FIRST WEDDING NIGHT, in the traditional sense - the first sexual contact newlyweds accompanied by the bride;
today this is a largely conditional term, since such a night can take place long before the official marriage or some time after the registration of the marriage; Moreover, the first intimate encounter does not always take place at night. Even with inexperience in matters of sex, newlyweds are able to have sexual intercourse, but the wedding night is too an important event
in the lives of lovers to take it lightly. Thus, according to Steckel, “for a woman’s love, an exceptional role is played by the circumstance whether the first bars passed with dissonance or with a complete harmonic chord” (see). The conditions that it is advisable to fulfill during the first intimacy are quite simple, but you should think about them in advance.
It is quite obvious that the first wedding night should take place without witnesses and with full confidence of the newlyweds that their privacy will not be violated even by accident. The marriage bed should not creak; it is advisable that the room be in twilight.
Both spouses should remember the need for preliminary hygiene procedures (warm water and soap are quite enough for this). It should be remembered that the attitude towards the first sexual intercourse in girls is significantly different from that of men. Most girls experience a certain fear before their first intercourse, their first wedding night . They enjoy hugs, kisses, caresses and tender words beloved man, but the upcoming sexual intercourse is often perceived fearfully and warily. Perseverance young man , his reluctance to take into account the girl’s feelings and experiences, and sometimes gross violence can cause her mental, and if she resists, physical trauma, often with serious consequences for further intimate life
consequences (for example, the development or formation in a young woman of aversion to sexual intercourse). You must be patient and persistent, gentle and always confident in your abilities. During defloration during the first pain can be reduced to a minimum if the first is performed in one of the following poses. The wife lies across the bed on her back, lowering her legs to the floor, the husband spreads her thighs to such an extent that he can stand between them, leaning on his hands on either side of his wife (holding his weight), at the moment of insertion he finds himself in an inclined position. An even more gentle position is considered when a girl, lying completely on her back, places a pillow or a rolled-up blanket under her buttocks, and raises her bent legs at the knees to her chest, which ensures maximum tension. hymen at the entrance to the vagina and ensures its rupture. Powerful and elastic muscles of the perineum, tense, narrow the entrance to the vagina, making the first sexual intercourse difficult, and therefore it is necessary to consciously relax them.
The next sexual intercourse after the first wedding night is recommended no earlier than a day or a few days later (after the hymen tears have healed), even if the young wife does not mind doing it earlier. Very rarely, bleeding does not stop for a long time - in this case you need to contact a gynecologist (see).
If at the first intimacy the young woman has no blood and no complaints discomfort arising when the degree of sexual arousal is insufficient (due to the lack of vaginal lubrication), sexual intercourse can continue until its logical conclusion - ejaculation. In this case, it is possible to use one of the methods of contraception: interrupted coitus, condom, calendar method etc. (see).
On your wedding night you can hardly recognize the best option, although such cases are by no means uncommon. If the first wedding night coincides with menstruation, you need to know that intercourse during this period is undesirable (see). Occasionally, women experience vaginismus, when it is pointless to use force to achieve insertion of the penis into the vagina, since this is almost impossible to achieve, and the relationship will be damaged for a long time.
In some cases, men may have a premature erection during their wedding night (sometimes even with intense caresses or the very first frictions), but there should not be strong feelings about this, since after a short period of time an erection may occur again, and the degree of arousal of the man will decrease somewhat , which will increase the duration of intercourse. Often, mainly among timid, shy, suspicious, insecure young men, an erection of the penis does not occur or sharply weakens when trying to have an intercourse, and sexual intercourse ends in failure.
It is very important that the young wife behaves correctly in this situation. It is well known that reproaches and irritations from a partner contribute to a young man’s neurotic fixation on sexual problems, increase his fear of intimacy, and therefore the likelihood of repeated breakdowns with each subsequent attempt to perform sexual intercourse.
What to do on your wedding night?
So what to do on your wedding night? If you decide to make preparations for this night yourself, then first of all, you need to choose the place where it will take place. Each hotel has special rooms for newlyweds, and you can rent one of these rooms in your city, or you can go to another city and rent such a room there.
You can also take a ride on a ship and spend your first wedding night in the ship’s cabin, especially since now every ship has more than one cabin for newlyweds, in which a romantic atmosphere is created.
It doesn’t matter which option you choose, the most important thing is that this night of love does not take place in your apartment, where your or his parents are sleeping behind the wall. This night should belong only to you and you should think only about yourself, and not about the fact that you might accidentally wake up your parents.
We have decided on the place, now we need to decide on the attributes that you will need for your wedding night.
First, you need to stock up on gourmet but light food and champagne. For food, give preference to seafood and fruits.
Secondly, purchase silk bed linen and rose petals in advance, which you will sprinkle on the bed. Of course, at first it will be unusual for you to lie on silk sheets, but it will add novelty to your sexual relationship.
Thirdly, you need to think about your underwear, which will be seen by your new husband. It’s good if you can change your wedding lingerie to something more erotic and sexy so that your man will not remain indifferent.
Don't forget about candles, which should give your room a romantic atmosphere. Just don’t get carried away with scented candles, otherwise instead of having a pleasant time, you’ll have to ventilate the room all night.
Before your wedding night, try to make your skin soft and smooth by making a moisturizing body mask or moisturizing wrap.
If you want to remain as beautiful on your wedding night as you were at the wedding, then instead of mascara you need to stick on false eyelashes so that in the morning your husband will not see streaks from the mascara.
While taking a bath, drop 2 drops of rose essential oil into the water; it will not only give you charm and confidence, but will also envelop your body with a pleasant and delicate aroma, and this is just what you need for a night of love.
When the banquet is over and you are left alone with your husband, you don’t need to unpack the gifts right away, it can wait. It’s better to turn on romantic music and light the candles placed in advance around the room, have dinner, drink champagne, take a bath together, make each other Erotic massage and fulfill everything you dreamed of, but did not dare to do. On your first night of marriage, embody all your sexual desires into life so that you remember this night for the rest of your life.
: use knowledge for health
The first wedding night in Rus' was arranged in a special way and had many differences from similar traditions of other nations. Among the peoples of Africa, Europe and India, the right of the first night implied intimate contact between the bride and a stranger. Often it was the elder of the tribe, a noble gentleman, or even just the first person they met.
In Rus', the right to deflower a girl traditionally belonged to her future husband. According to church canons, a married marriage is sacred and any attempt on someone else’s marriage bed is a great sin. Later, feudal lords often neglected this law and used the right of the first wedding night, but the church did not welcome this.
Time spending
The wedding ceremony in Rus' was a very complex sacrament that combined Christian and pagan traditions. The timing of the wedding was always chosen very carefully. In many peoples of the world, the first intercourse of newlyweds could occur on the third or fourth day, or even later (some Muslim countries, India, etc.).
For Russians, the first wedding night took place during the wedding celebration, so it was very important to schedule the wedding on the date permitted by the church. According to Orthodox laws, it is forbidden to have sexual relations during Lent and during church holidays, therefore, weddings were not scheduled for this time. The date of the celebration was carefully selected in accordance with the church calendar.
Ritual of preparation for the wedding night
For a long time, the Russian people called their wedding night a basement. This is due to the fact that the newlyweds’ bed was always arranged in a cool place: in the basement of a hut, closet, barn or bathhouse. This always happened on the territory of the groom, since the girl after the wedding went to live with him.
A high bed on a strong wooden base was prepared for the newlyweds. It was covered with bedding that was taken from the girl's dowry. The preparation of the bed for the bride and groom was carried out by female matchmakers. The groom's mother or sister could also prepare the bed.
Many ritual objects were placed on the bed, which were supposed to protect the newlyweds from damage and provide them with a comfortable existence in the future. Such amulets included small sheaves of rye, bags of flour, mattresses, and feather beds. The bed was covered on top with a snow-white embroidered blanket.
Several logs, a frying pan, a poker, and a juniper branch were placed under the bed. These items were supposed to protect the couple from all evil spirits. The logs symbolized future offspring, so more of them had to be placed.
Seeing off the newlyweds
The newlyweds were escorted to the “bedchamber” prepared in this way by a whole crowd of guests: boyfriends, matchmakers, relatives and in general anyone who wanted to take part in the noisy and fun action. The farewell was accompanied by songs, obscene jokes and advice. The friend hit the box with a whip, driving out evil spirits. He then had to pay a ransom to the bedwomen.
Alone
After all these rituals, the newlyweds were finally left alone. The door was locked, and a cage guard was left near it. He also had to protect the newlyweds from evil spells and various evil spirits. But guests often stayed at the door and simply spied on the young people.
Left alone, the bride and groom first treated themselves to bread and chicken. This food was supposed to give the couple fertility. After eating, the girl was obliged to take off the guy’s boots. Thus, she demonstrated humility before her future husband and showed her readiness to obey him in everything. Also, the girl had to ask her husband for permission to lie with him.
Then sexual intercourse must take place. A friend came to inquire about this several times. As soon as the girl lost her virginity, the marriage was considered physically confirmed, which was loudly announced to all guests. The newlyweds could be taken out to the feast again and delighted with songs of the most obscene content, or the guests themselves came to the basement of the newlyweds and stayed there with them until dawn.
Innocence as the main attribute
The most important moment in this whole ritual was the demonstration of the bride's shirt with blood stains. If the bride retained her virginity before the wedding, she was considered honest. IN otherwise brought shame not only on herself, but also on her parents. A collar was hung around the neck of the matchmaker and the parents of the dishonest newlywed. They brought my father a glass of wine with a holey bottom. The girl could even be returned to her father's house.
The loss of virginity on the first wedding night was symbolically celebrated by hanging towels embroidered with red threads and beating pots. After this, the girl became “young”, and the guy became “young”. After the wedding night, the young woman was dressed in clothes married woman and put on her appropriate headdress. The whole ritual had to be strictly observed, otherwise new family infertility and poverty threatened.
That is a night full of secrets, which the newlyweds anxiously await. It is advisable for young people to put on elegant clothes and perfume themselves with incense. The groom, entering the bride, must first greet her, make her small gift, treat you to something and have a heart-to-heart talk. Then it is advisable that the young people separately perform two rak'ahs of prayer and ask Allah to make their lives happy and full of abundance. This will help young people to get a little distracted and calm down, because namaz has a powerful psychological effect.
If the wedding night fell on menstrual cycle brides, then sexual intercourse, of course, is postponed to other days, for sexual intercourse on Haida days is haram.
I would not like to ignore the custom, still widespread among Muslim peoples, of waiting for the completion of sexual intercourse between young people outside the door of the room in order to check the bed and make sure of the bride’s innocence. But controlling the newlyweds, exploring issues that should remain secret between spouses, is a custom that leads to haram. This custom violates Islamic injunctions not to spy or spy on other people. He makes public what should be a secret between spouses, for their relationship is the sacrament of marriage. A situation may also arise in which the bride may become the object of unfounded suspicion, and her honor and dignity may be harmed. Such customs can cast a shadow on the relationship of young people and darken their entire subsequent lives. Therefore, Muslims should make every effort to abandon such practices that are contrary to the principles of Islam.
The wedding night requires patience and delicacy. A man has a lot of responsibility on his shoulders. The fright and excitement of the bride are quite normal and the man must do everything so that this night does not disgust the bride and does not frighten her, because this can leave an imprint on her whole life.
Firstly, it is quite difficult for a girl to leave her parents’ house, where she spent all her years, and start new life in a new home, to submit to a man, and at this moment she really needs understanding and affection. No woman will ever forget her first man. And if the first night is full of new and pleasant sensations, if everything is surrounded by affection and love, she will be grateful to him all her life. Even if they separate for some reason, the memories of the first night will always give them pleasant feelings.
Some young men think that on the first night they need to show their masculinity, and act rudely and tactlessly. The wedding night requires delicacy, and the man must give more than he takes. Every man needs to learn that the first night can have a big impact on future life families.
You can't start straight away with undressing. It is advisable that the girl do this herself. In this case, under no circumstances should you immediately greedily examine the bride’s body. In most cases, when undressing in front of a man for the first time in her life, a girl experiences unprecedented shame. The man's body makes her afraid. Therefore, for the first time it is necessary to turn off or reduce the light of the lamp or undress behind a curtain, and it is best for the man not to look in the direction of the bride. First you need to take off your outer clothing, and underwear- already in bed, under the covers.
On the wedding night Love games and caresses are very important. No matter how shy the girl is, no matter how awkward she is, she will gradually begin to calm down. If the man shows delicacy and behaves as expected, the bride will slowly begin to awaken desire.
Defloration is not a painful act, as it seems to many girls. To a normal girl and this will not cause any trouble to the young man. The main thing is to prepare the girl for sexual intercourse with preliminary love games. If the bride cannot calm down and is very nervous, the groom should try to understand her and postpone sexual intercourse until the next day.
Excessive persistence or brute force can cause a girl to develop a disease called vaginismus. With this disease, spasm of the female genital organs occurs, and penetration of the male genital organ into the vagina becomes impossible. Even if sexual intercourse occurs, it causes excruciating pain in the woman.
I would like to remind you that the first wedding night is a very serious event. You shouldn’t take this lightly - they say, it will pass as it passes. Start careful preparation long before the wedding: choose underwear and bed linen, think about the condition of your skin, how to create an environment in such a way that, first of all, you are confident! Discuss your wedding night with your partner, dream, make plans - this brings you closer and eliminates embarrassment in the future.
The first wedding night should take place in a particularly cozy, calm and comfortable conditions. This is necessary so that a woman can feel calm, confident, and be able to easily focus on her partner’s actions. Among the special conditions we can list - complete privacy not only in the room, but also in the apartment (hotel) with shower and toilet, preferably separate. There must be a wide, comfortable bed, preferably not too easily soiled (colored, with a patterned design).
The lucky ones are those newlyweds who, after the wedding, can go to their own apartment, where no one will disturb them. It will be worse for those who plan to live with their parents. In this case, for the first wedding night, the bride and groom will either have to rent a hotel room or move the entire family to live with other relatives for a day or two.
But no matter where you have to spend your first wedding night, some attributes will certainly come in handy:
1. Bed linen
Pink or bright scarlet silk is a very chic option. But silk is a very slippery material, so this case choose bedding from other material that is pleasant to the body. Cotton or linen bedding works well. Sheets and pillows can be lightly scented using essential oils or your favorite perfume.
2. Romantic music
If you are a lover of pop culture or, conversely, a connoisseur of rock music, it is better to save your preferences for another occasion. And on your wedding night, classical instrumental music will help you create a pleasant atmosphere. Do not play music loudly, because it is just a background and should not distract you from each other.
3. Drinks
Don't forget to take a couple of bottles of champagne with you from the banquet, or better yet, bring them to your apartment in advance. You can take wine instead of champagne, but it’s better to avoid stronger drinks, otherwise all the romance will quickly disappear.
4. Something to eat
You’ll somehow manage without borscht and grandma’s cutlets on your wedding night. But light sandwiches, fruits, sweets and even a couple of salads will be very useful to you. The night is long, maybe my appetite will still wake up. And most likely, he will wake up quite quickly, since excitement, guests and toastmasters rarely give young people the opportunity to eat normally during the day.
5. Candles
What kind of romantic setting without candles? Subdued light, flickering shadows...
6. Flowers and balls
The groom can take on the decoration of your bedroom, or entrust it to friends. Everything will come in handy here - air balloons, romantic inscriptions and painted hearts on the mirror, posters, serpentine. Don't forget to put flowers in vases. Although you don’t have to do this in advance - you will be given a lot of flowers at the wedding, just don’t forget to take them with you from the banquet.
7. The magic of smells
Smells can control our subconscious and influence erotic desire. You can use aroma sticks and aroma lamps with jasmine, rose or lavender oils to complement the atmosphere of your wedding night.
8. Sexy lingerie
Seductive underwear, stockings, a garter, a lace negligee - you need to arm yourself with all this before wedding night. If under Wedding Dress you, as brides often do, will put on lingerie flesh-colored, then for the evening you can prepare a second, more elegant set.
If you are planning to spend your wedding night in a hotel, then everything is much simpler in terms of organization and more luxurious in scope. You don't have to worry about drinks and food, bed linen and other little things. Another advantage may be the presence of a swimming pool or jacuzzi in the hotel.
It is very important that this night becomes a truly magical and unforgettable night of love. Be attentive and gentle to each other, try to make it full of tenderness and romance.
A man married a conservatory student. The wedding night. He quickly undresses and jumps into bed. She undresses, carefully corrects her makeup, puts on a peignoir and shoes, stands on a chair in the middle of the room, and announces in a well-trained voice:
- Marital duty! Performed for the first time.
After the first wedding night. Wife:
- Hm-yes. You are not an important lover...
- I wonder how you were able to determine this in 10 seconds?
The first wedding night, the wife undresses in front of her husband, suddenly he notices that the wife does not have a navel:
- Where is the navel?
- It was erased in the hostel.
The wedding night. The bride turns out to be NOT a virgin. The groom scolds her:
- Mash, how does this happen? You swore and swore to me that you were a virgin!
- What, did I really say that? Oh, how inconvenient it is...
The wedding night. The groom leads the bride into the bedroom.
- You know, dear, it’s good that you didn’t give yourself to me before the wedding. I have to admit, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have married you.
- I didn’t know?! How many men have screwed me over like this before I realized what was going on.
The morning after their wedding night, the young wife tells her mother:
- Mom, it was so cool, we fucked three times!
- Daughter, watch your expressions! If I had said, for example, that you ate sprats, I would have understood.
The next day her daughter says to her:
- Mom, can you imagine, tonight we ate 5 cans of sprat, we liked it so much that my husband licked the can, and I sucked the can opener!
Before the wedding, the village guy is instructed by the priest:
- In family life you should always have love and harmony. And in bed there should be harmony between you!
After the first wedding night, the priest asks:
- Well, was everything okay?
- Yes! Everything was going wrong, but by morning I finally threw away the accordion!
Village. A house has four walls. The wedding night. Behind the curtain are mother and father. Son's voice in the middle of the night:
- Mom!
Mother to father quietly:
- Is something not going well?
- Shut up, you fool, they'll figure it out themselves.
Son even louder:
- Mommy!!
Mother whispers to father:
- Can I help you with something?
- Shut up, maybe he’s not a fool, he’ll guess.
The son shouts:
- Mom!!!
The mother couldn't stand it:
- What, son?!
- That’s good!!!
The newlywed asks the old married man:
- Everyone says “honeymoon”... What is it?
- How can I explain it more clearly to you? Imagine yours family life in the form of a barrel of tar. And on top there is a small layer of honey. Understood?
- Ah... So I opened the barrel from the wrong side!
A man comes to work after his wedding. Colleagues:
- So how was your wedding night?
- I do not remember! I lost consciousness after she peeled off my eyelashes.
The newlyweds, after a long and tiring wedding day, were finally alone. The happy husband sits down on the bed and says:
- How impatiently I was waiting for this moment!
- Did they give you new shoes too?
