Your best friend has decided to get married and invites you to be a witness at the wedding? As a guest during the wedding celebration, have you had the opportunity to observe the actions of witnesses, but you are not entirely confident in your knowledge of what a witness should do at a wedding? This usually happens. But if you have had such an honor, you cannot let your friend down, so you need to clearly understand the responsibilities of a witness and act.
Wedding witness duties
What should a witness do at a wedding – relax or work? Get ready to be in charge of preparing and hosting the bachelor party. Usually the bachelor party is held the day before or 2-3 days before the wedding. Your friend is saying goodbye to single life, you must organize unforgettable experience from that day. Serious preparations await:
- Take care of the bachelor party scenario in advance.
- The future newlywed should not know anything about the program; the party is a surprise for him.
- Invite the groom's best friends, unknown women, girls to the bachelor party, drink, have fun to your heart's content.
Hold such a party so that by the morning your friend, exhaling, says: “I've had enough fun! I want to get married soon!” Do not forget that by the wedding day the witness and the groom should have a good rest and sleep, because the main thing is not the bachelor party, but the wedding. Both of you will have a lot of trouble, because the wedding day is full of pleasant events, competitions, and tasks. How much does a bride price cost?
What a witness should do at a wedding will certainly look beautiful and relaxed. Remember where the nearest flower shop is - you will have to go there with a friend to choose bouquets for the bride and bridesmaid. Show your generosity and subtle taste.
The appearance of the witness should correspond to the general style of the wedding, but still, the outfit is selected to taste:
- This could be a classic black suit with a white shirt and tie.
- The suit will also look quite solemn white, A suitable accessory will become a bow tie.
- Considering that the main thing a witness should do at a wedding is to participate in competitions and other entertainment, it is most practical to choose a dark-colored suit, and match the color of the suit with shoes.
The outfit should be beautiful and elegant, because the witness is the second person after the groom. And the presence of a charming witness nearby obliges you to look excellent.
Don't forget that the witness is right hand, support and support for the groom. He simply must be the most cheerful, inventive, know exactly what witnesses at weddings should do, master wedding customs, traditions. Your responsible mission is to ensure that everything goes according to plan, it begins with the preparation of the bachelor party and ends with the departure of the last guest from the wedding.
On your wedding day
On the wedding day, the witness needs to come early to a friend’s house to help him get dressed and get ready for the wedding. Try not to be embarrassed or forget anything necessary for the ceremony; it’s better to make a list in advance. Keep your passport with you wedding rings, bouquets for the bride and groom. Find out what they will sprinkle on the newlyweds after leaving the registry office: for example, rose petals, coins, grain - take it with you. Be sure to remind guests to decorate their cars with wedding ribbons.
If you remember at least a little from your experience what a witness should do at a wedding, then you have an idea about the bride price procedure. You will have to literally endure such a procedure on your shoulders. Be sure to take money with you, preferably in different bills, small and larger - brides are not cheap these days. You will also need several bottles of champagne, wine, vodka, some fruit, sweets - this can play a role in the process of bribing harsh “sellers”.
Remember how to bargain, use all sorts of jokes and jokes that suit this occasion. Will help bribe the witness beautiful bouquet, chosen the day before. And most importantly, have courage, because they will mock you thoroughly before they hand the bride over to the groom. And when happy groom finally gets to your beloved, the wedding procession goes to the registry office, where new responsibilities await you.
At the registry office
You must arrive at the registry office 20 minutes before the start of marriage registration. The witness gives the passports to the institution's staff to have them stamped. He also checks the readiness of the photographer and videographer to work, because the ceremony must be captured. During the wedding ceremony, the witness stands next to the bride, trying not to step on her dress. Holds wedding rings, which he will later give to the newlyweds.
Together with the witness, this indispensable participant in the ceremony lays out the wedding towel at the right moment, which they witness the first joint step of the newlyweds. When the time comes, he opens a bottle of champagne and pours it young into wedding glasses, and also carefully takes flowers donated by guests from the hands of the newlyweds. When the solemn melody of Mendelssohn's march sounds, the witness hands out bags with rose petals, wheat or coins to the guests to sprinkle on the newlyweds when leaving the Wedding Palace.
Knowing what a witness should do at a wedding, you will become the first violin, the main organizer of all key events.
At the banquet
It would seem that the most important thing is already behind you, you can relax with delicious food. wedding table. But that was not the case... For the witness, everything is just beginning. Don’t even know what a witness should do at a wedding after the registry office? He will be the main assistant to the toastmaster, and in his absence, the leader. The witness makes toasts, invites guests, relatives, and parents of the young to speak. A professional presenter will tell you more about what tasks the groom's witness performs in the video.
Be prepared to actively participate in all events where you will not only have to participate and entertain people, but also involve guests in games and competitions.
And the most important thing is not to lose sight of the bride in this wedding chaos, because they will certainly want to steal her, then you will be in trouble: you will have to pay the ransom together with the groom.
During photography
On the eve of the wedding, you will need to travel with a friend along the route of walking and photography in order to note the time and roughly plan the day. After graduation wedding ceremony a good witness checks how the guests are provided with transport, whether there is enough space for everyone in cars and buses, and then reminds drivers of the route and its main stopping points. Take with you champagne, glasses necessary for photography - and off you go!
During photography, the witness helps the newlyweds choose good places for shooting, helps the photographer and cameraman. At the same time, the witness, like a real magician, distributes snacks to the hungry guests. He must keep track of time so that the newlyweds are not late for the banquet.
Actions at ransom
Bride ransom is an ancient Russian ritual, very fun and spectacular. The groom, a witness and guests come to the house of his betrothed, where they must pay a certain amount of money for her. Prepare for the ransom in advance: help your friend pack a bag with the necessary props, put good wine, sweets, apples and other things there that will help you negotiate with the “retinue” of the cruel witness. Don’t forget to bring money, because when the groom gives every penny, the witness will have to fork out the cash.
Get ready, along with the groom, to go through the most unimaginable tasks that his fiancée’s girlfriends will order you to complete; without this, they will definitely not give her to you.
For an example of how the bride ransom procedure takes place, see the video.
You will sing, dance, joke - this is the main thing a witness should do at a wedding. Have fun, laugh, charge everyone with positivity, this day should be remembered for a long time!
After the celebration
The witness plays his role until the last guest has left. When the newlyweds are already going to bed, he must help them collect flowers, gifts, and organize a beautiful farewell. Then continue the feast and fun for the remaining guests.
Being such an important person at the celebration and understanding exactly what the witness at the wedding should do, you will see that you clearly will not have to rest. How do you like this role? There are more responsibilities than rights, and you need to prepare thoroughly...
A wedding is a very troublesome affair: you need to have time to buy, organize and try not to lose sight of anything. The bride is traditionally assisted in these matters by a witness.
Usually, for this role the bride chooses the most responsible girlfriend, with a cheerful and resourceful character and, of course, unmarried, so that she becomes an indispensable assistant at such a responsible and important event as a wedding.
Wedding season is in full swing - it's time to talk about... duties of a witness at a wedding.
WEDDING PREPARATIONS
During the preparation for the wedding, the witness helps the bride:
Choose Wedding Dress(searching catalogues, going to salons, making a final decision);
- in the selection of all necessary wedding accessories;
- prepares a ransom script (this is often considered basic the duty of the witness, i.e. there may not be another, but it is the preparation and the ransom itself that is the direct responsibility of the “main girlfriend”);
- helps the bride not to forget anything (I advise you again - an irreplaceable thing when preparing for a wedding);
- supports in moments when “panic” rolls over the bride (oh, we won’t have time!), "doubts" (married? Is he my betrothed?), "depression" (he doesn't help at all in preparing for the wedding - maybe he doesn't love me??) and so on.
The witness is the main psychological support of the bride in the days of preparation for the wedding!
- the witness may be asked for help in other matters: decorating the hall for a banquet, wedding procession and buying souvenirs for guests;
- if a bachelorette party is planned, then it is the witness who becomes its main organizer;
- by the way, ribbons with the inscriptions “Witness” and “Witness”, which are worn after the ransom, are also the concern of the main bridesmaid.
And now the wedding day comes!
Any bride is very worried not only on the eve of the wedding, but also as soon as she opens her eyes on this wonderful day (if she managed to sleep due to excitement and final preparations). The witness should come to her in advance, help her put her appearance in order and try to encourage her friend so that she looks confident and irresistible.
RANSOM
By ancient traditions Before taking his future wife to the registry office, the groom must go through a series of tests, which are carefully thought out in the form of a ransom scenario by the witness.
She is the first to meet the groom on the threshold of the apartment and asks difficult tasks and tricky questions that should show how well the groom knows and understands the bride.
At the same time, it is important not to delay the ransom (and not be late for the registry office), not to upset anyone, but, on the contrary, to set the tone and give everyone a joyful mood, to infect everyone with joy and lightness, so that the day is a success! And, of course, don’t confuse the groom with your tricky questions and tasks; if necessary, even help him or make a joke out of an unfortunate mistake: after all, the “ransom” is a humorous ritual that should help relieve tension for everyone present, but not vice versa.
MARRIAGE REGISTRATION
The witness goes to the registry office in the same car with the bride.
If we talk about the “place of the witness” in photographs and “in general”, then she should be on the left side of the groom.
The witness puts her signature in the registration book at the wedding ceremony after the newlyweds.
At the end of the ceremony, the witness takes into her hands (do not forget to include the hands of the witness) all the bouquets and gifts that are presented to the young guests and relatives, congratulating them on their marriage. By the way, the witness congratulates the newlyweds immediately after the parents.
A good witness will take care of the documents of the bride and groom, taking responsibility for their safety, because immediately after the ceremony, the newlyweds may not even remember their first joint document - the Marriage Certificate.
In the “champagne room” at the registry office (if such is planned), the witness makes a toast to the newlyweds, then treats the guests to sweets prepared for champagne.
At the exit from the registry office (while the newlyweds have not yet left), the witness organizes the guests: distributes rice / coins / rose petals to shower those leaving, explains “how and when” this should be done; controls the availability of champagne and glasses for all guests, and, of course, for the young ones.
If a car ride is planned after the registry office, then the witnesses travel in the same car with the bride and groom, or the witness travels only with the witness, separately from other guests.
IN THE RESTAURANT
Traditionally, in the banquet hall, the witness sits next to the newlyweds. She should help the host in organizing the holiday and not refuse to participate in fun competitions and games. Therefore, it is very important that the witness is energetic and cheerful: after all, only a person with an active life position will be able to support the toastmaster and add an additional charge of vivacity to the general fun.
Preparing several toasts/congratulations in advance is very good idea: It’s better that they don’t come in handy (with a good presenter/toastmaster) than there will be an awkward pause.
Remember that the real witness conscientiously fulfills her duties until the end of the evening and only after saying goodbye to the last guest can breathe freely: she coped with her role brilliantly! If the wedding lasts more than one day, then the duties of the witness are extended for the entire period of celebration.
IMPORTANT NOTES:
How true friend, the witness must do her best to make this day unforgettable and not overshadowed by anything, therefore:
Try to think ahead
- consider the preferences of the bride and groom
- find out the characteristics of the guests
- be prepared to smooth out the “roughness” and possible “minor troubles” of this day
- “go over” with the bride on the eve of the wedding through the entire to-do list / call all “service providers” (hairdresser / makeup artist, photographer, limousine driver, toastmaster, etc.)
- stock up on the “rescuer” arsenal: thread and needle, scissors, “moment” glue, sedative, wet wipes, handkerchief, lipstick, powder, mirror. It’s worth discussing these little things with your friend before the wedding.
- before leaving “home”, check for passports and rings (yes, the best man should take care of this, but it’s better to check additionally, and ask to see these items, I’m serious!)
- help guests navigate what is happening (who, where, why, when, etc.)
- on your wedding day, constantly repeat to the bride that today she is the most beautiful, the happiest, the most charming and attractive
“Wedding and bridesmaid” are inseparable concepts, just like “wedding and bride.” Every witness remembers a wedding in which she played one of the main roles. And in many ways it depends on the witness how this important event for her friend will go. Therefore, dear witnesses, this important and honorable role imposes on you many obligations, and sometimes restrictions (not to mention the fact that you will forever remain in the memories of guests and young people, as a witness at a wedding), but for the sake of a dear friend, you can go not such “sacrifices”: help the bride organize the wedding, be her psychological support... and in in this case The phrase “Do as you would like them to do to you” would be very appropriate - after all, you too will be a bride someday.
Should one couple then marry each other?
The best men of one couple at a wedding are considered spiritual relatives. If they are already spouses, then nothing changes. But if they were not married, then their relationship can only be religious and spiritual. This is the role of best men-witnesses - they are spiritually responsible for the married couple.
What should witnesses do at a wedding?
If you have been chosen as a witness (witness), remember that your role at YOUR FRIENDS’ wedding is somewhat greater than sitting with the newlyweds at the same table and appearing in every frame. Being a good witness comes with a lot of responsibility, and you must be aware that you are able/willing to take it upon yourself. You must be the most collected, and your main task is to make sure that the newlyweds deal with organizational issues as little as possible, and enjoy THEIR wedding. Forget that this is a holiday primarily for you, and a reason to have a good time and relax.
Below we list the possible responsibilities of witnesses:
Before the wedding day, the witness must:
Sometimes the bridesmaids organize the bachelorette party (and the groomsmen organize the bachelor party)
Arriving at the bride's house before registration, the witness must:
Help the bride get dressed, fix her hair and dress.
Remind the bride to bring things like extra stockings, lipstick, powder.
Help collect handbag brides If you don’t have a handbag, make sure to bring with you cosmetics for the bride, perfume and other necessary accessories.
Check if you forgot to take a photo and video camera (if necessary).
Prepare sandwiches, champagne and glasses for the walk (as agreed with the bride).
Calm down the emotional bride or her mother.
Be in good mood, encourage the bride with compliments.
IN Registry office witnesses must
Order photo and video shooting (by agreement with the newlyweds).
Help guests take their seats in the reception hall.
Help the bride hold bridal bouquet when painting and exchanging rings (if necessary).
After congratulating the guests and presenting the bride with flowers, take all the bouquets from her, except for the wedding one.
Make sure that the newlyweds have not forgotten their passports, rings and other personal belongings at the registry office.
Prepare rose petals, coins, etc. for the ceremony of sprinkling the newlyweds and organizing guests for this ceremony
After leaving the registry office, help seat guests in their cars.
During the walk, witnesses should:
Help young people carry their personal belongings
“Feed” guests with sandwiches taken with you
The witness must follow appearance bride, help her adjust her dress, hairstyle, makeup
At the banquet, witnesses must:
Ensure that food is served on time
Offer the photographer, cameraman or presenter a snack. Find a place for them at the wedding table.
Indicate to guests where they can put gifts for the newlyweds.
If necessary, help the presenter with organizational issues.
After the banquet ends, witnesses must:
Help newlyweds collect and deliver gifts and flowers
Free the newlyweds from dealing with money issues, such as handing out tips.
Do witnesses have to sign any documents?
No. Since 2000, the institution of witnesses has been abolished, and the presence of witnesses at the wedding (as well as at the wedding) is optional and depends only on the wishes of the newlyweds.
Can the witnesses be relatives of the young people?
Since no official demands can be made on witnesses, and folk signs about the witnesses contradict each other, we will assume that the witnesses can be related to the young people, and they can also be married, single, married to each other, divorced and whatever else - the main thing is that they must be close and good friends of the bride and groom .
Is it possible to choose married friends/girlfriends as witnesses? Or do they have to be married to each other?
See the answer to the previous question.
How to dress? Dark or light?
First of all, ask the bride and groom how they would like to see guests and, in particular, witnesses at their wedding. If they do not express specific wishes, follow these tips:
Don't wear black to a wedding, especially if you've been warned about it. It will be better if the suits of the invited male guests are dark blue or dark gray, but not black
The bridesmaid should not try to outdo the bride with her outfit. Don't wear curvy ones evening dresses, which are very noticeable. Don't make it sophisticated evening hairstyle, if you assume that the bride, compared to you, will look more modest.
Find out what color the bride's dress will be. If it is blue, do not wear green, for example; if it is red, under no circumstances appear in red; if the dress is champagne (ivory), avoid light beige outfits so as not to “blend in” with the bride’s color scheme .
Is a witness tape a required attribute, or is something else possible?
These days, witness ribbons are increasingly associated with Soviet-era weddings. However, whether witnesses should wear ribbons is a matter of personal taste.
There are other ways to distinguish witnesses from the crowd of invited guests: you can order a boutonniere for the witness (best man) in the same style as the groom's boutonniere, and for the witness (bridesmaid) - a bouquet, bracelet or necklace made of flowers.
What should witnesses do at a wedding?
When present at the wedding ceremony, witnesses hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. The wedding crown should be held with one hand; if the hand is tired, it is permissible to change hands without changing the position of the crown (i.e. you put the second hand on the crown and lower the first). The crowns will need to be held for about 20 minutes.
However, it is known that in some churches the priest can put crowns directly on the heads of those getting married.
Wedding candles are held only by newlyweds, not by witnesses.
Can unbaptized friends be witnesses at a wedding?
No, witnesses must be baptized and wear a cross.
If there is a wedding without a toastmaster (host), can his role be played by witnesses?
"They can", but not "should"!
If you are a witness and the newlyweds decide to entrust you with the duties of a host (toastmaster), be sure to discuss with them what is expected of you and what should/should not be done and said. Sometimes newlyweds, refusing a professional host, draw up the banquet program themselves and involve witnesses in this process.
If you feel that the ability to speak in front of an audience, entertain guests and guide the right direction a ship called “wedding” is not your strongest quality, honestly admit this to the newlyweds. It is better to give the reins of government to an experienced person, a natural ringleader, for example, one of the relatives, than to just good friend, even if this friend is a witness.
Perhaps the most important people at a wedding celebration, after the bride and groom, are the witnesses who are with the newlyweds throughout the celebration. The role of a witness at a wedding is especially troublesome, but at the same time very honorable and enjoyable.
The witness has many responsibilities, so it would be a good idea to shift some of them to other friends of the bride or her relatives. You should begin to fulfill your tasks long before the celebration. For example, her responsibility is to help in choosing an outfit for the bride, as well as in preparing wedding events. Of course, no one demands that she take on all the organizational issues herself. Her task is to provide moral support to her friend, who is probably very worried about own wedding.
Also, the witness at the wedding is responsible for organizing such a pre-wedding event as a bachelorette party. You need to try to make the event relaxed and fun, as a successful bachelorette party will help the bride take a break from pre-wedding worries and get rid of unnecessary anxiety.
The preparation of such an exciting wedding moment as the ransom also lies on the shoulders of the witness. Here you will have to try to make the test for the groom fun and playful. The witness at the wedding should select competitions and tasks in such a way that the entire ransom takes no more than thirty minutes. A prolonged ransom irritates and tires the groom and makes the guests bored.
On the pre-wedding day, the witness needs to carefully prepare her purse so that she has everything she needs so that she can correct any trouble. The standard set includes: thread (white) with a needle, several pins, hairpins, bobby pins, comb, mirror, napkins (wet and dry), powder and lipstick or This kind of “first aid” set will help you quickly put your outfit in order or in order in case of the occurrence of complex unforeseen situations.
On the day of the celebration, the witness at the wedding comes to the bride first to help her friend with her outfit and hairstyle. When the groom arrives, the witness carries out the ransom, recruiting the bride's other friends to help.
Before going to the registry office, the witness needs to check whether the newlyweds’ passports, wedding rings, champagne, glasses and other small items have not been forgotten in a hurry. And after the registration procedure is completed, when all the guests begin to congratulate the young spouses, witnesses should be ready to help the bride in time to “get rid” of the bouquets that the congratulators will hand her.
When the newlyweds leave the hall, it is customary to shower them with rose petals, sweets and coins. This event should also be prepared by witnesses by distributing props to the guests in advance and “lining up” them so that a corridor is formed. At the same time, it is important to explain to guests that flower petals should be thrown up, and coins and sweets should be thrown at the feet of the young people.
The witness does not have to relax during the banquet either. She must ensure that all guests are seated at the tables, and also help the bride accept gifts by organizing a place where wedding gifts can be temporarily stored.
Of course, you will need to prepare from the witness, which should be sincere, warm and original. The participation of witnesses in various competitions and games organized by the toastmaster is also mandatory. The duties of witnesses end only after all wedding celebrations are completed.
In the pre-wedding bustle, the bridesmaid needs to find time to prepare a decent outfit for herself. The dress (or suit) should be moderately elegant, but in no case should it try to compete with the bride’s outfit.
Witnesses are the main assistants of the newlyweds. This honorable position is not limited to just attending the ceremony with a red ribbon and making toasts to festive table. Previously, in Rus' the groom was called a groomsman. The funniest and liveliest person was chosen for this role. He accompanied the groom during, on, paid off the matchmaker, and so on. The witness these days also takes on many preparation responsibilities.
On the eve of the wedding, a witness in which the groom says goodbye to his free bachelor life. The witness must come up with funny scenario evenings so that it does not turn into a regular drinking session.
The witness makes sure that the groom does not forget the rings, passport, bouquet for the bride, as well as champagne and glasses for registration. After this, the witness goes with the groom to pick up the bride. There they will need to pass tests, which will be arranged by the witness and her friends. You will need cunning and the ability to bargain to appease them and help the groom break through to his betrothed alive and unharmed.
At the registry office, witnesses put their signatures in the registration book, and then pour champagne for everyone and loudly shout “Bitter!” At the table, the witness sits next to the groom and cares for all the ladies who are nearby. In addition, he must keep an eye out, as it could be stolen again. And of course, the witness takes part in all competitions and sweepstakes, he must be ready to start dancing at any moment.
The bride's friend, whom she entrusted with the role of witness, is also not idle. She helps you choose a wedding dress, accompanying you on endless trips to wedding salons. She may be asked to order flowers for a celebration, send out invitations, or book a hotel room.
The sacred duty of a witness is on the eve of the wedding. She is responsible for entertainment program, for food and drinks, chooses a place for this event. She also selects the musical accompaniment.
On the wedding day, the witness should already be with the bride in the morning, she helps her dress up, and at the same time, at times calms her down. When the groom appears, the girlfriend makes him suffer thoroughly, coming up with various obstacles and tasks.
After this, the witness goes to the registry office together with the newlyweds and puts her signature in the registration book. At the banquet she should sit next to the bride. You need to prepare a few in advance good toast. Throughout the entire holiday, the bride's friend acts as a mass entertainer, helping the toastmaster in organizing competitions and games. And only when the last guest leaves the banquet will the mission of the witnesses be completed.
