At the very beginning of a relationship between a man and a woman, a “fire” of feelings and emotions breaks out, which is impossible to calm down and difficult to control.
Over time, alas, the “flame” becomes calmer and it seems to partners that they receive less. If passion leaves the relationship completely, taking with it sexual attraction, there is a danger of family breakdown.
There is good news: passion, if it exists, does not go away without a trace. You can return it, although you will have to make some efforts. But as the wise say, all truly valuable things do not come easily.
First of all, you need to find the reason why the passion left the relationship. The most common is fatigue from each other. Many people need variety, only then do they feel interest, excitement, passion.
In a relationship between two people there is already an element of monotony - this is a permanent partner. If also every day life together similar to the previous one, there is nothing inspiring and exciting - it is not surprising that mutual attraction disappears.
In this case best way out- come up with something new and unusual. This could be a joint hobby that will be interesting to both, a new exciting project, studying the art of erotic massage or positions from the Kama Sutra. In this matter, you can and should improvise and fantasize.
Another mistake people make when living together is that they stop taking care of themselves. Everyone likes well-groomed, beautifully dressed, sexy.
When a man and a woman are just dating, they see each other exclusively in a favorable light, and later dressing gowns, tights and pajamas appear. When you are at home, pay attention to your reflection in the mirror - how do you rate yourself? Attractive? If not, then urgently think about how to fix it.
It might be worth buying a new robe or sleeping without pajamas. Or use eau de toilette, and women should not rush to wash off makeup and curl curlers - this can be done when the partner is not looking. Gives an erotic effect underwear, which can be worn, if not every day, but a couple of times a week. In general, try to show yourself to your partner in an unsightly manner as little as possible.
Many men notice that their wives have changed after marriage and have lost their individuality. If the bride was interesting and versatile personality, “the life of the party,” then after a few years all her conversations and thoughts are about children or everyday problems. The man is not interested in her, and she herself pays little attention to him.
Therefore, it is so important for a woman to have personal interests, perhaps her own business, as well as to develop spiritually and intellectually in order to be a worthy interlocutor.
Women should also remember that the husband should come first, not the children. First of all, attention should be paid to him, only in this case the relationship will be harmonious and filled with warm feelings.
Bring romance back into your relationship
Rewind the “film of life” a little back and remember the beginning of your relationship. Excitement before dating, timidity and embarrassment, the thrill of first kisses and impatience to merge in a passionate impulse...
Surely now you miss these moments dear to your heart, which somehow disappeared unnoticed, and their place was taken by everyday issues. A great way to revive passion that has faded over time is to return to the beginning of the relationship, at least partially.
Even if you have been living together for many years, you have children and a lot of work, you can set aside some time for romantic date, For example. Remember your most vivid meetings, during which you were overwhelmed with emotions and try to reproduce them. Have sex in the same place you had years ago. Be sure to remember why you fell in love with each other. This will definitely awaken your feelings.
Don’t forget about the signs of attention that are so nice to receive. Give compliments more often, give gifts - even small little things. Take an interest in each other's affairs and admire each other's achievements.
Try to say something pleasant every day, confess your love, touching is required - hugs, kisses. Unbeknownst to you, you will find that your partner literally “blooms” - becomes more attractive and desirable.
Have a holiday!
The best way to escape the ordinary is to arrange something bright and unforgettable just for the two of you. You can please each other with various surprises: a romantic walk or picnic, a weekend spent away from home, a trip that would remind you of your honeymoon.
A great way to “ignite” passion is to arrange a “night of love”, which would begin with a light dinner with champagne and candlelight, then - Erotic massage, smoothly flowing into sexual games. Only this should not be the usual intimacy, but something enchanting. The erection enhancing drug Levitra will help intensify and prolong the sensations. There are also drugs for women, thanks to which sexual relationships become more vibrant.
Miss each other!
According to psychologists, we usually fall in love not with a person, but with his image, which we often come up with ourselves. When does this image have time to form? In those moments when our loved one is not around, but we dream about him. The more we dream and miss, the more we fall in love. Thus, it turns out that another great way to “refresh” a relationship is to miss each other. At the same time, it is advisable to put your imagination to work. For example, one of the partners goes on a business trip or vacation, and in order to “warm up” the feelings of the other, he flirts using means of communication (phone sex, dates on Skype). If you approach the problem creatively, your “other half” will soon begin to ask you to return quickly, and the meeting promises unforgettable moments.
How to bring back passion
Difficulties in relationships
How to bring back passion
Relationships based on passion burn very brightly but fade over time. Relationships based on love and trust last forever. But without passion, they can get boring pretty quickly. Hot sex can revive almost any relationship and bring back the former love of partners.
Everyone wants to have a bright marriage, but over time even it turns into everyday life. But don't worry too much about this. Every girl wants to be loved and desired. So you will fight to regain your passion together.
If the fire has gone out of your sex life
· Find your problem. Perhaps you don’t have sex because you simply don’t have enough time and energy for it. Here you either look for ways and time to have sex, or spend it on something else.
· Find out the reason why sex has become less important. One of the biggest mistakes is that with the advent of children, parents stop caring for each other, and become dad and mom. Being a parent is one of the roles because of which the role of a partner in sex cannot be discarded. You should always try to pay attention to your wife, even when she is with the child.
· Set a goal to improve your sex life. Physical intimacy deserves great attention in a relationship. And it deserves significant changes. Put your children to bed earlier, rather than falling asleep in bed straight away. Help your wife in the kitchen, she always needs attention.
· Ask yourself what you can do to change the situation. Women react quite clearly to changes in men. And also encourage their success if they are involved in this process. Achieve some result and celebrate it with your wife, as if it were her direct merit.
· Getting enough sex is a normal desire of every man. Therefore, set yourself up to the fact that you want to achieve your desire.
· You should not tell your wife that you have a problem with your sex life. Such a statement will show your weakness and desire to give your wife a choice. This is not worth doing. Women love strong men who make their own decisions. The decision to bring passion back into your relationship is yours alone.
· Bring something new to your sex life. Find a way to bring fun, passion, and excitement into your relationship. Have sex in different rooms or cars. Try other poses. Don't be shy about asking your wife to do what you want. There is no need to be ashamed of your fantasies.
· Have a picnic in nature with a bottle of wine and cake. Wine will help you relax, and the sound of nature will bring primitive passion.
· Rent a limousine for a few hours to remember your youth.
· Create anticipation and fuss. Promise that you will go to a restaurant after finishing something. Remind yourself of this every time. And then confront her with the fact that you are going tomorrow. The wife will start running and fussing, and it will be fun.
· Read books together or watch romantic films together.
· Stop acting like an adult. Be children who act up and play.
· Use candles and incense sticks to create a romantic atmosphere, or take a shower or bath together. Don't forget about massage and massage oil.
· Create a skit or dance a striptease. Even if it looks funny. Your wife will definitely like it, and she will want to thank you.
· Don't forget about flowers and romantic evenings in restaurants or cafes. There is nothing more innocent and romantic than dancing with your wife. Every wife wants to be in a movie, so arrange this event for her.
Dear readers! We will be very grateful if you share with us your life experiences or comments related to this topic.
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How to Improve Relationships: The Ultimate Guide
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Imagine that you woke up early in the morning and your woman has already prepared breakfast for you. Joy is visible in her eyes, she is happy that she lives with the best man in the world. She is ready to listen to all your stories, she is ready to support you in any situation. She knows that a man needs to relax, she is ready to give you her tenderness and love. This is what your relationship can be if you are strong. We can teach you this!
Every relationship sooner or later reaches a dead end when only one option is visible - to leave. And it depends only on the man’s competent actions whether he can maintain the relationship, or whether he will have to let his woman go. The problem with many men is that they do not know how to behave in order for a woman to be satisfied with them. And in this book we will teach men how to behave so that relationships never deteriorate.
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If a man can show his strength, a woman will begin to respect, appreciate and love him. And this is the main path to stable and happy relationship. And every man can achieve this, despite his appearance, income level and physical fitness.
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Almost every couple notes that sexual interest in marriage is slowly beginning to decline. Woman’s Day found out together with psychologist Ekaterina Fedorova whether it is possible to fuel passion over many years and how to do it.
The rate of decline in sexual appetite is different for everyone: some people begin to get bored after six months, while others only after 5-7 years. As a rule, the one who was more active in the pre-wedding period, who was a hunter (and this is not always a man), cools down faster. And here the main danger is the transformation of sex into a routine performance of marital duty, which always follows the same scenario.
It is clear that knowledge of each other, including knowledge of the characteristics of sexual behavior, preferences, erogenous zones etc. is a plus. The couple, through trial and error, found the most optimal scenario for obtaining satisfaction. I found it and calmed down. This scenario is played out every evening, and at first everyone is happy with it. But we must not forget that everything becomes boring.
It's like eating your favorite cakes: try to eat them every day and you will hate them. Ideally, the combination of the usual scenario and deviations from it should be in a ratio of 80 to 20. If there are no deviations and experiments, then sex in marriage will become boring.
When people married once and for the rest of their lives (and this was not always the case, remember the Slavic pagan holidays with their shocking sexual revelry, even to us), fasting was invented to maintain sexual interest in marriage.
Abstinence during fasting only fueled sexual interest and allowed the couple to accumulate passion. And there are a lot of posts: 40 days in spring and winter, 2 weeks at the beginning and end of summer, plus every Wednesday and Friday. Although it was believed that if the husband really needed it, then it was possible, but in general men were forced to restrain their desires. This kept the passion alive. Now, you probably shouldn’t force your husband to fast if you’re not both deeply religious, he’ll just think you’re slowly going crazy.
But periods of abstinence won't hurt anyway. This could be business trips, trips. Many women do a period of abstinence after menstruation, which is also not bad.
How much do you need to follow your husband’s lead if a couple of days after the wedding he already needs variety and he insists on it? First of all, do not forget that the path of the victim always ends badly.
You can't let your husband do whatever he wants. If any of his wishes is instantly fulfilled, then he will become completely uninterested in what you want, your desires will no longer be taken into account at all.
In order to have balance and harmony, you never need to fulfill all requests. There must be no-go zones. And let this live on with my husband as an unrealizable erotic fantasy. Only what both want should happen in bed. If your husband invites you to a swingers club, but you don’t want to go there at all, then there’s no need to agree. It's another matter if you're interested. But keep in mind - a swingers club actually transforms your relationship from family to partnership, even friendship. Exclusivity is removed, all that remains is joint farming.
A man whose whims are fulfilled at the first request is an unhappy child who already has all the toys and has nothing more to dream about.
Nothing surprises or pleases him. There must be restrictions. Even if you don't mind fulfilling his whim, it would be nice to say no. Then, in a month or a year, your “yes” will be a gift for him, and not a passing episode. Don’t forget: you and him will still be together long years live, you will still have time to carry out all the experiments and fulfill your fantasies.
In addition to periods of abstinence and forbidden zones, mystery and intrigue will help preserve passion.
The French, for example, never show their cards completely. It is believed that like two crossed wedding rings There is only a small common plane, so in the relationship between spouses there should be a small zone of complete revelation, and everything else should be hidden from the husband. A woman should have her own life, then she will be a “femme fatale” - a woman of mystery, a femme fatale.
For a relationship to have passion, it doesn't have to be smooth.
For this purpose, nature provides a physiological mechanism for changing a woman’s mood. Ovulation - and everything is fine, but closer to menstruation, horror begins: female hormones have fallen, male hormones have risen, and you want to kill everyone.
For half a month we are soft, beautiful and fluffy, and then out of the blue - either tears because I met a sad dog on the street, or screams because my husband put the milk on the wrong shelf in the refrigerator. No man can get used to this, but this variability is not only the cause of quarrels and stress - it is also the key to female attractiveness.
The question of how to return the love of a husband is asked by many women when any doubts about the strength of their family relationships creep into their heads.
Only when any unusual changes begin in the relationship between the spouses does the woman begin to worry and think that she, too, must certainly be returned. Psychologists give enough universal tips on this occasion.
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You can return it, yes. But it's difficult.
Psychologists believe that our habits depend on our internal state. For a woman sometimes it becomes the most important husband, home, family, work, kitchen - everything except herself. Roughly speaking, she stops loving herself. If there is no love for you, then there will be nowhere to get love from the outside. Without self-love, you cannot return your husband's love. Attention! Love and egocentrism are different things, don’t confuse them.
Psychologists also highlight the other extreme. When the wife is perfect. Your legs are always perfectly shaved, your hair is always perfectly neat, your dress is always perfectly ironed. And for whom? Psychologists believe that about 8/10 women try this hard for the sake of men and their attention. Not for yourself, but for someone else. Again: is it possible to return a man’s love when you don’t even love yourself? It seems like different things, but the outcome is the same.
Much more difficult is the question of how to return your husband's love. It would seem that the situation has changed radically - here he has already left for another woman and now it seems like his love belongs to her, that’s it, it can’t be returned. But no! Psychologists believe that this is simply the next stage of an existing problem, that it is just a matter of time.
The key to regaining your husband's respect and love is you. According to the opinions of many psychologists, the main thing is to regain interest in yourself, and then your husband’s love will return.
How to get your husband's attention and love back?
Do you love your husband yourself? This is not about care and guardianship, but about love.
Purposefully thinking about how to return the attention and love of your husband, if you yourself do not have such feelings, is illogical. And no, you can’t say “let him take the steps first, he’s a man.” Psychologists say that you are responsible only for yourself, therefore, if you really want to return your husband’s love, you should consider him as a person, a personality, and love this personality. And you can’t return something that didn’t exist, especially love.
So, how to return a husband's love for his wife? Psychologists believe that in order to return love, sometimes it is enough to analyze the following aspects:
- self-perception;
- self-development;
- your behavior towards your husband.
Psychologists also note that this list is hierarchical - from the first comes the second, from the second comes the third.
Self-perception
Think about what you are for you. How do you perceive yourself? Why you.
Psychologists use these three key questions to determine a woman’s self-esteem and self-love. Therefore, psychologists advise using a very simple test. Take a piece of paper and write 5-10 points for each such question.
What/who are you?
Pay attention to the exact words you used to describe yourself - they will indicate your priorities.
If you first of all wrote that you are a woman, then your gender is fundamental to you. It is quite possible that you justify many of your own and other people’s actions with this. Such people tend to share housework, occupation, mentality, etc. into feminine and masculine.
Think about it: do you have any gender prejudices? Was it ever that someone imposed their concept of a woman on you, putting it in the foreground, and you didn’t have the willpower/desire to stick to your line?
If you have identified yourself as a person with a specific occupation (“artist”, “teacher”, “ballerina”, “scientist”), your emphasis is more on realizing your potential. Think about whether you are sacrificing something very important for the sake of the business that you have chosen as your main one?
Moving forward in your business is great, but psychologists believe that everything should be in moderation. You can't return love if you don't have time for it.
Doesn’t it happen when you brush aside your needs and those close to you in order to complete some project or task?
Psychologists believe that if a woman chooses an elaborate answer to this question (“goddess”, “work of art”, “perfection”, “ True Woman", etc.), there are clear demonstrative or hysterical elements in her behavior. Such ladies are prone to theatrical reactions to many events, as well as manipulation. As psychologists note, returning love with such “window dressing” is quite problematic.
What are you?
These descriptions, according to psychologists, also speak very eloquently about your self-esteem.
If you described mostly external characteristics (“tall”, “beautiful”, “blond”, “large”), psychologists may come to the conclusion that:
- you are a visual person - you receive most of the information using a visual analyzer;
- the attractiveness of your partner is really important to you;
- When winning someone over, you place more bets on your appearance.
Women who described some of their functional characteristics (“hardworking,” “efficient,” “hardy”) are characterized by psychologists as pragmatic. They:
- prefer practice to theory;
- they perceive dreamy people as a lower and infantile class;
- they don’t like typical gifts with a taste of candy romance - banal, stupid and boring.
According to psychologists, ladies who most described their own emotional component (“cheerful”, “irritable”, “harmonious”) are characterized by:
- good intuition and empathy;
- the predominance of sensory perception over intellectual;
- focusing on your perception of situations;
- kinesthetic type of representative system - they receive information using tactile sensations.
If you described personal, including strong-willed, character traits (“purposeful,” “decisive,” “assiduous”), then, according to psychologists, you tend to:
- independence and self-sufficiency;
- selfishness;
- work for results.
Why are you?
The answer to this question, according to practicing psychologists, helps determine goals and priorities. You wrote what you need to realize. Someone wants to become a professional in a certain field, someone wants to raise brilliant children, for some it is more important to create a world-class masterpiece or make a shocking discovery. Some people just want love.
A very important detail: if you have a clear preference towards living for the sake of someone/something, pull yourself together!
Psychologists never tire of repeating that renunciation of one’s own “I”, of one’s nature, indicates a lack of love for oneself as a person. This leads to negative changes in many relationships, including in love.
Self-development
Remember the last time you tried to master something. And not just master it, but master it for yourself. Not for beauty, not for status or a partner, but in order to grow in your own eyes and learn something.
Psychologists believe that if you don’t remember or if you stopped your personal growth because of some nonsense, problems will begin to creep up on every front. If you don’t develop on your own, love cannot be returned.
Behavior
According to psychologists, the most common pathological behavior in a family is the infantilism of one + the guardianship of the other. “Son-mother” or “father-daughter” pairs are formed. Psychologists view this as a codependent relationship that is initially doomed to failure.
Son-mother couples are characterized by the childish irresponsible behavior of the husband-son, which is accompanied by the all-forgiving care of the wife-mother.
- It is typical for such husbands:
- demanding attention and company;
- inability to make decisions independently;
- an indication that someone owes something to someone;
- manipulation to get what you want.
- the eternal craving to do something for her husband;
- obsession;
- tendency to take offense;
appeal to conscience. Father-daughter pairs are characterized by an opposite distribution of roles. The husband-father takes on the dominant role over his wife, and the wife-daughter remains a cute princess with a Barbie doll.
- Such husbands have the following characteristics:
- the desire to educate and reprimand the wife;
- control over the wife’s activities;
emphasizing his wife's dependence on him.
- The wives of this couple are characterized by the following:
- tendency to be capricious;
- irresponsibility;
a demand for abstract care and understanding.
How to rekindle the old passion in a relationship?
That is, there was passion, but due to some reasons it began to wane. The beauty of this is that you already have the experience that can tell you how to return your husband’s former love.
Before you wonder how to rekindle passion and win back your husband's love, remember when you sincerely wanted sex. And if you think for yourself and develop for yourself, as well as have sex purely for your own pleasure, you will no longer worry about how to get back former passion
. And a man’s love will flare up even more if he feels that you are enjoying the process itself, and not your own false dedication “for the benefit of others.” This “for good” destroys families, and it is often impossible to return love.
A separate group includes wives who have sex with their husbands solely for his pleasure. The couple has sex, not the husband! The husband will get his in 97% of the outcome! Think about yourself!
- So, how can you bring passion back into your relationship with your husband? Practicing psychologists believe that you should:
- rethink your attitude towards your husband as a person - appearance is appearance, and excitement, like love, originates in the brain (where it needs to be returned), and not in the genitals;
- and your attractiveness - if you walk around the house stooped, with dirty hair and in a shabby robe, then it is not surprising that it is somewhat difficult to return your husband’s enthusiasm for you;
- overcome shyness and social inhibitions by discussing the issue of sex with your husband - who else should you discuss this with if not with him? love experiments and using them in your– diversity will be a manifestation of your interest in this area, so it will be easier to return passion and love;
- pay attention to your own feelings during lovemaking and don’t focus on returning passion and pleasing your husband - sex for two.
More pragmatic advice from psychologists and psychotherapists regarding how to return the passion and love of your husband is as follows:
- Learn to undress beautifully and gracefully - this is very exciting for about 40% of men.
- About 60% of men love elegant lace lingerie on their wives - buy several sets at different cases life to bring back the spice to your intimacy.
- Don’t be afraid to give a signal that you feel good: if you want to moan, moan, if you want to breathe, breathe. Don't hold back. It is important for a man to clearly record your positive reaction to his activity.
- Remember that 65% of men prefer to alternate between traditional sex and oral sex.
- There are very few men who are psychics. In order for him to understand your desires, it would be best to direct your husband’s hand to the right place. In some cases, you can just say it, but most men prefer the first option.
- Be dynamic - the puritanical days are long gone, and you no longer have to remain in a stable position lying on your back in a long nightgown.
- Train yourself to arch your back. It is beautiful.
How to stir up interest in yourself after the birth of a child?
It should be remembered that for 1 month after the birth of the baby, not only psychologists, but also gynecologists recommend refraining from making love. Psychologists point out that this time is the phase of adaptation of the husband and wife to the arrival of the baby, therefore the sensual part of their life together fades into the background.
During the period of breastfeeding, psychologists note the following nuance: if previously the breast was an object of decoration and pleasure for a man, now it does not belong to him, and the former priorities can no longer be returned. And on an instinctive level, the husband understands this.
The period of the first year after the birth of a child, according to psychologists, is a test of empathy and the strength of the family. Then, normally, sexual relations with your husband should be balanced and move to another level, and there is no need to artificially return them. Of course, love doesn't go away.
It happens that a husband’s attitude towards his wife changes noticeably after the birth of a child.
This is often observed in:
- couples who long time lived together without a child (more than 3 years);
- couples who got married because of pregnancy;
- families where a child is born with health problems.
The new responsibility is obliging and frightening at the same time, which is why many wives after childbirth are faced with the question of how to return passion to their relationship with their husband after the birth of a child.
Actually, how to return passion to the relationship between husband and wife if another small family member has appeared? Psychologists advise the following:
- Get to grips with your self-esteem. She must be returned! Yes, you now have a child, but you have not stopped being a person, you have not stopped being a woman who has a beloved husband. Remember this.
- Clarify with your husband all these subtle nuances of your relationship - without this, there is no way to return love.
- If suddenly you both have a fear that another cute screaming creature will appear at home, and then another and another, the solution is very banal and simple: use contraceptives.
- Learn to relax. Sometimes it's not enough physical strength in order to make love, therefore there is no desire to return the passion.
How to return love to your husband?
And yet, how to return the love of a husband to his wife? A psychologist's advice, as a rule, is based on a specific situation and is developed specifically, taking into account many factors. But any experienced psychologist will tell you that analyzing the above-mentioned personality aspects can help bring back feelings. What should be done, according to psychologists, based on the findings obtained, in order to return the love of your spouse?
If new topics for reflection were found when analyzing yourself, you should take this seriously:
- Don’t tie any traits or antics to generally accepted labels, because a man leaves for another not because he is a man, but because he too lacks something.
- Find a balance between all the areas in which you are involved (family, love, work, education, creativity), and make sure that there is no strong preponderance in one direction.
- Watch your reaction to your usual conversations with your husband: if something causes melancholy, irritation, or some other kind of negative emotions, you should think about the reason for what hurts you.
- Learn to respect other people's opinions: you and your husband may have different positions on the same issues, this is normal.
- Set your priorities in such a way that you can pay attention to yourself and interact with your husband - so that you have time for what you really want to get back.
- If you are confused, do not be afraid to consult a psychologist or psychotherapist.
Start practicing for yourself, not for others:
- Find an activity that you like, not fashion/girlfriends/husband, etc.;
- Stop using lack of time and money as excuses.
When analyzing your own behavior with your husband, in order to return his love, you should:
- Break out of the vicious circle of “boss-subordinate” (“son-mother”, “father-daughter”) and behave like a person who respects other people’s boundaries and interests (if this is really hard for you, an experienced practicing psychologist will help you “get yourself back”) .
- To get rid of addiction in a relationship with your husband - you are different people who have made a strong-willed decision to develop together.
- Learn to be independent.
- Let your husband go if he needs it - to work, to some events, from home. He is also a person, like you, who has the right to dispose of himself.
There is no universal way to do this. Advice from psychologists flashed like red threads at every point. It is noteworthy that an adequate psychologist will not recommend manipulating a man or forcing him to do anything. Psychologists believe that before thinking about how to return love to her husband, a wife should engage in her own self-esteem and self-development.
In addition to the step-by-step analysis methods described above, psychologists recommend using tests based on archetypes and intuitive perception - drawings. Psychologists pay attention to different elements of the picture, each of which denotes one or another area of your perception.
A popular test that determines emotional condition human is the “Non-existent animal” test. It is necessary to use colored pencils so that the test can be interpreted as accurately as possible. Help is needed to properly understand the results of this test. experienced psychologist or a psychotherapist who will assess the overall emotional background the client, his inclinations, and can also diagnose some changes and accents in sexual behavior.
A similar test is “Lamb in a Bottle,” which helps the psychologist determine the client’s attitude to the external environment, to society, and to love.
In some situations, a psychologist may not give a general answer, but one that suits your situation. But then the psychologist needs to delve into your relationship, which is not done online.
Useful video
Psychologists advise first deciding what you want to return. If you are sure that your relationship is fading away, and you really want to return and maintain love, then the game is worth the candle. So, how to return your husband’s former passion and love:
Conclusion
- Psychologists believe that you can return your husband’s love by analyzing your behavior, as well as by changing your attitude towards yourself. You can analyze it yourself, or with the help of some tests, which a psychologist will help you interpret.
- Most psychologists advise spending time with your husband straight Talk, which would dot all the i's.
- It is necessary to engage in self-development - this is partly the answer to the question of how to return love. And your husband’s interest will thus be directed towards you, as well as his attraction.
I bet you're expecting to hear again about things from a sex shop, dressing up in sexy lingerie and flickering candles on romantic dinner. You've probably already tried this, but the tips didn't work, right? When physical attraction disappears, giving way only to spiritual and emotional intimacy (and this is not the worst situation), it makes no sense to start with a combat love arsenal. What should you do?
Relearn sex
Sexual desires are changeable. Years have passed since you met your man, and preferences may have changed. It will probably take time to meet the new bodily manifestation of your “I”. Try to spend more time on this: start reading blogs or watching videos that will help develop your imagination, something described or shown may spark you.
First, you need to learn to talk openly about desires: start the dialogue first, be sincere and unbiased
The partner's sexuality may also have changed. First, you need to learn to talk openly about desires: start the dialogue first, be sincere and unbiased to what your partner tells you. Even if some fantasies seem unacceptable at first, do not rush to immediately report this, let him have the opportunity to be frank with you.
When you understand what changes have happened to both of you, you will stop wasting time trying to revive old unviable sexual scenarios and can start again.
Think about what actions you take that extinguish your sexual desire.
A quarrel over the fact that he again did not take out the trash or scattered his socks can kill a man’s desire. A woman’s desire may fade if her husband stops hugging and kissing her when they meet and gets off with the usual “hello.” We often focus on what we don't like and forget about the feelings of others. Think about what in your behavior may reduce sexual desire partner.
The surest way to “kill” interest is to tell a man that he is a bad lover. Feelings of guilt will not increase the degree of desire, and the very idea of intimacy with a woman who did not appreciate his efforts will cause rejection. Both partners are responsible for the situation in which they find themselves, and only mutual openness and the desire to move forward can help.
Separate sex from everyday life
There is no escape from everyday life: cleaning the apartment, cooking, washing dishes, and activities with children become an integral part of life together. We get tired, we want to relax in pajamas and a robe and not think about how we look. This desire is natural. But the home image should not be transferred to sexual life, turning it into a monotonous ritual.
Take the initiative and change the script: offer to make love at a time when your partner least expects it
Take the initiative and change the script: offer to make love at a time when your partner least expects it. Let it be a meeting at a hotel or quick sex before the children return home.
An important point: it is better to hint to the man in advance what kind of surprise you are preparing. This will set you in the right mood and give you time to prepare mentally. If you decide to pull the number without warning, there is a high chance of meeting resistance; it turns out that he is busy, tired, or in the mood to devote the evening to sports or sleep. Don't take this as a fundamental refusal to change anything. It's just that your proposal might have caught loved one by surprise, so he was not ready to support the proposed game.
Fake it until you believe it
You may have noticed that when you are in a bad mood, but you force yourself to go out with friends, you begin to feel better. Communication, smiles and laughter help you a lot. This approach also works with the fading romance in a relationship. If you don't experience strong desire, start doing things that usually excite you.
At first there will be a strange and not very pleasant feeling, as if you are forcing yourself to do something that should happen naturally. Don’t get hung up on it – the main thing is that you can melt your inner ice. Over time, you will feel that you need very little to experience desire.
The main advice: let something happen between you and your partner this evening. romantic event. Don't put it off until tomorrow.
about the author
Sarah Hages– co-founder of the blog The Sex Talk.
