powerful sedative, but also indicates that the response to it is extremely specific. Imitating your heartbeat using a metronome doesn't work, at least not when it comes to babies.
It seems to us quite acceptable to explain the fact that mothers hold their babies on the left side. It is interesting to note that, having studied 466 paintings depicting the Mother of God with the Child (created over several centuries), it was established that on 373 of them the Child is on the left side. And in this case the figure is 80%. This contradicts the observation that 50% of women carrying luggage hold it in their left hand and the same percentage in their right.
What others possible consequences can have this imprinting on the heartbeat? For example, it may explain why we believe that feelings of love originate in the heart and not in the head. As the song says: “I have a heart, and my heart has a song!” This imprinting may also explain why mothers rock their babies to sleep. Their movements coincide in rhythm with the heart rate. Perhaps they remind the baby of the familiar rhythmic pulsations that he felt while in the womb, whose big heart was beating somewhere above.
And that is not all. The mentioned phenomenon accompanies us in adult life. Suffering, we rock back and forth. When we conflict with someone, we do the same. Next time you see any lecturer or speaker, check the frequency of his swaying. The embarrassment he feels in the presence large number listeners, forces him to make movements that calm him down, and therefore he resorts to the usual rhythm - an echo of the mother's womb.
Whenever you feel insecure, you find a calming heartbeat rhythm that takes one form or another. It is no coincidence that folk music and dances are usually performed in syncopated rhythms. Sounds and body movements return performers to the secure world of the mother's womb.
Some mothers suffer unbearably in the first three months of a baby's life, who cries continuously. And no amount of parental effort seems to be able to stop this flow of tears. They usually come to the conclusion that the child has some kind of physical defect and try to treat him accordingly.
Of course, they are right: this physical defect is indeed present; but this is rather a consequence rather than a cause. The following fact can help to understand the problem: the incessant crying of a child stops, as if by magic, in the third or fourth month of the baby’s life. It stops at the very moment when the child begins to recognize his mother as a person.
The answer to the question can be given by comparing the behavior of mothers of crybabies with the behavior of parents of calmer babies. The first ones tend to experiment, are nervous and restless when communicating with the baby. The latter are reasonable, self-confident and serene. The fact is that even at such a tender age, a baby perfectly distinguishes the touch of reliable hands that inspire confidence from the touch of hands that cause a feeling of uncertainty and anxiety. An excited mother unwittingly transfers her condition to her newborn. He immediately reacts accordingly, demanding that he be protected from the cause of the excitement. This only increases the mother's anxiety, which in turn only increases the baby's crying.
In the end, the child falls ill, and physical suffering is added to all his moral suffering. To break this vicious circle, one thing is required: the mother must come to terms with the situation and calm down.
When we are born, we find ourselves more helpless. Not only do we not have enough strength to cling to our mother, but we also have nothing to cling to. Deprived mechanical methods To ensure close contact with the parent, we must rely on our ability to evoke her reaction. We can scream until we burst just to get her attention. However, having achieved our goal, we must somehow secure this attention. A baby chimpanzee, just like us, screams, demanding attention. The mother immediately rushes to the baby and takes him in her arms. Her cub will cling to her fur again. In such a situation, we need some kind of replacement for such a gesture, some kind of signal that will reward the parent and force her to stay with us. A smile is such a signal.
The baby smiles in the first weeks after birth. However, it should be noted that this smile is addressless. Approximately in the first week, it becomes a response to one or another influence. A baby's eyes can fixate on certain objects. At first, he reacts most vividly to a pair of eyes staring at him. Even two black spots on a piece of cardboard will do. After a few weeks you will need your mouth too. Two black spots and a line below them representing a mouth will most effectively provoke a reaction from the baby. It soon becomes important that the mouth opens, and then the eyes begin to lose their importance as key stimuli. At this stage, around three or four months, the baby's response becomes more specific. Now he reacts not to any adult’s face, but to the specific face of his mother. The process of imprinting occurs.
And here's what's surprising. During this imprinting process, the child is unable to distinguish between squares, triangles, or other sharp-angled geometric figures. But he is able to recognize objects that remind him of features human face. Thanks to this, the baby’s vision is fixed on the necessary objects, and imprinting on some inanimate object nearby will not occur.
By seven months, the image of the mother is completely imprinted in the baby’s mind. No matter what she does now, this image will remain with him until the end of his life. Ducklings learn this image by following their mother duck, and baby monkeys by clinging to their mother. The child's attachment to the parent is strengthened with the help of a smile.
A smile, as a vital stimulus, acquires its unique configuration very in a simple way: we raise the corners of our lips. The mouth opens a little, the lips are pulled back - just like when expressing fear, however, due to the fact that their corners are bent upward, the nature of the expression changes radically. If the line of the lips takes on a different shape and their corners droop, then a kind of “anti-smile” appears. Just as laughter arose from crying, and a smile from laughter, so an unfriendly expression on the face, as if a pendulum was swinging in reverse side, is created from an expression of friendliness.
But a smile is not only about the line of the lips. As adults, we are able to express our mood with the curl of our lips, but this is not enough for a child. He not only smiles with all his might, but also kicks his legs, waves his arms, stretching them towards the object that caused his reaction, coos something, throws back his head, sticks out his chin, puts his torso forward or falls on his side, while breathing deeply. His little eyes are brightened up, they are slightly squinted, wrinkles appear under or around the eyes, sometimes on the bridge of his nose. The fold from the wings of the nose to the corners of the lips becomes more noticeable, the child may stick out his tongue slightly. Judging by the movements of the baby's body, he is trying with all his might to establish contact with his mother. For all its clumsiness, the child seems to show us everything that remains of the primitive reaction characteristic of primates - the desire to cling to the mother.
I have talked a lot about a child's smile, but a smile, of course, is a signal of double action. When a child smiles at his mother, she smiles back at him. Each of them rewards the other, and the mutual connection between them is strengthened. You might think this goes without saying, but there may be a catch. Some mothers, in a state of excitement, anxiety and irritation, try to hide their mood under a smile. They hope that the mask they wear will prevent the child from becoming upset. But in reality, this technique can do more harm than good. I have already noted that it is almost impossible to deceive a baby as to the mood of its mother. In early childhood, we are very susceptible to the slightest signs of her excitement or calmness. In the preverbal period, before the powerful machine of symbolic cultural information has time to attack us, we rely much more on subtle movements, changes in posture, and tone of voice than we will need in later life.
Other animal species have been particularly successful at this. The amazing ability of "Clever Hans", the famous horse who could count, was essentially based on his ability to notice the slightest changes in the trainer's posture. When he was asked to add up a certain amount, Hans would clatter his hooves the required number of times and then stop. Even when the trainer left the room and someone else took his place, the trick still worked, because after the required number of blows had sounded, the stranger involuntarily tensed, albeit imperceptibly, with his whole body. We all have this ability, even adults (this property is successfully used by soothsayers, who immediately determine when they are on the right track), but in children who cannot yet speak, this ability is especially developed. If a mother makes sudden movements in irritation, then no matter how hard she tries to hide her mood, the child will notice. If at the same time she decides to smile widely, she will not deceive the baby, but will only confuse him. After all, he perceives two contradictory signals. If this is repeated often, it will cause irreparable damage to the child, and in later life he will have serious difficulties in establishing social contacts and adapting to the environment.
Leaving the problem of the smile aside, let's move on to a completely different phenomenon. After a few months, the baby develops the new kind behavior: he becomes aggressive. The previous roar for any reason is replaced by outbursts of anger and angry crying. The child signals his aggressiveness by screaming abruptly, frantically waving his arms and kicking his legs. He attacks small objects, shakes large ones, spits, tries to bite, scratch and hit anyone nearby. At first, this kind of action is spontaneous and uncoordinated. Crying indicates that fear is still present. Aggression has not yet turned into outright aggression: this will happen later, when the child becomes self-confident and fully aware of his physical capabilities. When his desire to attack someone finally matures, this will be reflected in the form of special signals. The mouth is tightly compressed, the eyes are burning. Instead of lips there is a straight line, the corners of the mouth are lowered. The eyes are constantly looking at the enemy, the eyebrows are furrowed. Fists clenched. The child began to assert himself.
It has been established that as the group of children increases, their aggressiveness increases. In crowded conditions, friendly relations between group members worsen, cases of destructive and aggressive behavior. This is significant if we remember that collisions in other animals are aimed not only at identifying primacy, but also at expanding the living space of representatives of a given species.
With the arrival of the baby, young parents mentally prepare for sleepless nights. But why, if you can just learn how to put your baby to sleep correctly? Let's find out what affects night sleep baby, and what needs to be done to make it long and strong.
After a tiring day, children need rest. They restore strength during night sleep, which should be sound and long: at least 6-8 hours. A well-rested baby always has good mood, he is cheerful and physically active. What can parents do when putting their child to bed to improve the quality of sleep?
Note to moms!
Hello girls) I didn’t think that the problem of stretch marks would affect me too, and I’ll also write about it))) But there’s nowhere to go, so I’m writing here: How did I get rid of stretch marks after childbirth? I will be very glad if my method helps you too...
There are 7 secrets that will help your baby sleep soundly throughout the night:
- Before bed - only quiet games. 2-3 hours before bedtime, avoid high physical and emotional stress. They overstimulate the child’s nervous system, and he will not be able to fall asleep. Talk about this with the young dad if, when he comes home from work, he plays overly active games with the baby, whom he missed a lot during the day.
- Ritual before every night's sleep. This should be several events that take place before the rest strictly in the established sequence. They develop the habit of going to bed at the same time. Certain signs will tell your baby that it’s time to go to bed. U special. It may include a light snack, watching a cartoon, bathing, changing a diaper, changing into pajamas, fairy tales or lullabies, etc.
- Bathing and massage. Water treatments in the evening they calm the child down. Warm water relaxes the body, and the murmur and splash of water relaxes the nervous system. Excessive activity while swimming is not necessary. There should be only clean water in the bathroom; avoid using herbs and hard soaps: these products sometimes irritate the skin. If necessary, you can wash your baby with baby gel. After bathing, gently stroke his back and head. Mom and Dad's touch always has a calming effect, which additionally induces sleep.
- Room conditions. The main components of the microclimate that affect healthy sleep are temperature and humidity. Optimal air temperature for children. Humidity can range from 40–65%. Such conditions have a beneficial effect on growth and development, so it is advisable to maintain them around the clock.
- Sleeping area. A child can sleep in a crib, cradle, stroller or even. It depends on what you are comfortable with. But the following requirements are imposed on the baby’s sleeping place: the mattress must be even and hard. In the first months of life, babies do not need a pillow, and if room conditions are met, then a blanket too. Children's bedding should be natural. There should be no foreign objects that distract attention nearby.
- Feeding. The duration of sleep will directly depend on how well the baby ate before him. In order for him to have a thorough meal before resting, you can even underfeed him a little at the previous feeding. Then by night he will eat more intensely. The food should be light, it cannot be complementary foods. Then uninterrupted sleep for 6–8 hours is ensured. But this only applies to children over 6 months old. It is at this age that the need for night feeding disappears. Until this moment, you cannot deny your child milk or formula: he may wake up 1-2 times at night to eat.
- . The soundness and duration of sleep is adversely affected by the feeling of irritation and wetness. If the baby is dry and warm, then he will sleep peacefully.
Getting used to a new daily routine is not easy for new parents. But once you understand these seven simple secrets, you will immediately see how sound and long the sleep of a baby who is not disturbed by anything can be.
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