At what age do you start raising children? This question is very serious. After all, some believe that raising a child is necessary after he learns to speak and understand. This is a wrong point of view.
From the first days of life little man it is important to take care not only of his normal physical development, but also to promote correct neuropsychic development. The intensive development of children at an early age has an impact on their entire subsequent life. How a child’s childhood goes largely depends on his health, character, and attitude towards the environment.
Parenting- This is a real art that parents have to perfect throughout their lives. A standard approach to raising children is unacceptable - you need to be flexible, using different methods and means.
Never strive for a child to acquire more knowledge and skills than is available at his age. At the same time, each person needs an individual approach, taking into account that the child early age gets tired quickly and gets excited easily.
If you do not start raising a child from the first days of life, then from the 2-3rd month he will already lag behind in development. And improper upbringing contributes to the development of bad habits in children.
From birth to 3 months:
How to develop a joyful and active state in a young child? Every time you pick up your baby for feeding, changing clothes or going to the toilet, talk and play with him for a few minutes. If from the first weeks you talk to children often, affectionately and with a smile, then they develop better, babble a lot, which improves their vocal apparatus.
During waking hours, children should be given the opportunity to move freely and engage with age-appropriate toys. Before each feeding and going to bed, you need to systematically place the baby on his stomach to develop the ability to raise his head. And also, to raise emotional tone, hold the child in your arms for a short time.
Show your child various toys, but do not hang him up or give him many toys at once - this scatters his attention and causes fatigue. If the baby looks at the toy, but does not reach out to it, then stroke his hand with the toy - this encourages him to stretch out his arms.
When putting children to sleep, rock them incorrectly, pat them with your hand, or use other methods to help them fall asleep faster. All this is harmful for them and takes a lot of effort and time from adults, since, having gotten used to falling asleep only this way, they will not be able to do without it, they will be capricious and sleep restlessly.
Raising young children. From 3 to 6 months:
— Talk more with children, maintaining a joyful mood and eliciting response sounds.
— Develop the skill of picking up and holding a toy.
— Help in mastering crawling.
- Learn to roll over from back to stomach.
Raising young children. From 6 to 9 months:
At this age, the child masters various movements, understands speech, pronounces individual syllables and gradually begins to distinguish the intonations of adults. Therefore, when dealing with a child, you can already use a strict tone to prohibit and a gentle tone to encourage.
It is necessary to expand the child’s interest in the environment by naming this or that object several times and encouraging him to pick up a fallen toy. New movements and poses bring joy to the child. Promote the development of skills that children cannot master without adult help.
Raising young children. From 9 months to 1 year:
Typically, from this age, children have an increased need to communicate with adults. They are drawn to the one who pays them more attention, treats them kindly and who is more involved with them. But at the same time, do not limit the child’s independent activity: let him play with toys on his own for some time, crawl or walk, holding on to various objects, overcome some difficulties within his power - this brings joy to children.
Arrange joint games for children with two or more children. But they need to be skillfully led, taught to treat each other correctly and provide mutual assistance.
Also, adults should conduct special activities, games and entertainment with children for educational purposes. Adults are required to be patient while the child masters a skill, and then gradually move on to another exercise.
Raising young children. From 1 year to 2 years:
In the second year of a child’s life, your educational tasks become somewhat more complicated. As the child develops, his interests, desires and communication with adults expand. At this time, the nature of the game also changes - while playing, children imitate the actions of adults and express their impressions of the environment. Therefore, your task is to create a target setting in the game and bring it to the final result. And to do this, we need to develop children’s interest in the results of their actions. Try to organize games that reflect what is happening around you.
Raising young children. From 2 to 3 years:
At this age, the speech and behavior of adults is of great educational importance for children, especially the way family members talk to each other.
In the third year of life, the child strives for independence. Support his desire to dress himself, wash himself, get toys, and overcome small obstacles.
In addition to the child’s independent activities, adults need to select the most useful games activities that will develop his coordination of movements, accuracy, dexterity and other valuable qualities. To do this, you need a variety of toys and special aids for drawing, modeling, “construction” and others.
It is necessary to skillfully guide children’s activities so that they try to finish one task and only then switch to another. Praise children for their efforts.
Encourage children to talk more, teach them new words and new actions. Teach your child to be organized and neat, so that he collects scattered toys, puts his high chair in place, etc.
But do not forget that children from 2 to 3 years old still find it difficult to perceive and assimilate new material, because their attention is not sufficiently developed, and there is no need to overload them. First, give your child simple tasks: bring something, call someone, and gradually make it more difficult. Demand that the child comply with them.
If the child is developmentally delayed, remember the importance of an individual approach in education. For example, if he does not understand speech well, then when explaining the game, it is necessary to supplement the explanation with a demonstration. By successfully selecting games and other activities, you will help your child develop movements, speech, and emotions.
Not a single psychologist will give a clear answer to the question why in dysfunctional family Where parents drink and fight, and the only method of education is regular beatings, normal people grow up.
Many children who grew up in such conditions, having matured, take on their shoulders the maintenance of drunken parents, and at the same time create strong families and they dote on their own children. And vice versa, in a prosperous family, provided with everything necessary, where love reigns, egoists grow up.
There is no ideal method of education, strictly adhering to which one can raise a happy, loving adult. Otherwise, all the people around would be perfectly mannered. Nevertheless, child psychology as a science is able to answer most of parents’ questions related to upbringing.
How to raise a harmonious, strong and happy personality?
Many adults who do not yet have children themselves think that there is nothing difficult in raising a child. How often many of us, looking at a child screaming and capricious in a store, thought that, unlike his calm parents, we would quickly find justice for the little extortionist. Or, on the contrary, seeing how a mother spanks or screams at her child, they thought that she was an unbalanced hysterical woman who attacked the “little angel.”
The truth is that judging from the outside is a thankless task and You can understand how a parent feels only by becoming one. It is impossible to predict in advance your reaction in a given situation. Each situation is individual, each baby and his parent are unique, unlike anyone else. A loving mother and father must intuitively feel their child and find an individual approach to him. They can use the basic principles proper education, while changing them to suit you.
Basic principles of education
Many psychologists say that you need to educate yourself, not the child. How can you teach your offspring punctuality and order if the mother is a constantly late slob? Will the baby respect his elders in general and his parents in particular if he sees his father raising his voice at his grandmother? A couple who became parents You need to be more careful about your behavior, since it is useless to demand from a child what adults themselves are not able to fulfill.
If family relationships are harmonious, there is love, respect and tenderness, you can count on the baby to develop into a strong and balanced personality. Unfortunately, only love and respect in the family does not guarantee that the child is being raised correctly. It is necessary to remember the basic psychological principles of proper upbringing:
How to properly raise a child depending on age
The formation of human personality is a long process and can last up to 21−23 years. But the basic qualities of personality and character, the foundations of education, are laid in a child under 5 years of age.
Each period of growing up of a baby requires an individual approach. Adults need to take into account all the nuances of growing up and developing the personality of their child. Therefore, it is important to find out in advance what and in what period to pay more attention if parents are interested in the question of how to raise a child correctly.
How to raise a child under one year old
Parents can lay the first foundations of upbringing within a week after the birth of the baby. Mom and Dad will need to adhere to the following, which are quite simple and pleasant for loving parents actions:
Raising a one-year-old baby
Once the baby reaches the age of 1 year, the process of physical and psychological development accelerates even more. The boundaries of the child’s interests begin to expand significantly, gradually, he begins to look at the world differently. This period may be accompanied by frequent whims of the baby, to which you should not react sharply. This is a truly important stage in personal development.
To successfully overcome this period and continue to properly raise your baby, you should adhere to the following principles:
- At the age of 11-12 months, the baby is already beginning to understand what is allowed to do and what is not. Already during this period, adults must clearly build a system of rewards and prohibitions.
- During children's whims, screaming and getting angry is not only pointless, but also harmful. Therefore, at such moments, the baby’s attention needs to be diverted to something else.
- Try to choose games in which the child and parents interact together.
- If the little one tries to take independent actions, try not to interfere with this.
How to properly raise a child under three years old
At the age of 2 to 3 years, a child goes through a very important stage of personality development. This is exactly the time when the baby goes through his first psychological crisis, which is also called the “three-year crisis.”
The best the method of education during this period is play. For correct behavior with a child and raising you need:
How to raise a child at 4-5 years old
Between 4 and 5 years, The baby's behavior becomes more and more conscious. This is already a separate person, whose interests and desires adults should treat with understanding and even respect. The upbringing process is becoming more and more complex, so parents need to interact with the child even more actively than before and adhere to the following rules:
- This is the best period for creative development baby. Mom and dad should draw with their child, take up singing, handicrafts or modeling.
- Children always, and especially during this period, should feel the active participation and support of their relatives.
- At the age of 5, children begin to perceive norms more consciously social behavior Therefore, it is important for adults to teach the baby how to behave in a given situation.
- Parents need to answer endless “whys” without irritation and with a smile. Otherwise, the child may withdraw into himself and his curiosity will be replaced by indifference.
Raising children aged 6 years and older
The older a child gets, the more people he interacts with. The child’s social circle expands, he has teachers and more friends. Gradually parents' authority begins to decline. TO " adolescence“Parental authority is almost minimal, while the influence and authority of friends is at the maximum level.
Strictly limiting your child in something or prohibiting communication with friends is counterproductive. You can achieve the opposite effect when the remnants of parental authority and trust are completely destroyed.
The most important point in communication, at this time, trust becomes. It is very important to save harmonious relationships in the family, for which the following principles should be adhered to:
- If a child has a problem, for example, at school, do not scold him, but try to find a way out together.
- Always be interested in successes and deeds.
- Involve children in joint activities.
- Support the desire to be independent and freedom of choice.
- Do not violate personal space.
The most common educational methods
Not all parents, for example, due to busy work or due to innate callousness of character, are able to sensitively feel their child. Such families do not practice a flexible approach to education. Adults, when communicating with their children, use time-tested methods of education that are not suitable for all children.
Method of physical punishment
The most controversial method of raising children. Most psychologists agree that using force against one’s own offspring Only flawed, complex individuals are capable of. They are unable to explain to the child what they want from him, they get angry and displace their anger on a weaker person.
Despite this, some parents can still spank a naughty toddler and see nothing wrong with it. And many adults who received “educational slaps on the head” from their parents in childhood are even grateful to them for this and are confident that it was precisely this method of education that made real people out of them.
The method of not arguing
This method is suitable only for very patient parents. Its whole essence lies in the ability to calmly, firmly and without unnecessary emotions insist on one’s own. When a child is capricious and shouts “I don’t want” or “I won’t” to all the admonitions of adults, it is necessary to clearly and convincingly explain why “will” and why “must”.
This method truly demands angelic patience from adults. But the baby will understand that all his whims will not lead to desired result and you still have to eat porridge or go to bed early.
The “one, two, three” method
The best thing this method affects small children. As soon as a child starts doing something illegal, adults should start counting. Before this, of course, it is necessary to explain to the child what punishment awaits him if, on the count of “three,” he does not stop the unwanted actions.
Mom and dad need to be prepared for the fact that their offspring will first test their determination and, most likely, disobey the first time. Punishment should follow immediately, then the baby will understand that the parents are serious. Most likely, next time, when counting begins, negative actions the baby will stop immediately.
Reinforcement method
This method works very well in both preschool and school age. If a child has done something right or done a good deed, he should definitely be praised. Moreover, this can also be done in the presence of relatives or guests. Even the baby’s small victories need to be paid attention to and praised. But be careful not to cross the line and the praise does not develop into praise.
If an offense has been committed, the child should explain why this should not happen again in the future. Only relatives should know about the negative actions of their child; they should not be condemned by everyone.
Persuasion method
The essence of this method is based on ordinary conversation. Adults should monitor its progress and make sure that it is a conversation “on equal terms,” but in no case is it a moral lesson.
If the child misbehaves, one of the relatives should invite him to a conversation, during which instructions and threats are unacceptable. The child needs to explain in a calm tone for some reason what he did wrong and support his arguments with examples from life. The conversation must be led to the point that the child independently draws the right conclusions.
Raising children has been considered the destiny of women since ancient times. Men, of course, take part in this, but responsibility for morality, intelligence and physical state the child falls on the female gender. When should you start raising your baby?
A big mistake is the opinion of those women who wait until the child grows up a little. Even before conceiving a baby, future parents should begin by educating themselves, that is, improving their mental state and physical health. After all, the “foundation” of his future is laid in the baby’s genetics from the moment of conception: a predisposition to diseases or, conversely, strong immunity. The condition of the baby in the womb can also shape its character.
Previously, people may not have been able to guess, but now almost no one doubts that a conceived child already has a soul, and he can feel the emotional and physical state of his mother and even hear her. By stroking her gradually growing belly and talking to the baby, the mother can calm him down and the baby will feel protected.
From the first days of life, a born child begins to “absorb into himself, like a sponge, all the information that only he can perceive. Children pick up on the character weaknesses of their parents and can already become capricious, trying to be a leader in family relationships. In such cases, feeling sorry for their children, parents begin to pamper them immensely. After all, how can you not take a baby when he urgently wants to be held in your arms at a moment when there is no time for this? First, having understood the devotion of their parents, the children point them out, and then begin to demand what the children are not allowed to do.
Before one year, you can instill in a child the most important things and teach him to love, trust and obey. The main thing is not to waste time.
In tsarist times, it was believed that parents were not created for children, but children were created for parents. And the kids respected those who raised them, calling them by name and patronymic when addressing them. They did not sit down at the table or touch the food until the head of the family began the meal. Even the best piece of food went to the owner, because it was believed that he, as the breadwinner, needed more physical strength. And now, when the father sits down at the table, the children are already wiping their mouths.
Why does this happen? Why is respect for adults lost? Yes, all because they could not or did not want to teach this to a then newborn baby.
Before answering the question of when to start raising your child, you need to decide what you want to see him like in the future. Parents must understand the seriousness of this problem. After all, we “mould” our children into future athletes, musicians, doctors or hooligans, greedy people and slackers. And if parents have realized it too late, there is no need to despair, because with increased desire and work, you can correct the character of your baby. You just need to be guided not only by your feelings, but also by your mind.
Remember that even when the fetus has not yet developed hearing and vision, even before the development of the brain and the first heartbeat, everything you do, think and feel affects the unborn baby. Your reaction to pregnancy, the reaction of your partner, friends, relatives, family situation, health and lifestyle - everything is passed on to your child in one way or another.
WITH proper nutrition And bad habits everything is clear, but how can he feel the love or dislike of others? Through your emotions. If you are sad, if you are scared or upset, your breathing and heart rate change, and many changes occur in the functioning of your body that are invisible to you, which significantly affect the course of pregnancy. Don’t rush to tear your hair out over a quarrel with your husband or short-term stress at work. We do not live in an artificial world, and to create ideal conditions It is not possible for a smooth pregnancy. Moreover, hormonal changes make us more vulnerable to all kinds of troubles. You are required to reduce sources of irritation and sadness, fill your life with pleasant impressions and not concentrate and get hung up on problems that arise. Don't eradicate! And keep it to a minimum. Setting achievable goals will help you achieve this.
Love your baby now. Even if just a few minutes ago you found two lines on a pregnancy test. Talk, talk about the world in which you live, find objects to admire and share them. Pat yourself on the tummy and involve your future dad in the conversation.
Create yourself a filter for incoming information. Limit viewing of news, action films, horror films, choose the most pleasant interlocutors for walks and communication.
Don't panic about your test results. Before giving in to despondency, consult with several specialists and re-donate blood. Very often, doctors scare pregnant women with their assumptions and far-fetched diagnoses. If there is an opportunity to change your gynecologist to a more sensitive one, do not miss it.
Your activities and hobbies also affect your child’s development. You can read stories aloud, draw, visit exhibitions, sing, or even develop your ability to learn a foreign language. Parents who spoke multiple languages during pregnancy report that their children showed interest and ability in learning them.
It is especially worth noting the influence of music on intrauterine education. During pregnancy, give preference to the classics. At the end of the second trimester, your baby will tell you what he doesn’t like and what he likes. This can be determined by his movements. Sharp jolts indicate dissatisfaction, while smooth movements show that he is pleased.
Talk to your loved ones, share ideas intrauterine development and ask for support and understanding. Many agree that we need to be more gentle when communicating with pregnant women, but some people need to be reminded of this. Don't be offended if you don't get "proper" attention. Everyone has their own problems and worries, try to understand and treat yourself to something pleasant.
Pregnancy, despite all the difficulties and physical discomfort, is an extraordinary period of unity with your child. You feel his movements and it gives you joy. This cannot be compared with anything. The extraordinary mystery of the birth of a new life, even after the invention of ultrasound and the development of science, excites us. Pregnancy is just the beginning of a long journey of developing your child’s personality. Try to make your baby's first nine months happy and calm and continue in the same direction after he is born.
When to start raising a child? You will be surprised - but from birth. It is from the first days of a child’s life that the fundamental elements of good manners are developed.
By the age of one year, a child develops the necessary skills and abilities, by the way, both good and not so good. Few people know, but it is necessary to cultivate neatness and basic moral and aesthetic qualities in children until they are one year old. During this same period, emotionality and a culture of communication develop. With the same success, kids are like sponges, absorbing bad habits.
I think none of the parents have any doubts that parents should make every effort to instill good things in their children, and, if possible, exclude examples bad behavior and demonstration of bad habits.
Let's move on directly to the methods of education. First of all, we will divide the first year of a child’s life into 4 stages: from zero to 3 months, 4-6 months; 7-9 months, 10-12 months.
- So, from birth to three months upbringing positive qualities for a baby may consist in the following actions of parents: teach him to fall asleep without rocking, pick him up less, at least for a certain time a day the baby should be in the crib himself. During this period, the child must learn to hold his head. Therefore, parents put the baby on his tummy every day, even if he protests. Over time, he will like it and spend most of his time in this position. The mother should work with the child and teach him to produce the simplest syllables for his age, and to react visually to the sounds of rattles. At the first dissatisfaction of the baby, it is necessary to change the diaper, and each time wash it well and use cream so that there is no irritation and the child does not get used to slight discomfort. And in general, in order to develop the habit of cleanliness, the baby’s day should begin with all the necessary hygiene procedures: washing the face and hands, changing the diaper. Daily and strict implementation of such procedures will lead to the desired result.
- At the stage of 4-6 months The child needs to develop future speech. Therefore, it is necessary to ensure that the child listens to music that is acceptable to him. You should focus your baby’s attention on sounds that are new to him, play often and talk through your actions with him as much as possible, for example, when dressing, when feeding, etc.
- From 7 to 9 months the physical development of the child is formed. And it is at this age that the child’s activity begins to increase. He is learning to crawl and stand up. Therefore, parents should play games with their baby that require certain movements. You can move with your children to the music, play ladushki, magpie-thief, etc.
- At the last stage We continue to form the child’s speech and mental capacity, not forgetting also the physical development of the baby. During this period, it is necessary to reorganize play moments so that the child can independently reproduce actions: stack cubes, roll a car, etc. To develop speech, it is good to organize theatrical performances. Parents can come to our aid with an abundance of toys to develop logic.
