Two middle-aged “ladies” are riding on a metropolitan trolleybus. One of the others talks about the recently held wedding of her older child: “We walked for a long time in the restaurant, and they were taken home at 11.”
A friend with a knowing half-smile: “First wedding night.”
And then the astonishing answer: “Who’s the first one, they’ve been living together for a long time.”
What is striking is not the fact of cohabitation before the official registration of marriage - this would not surprise anyone now. And not the mother’s attitude towards the child’s premarital sexual experience. Nowadays, parents not only do not try to limit the sexual impulses of their growing children, but moreover, boasting of their breadth and freedom of views, they often even encourage them. The lack of understanding of a man no longer young, worn out by life, of the importance of first wedding night(even if this is not the first night in the joint sexual experience of the bride and groom) in the future married life of young people, taking into account the newly acquired status, responsibilities and rights, future joint joys, sorrows, habits.
It is not news that currently the term “ the wedding night“Only doctors, psychologists, and sex therapists take it seriously. They treat this event not only as their first sexual experience, but also as a very important event for family. This is precisely for a family, and not for a couple of people who have practically no responsibilities to each other, who are not threatened by the demon of addiction, since practically nothing prevents them from leaving an unsatisfactory partner at any time.
Doctors, psychologists and sex therapists, taking into account their professional experience, claim that it is the first wedding night greatly influences the future married life . What is remembered is not the sexual exploits during it (the spouses will have many more nights ahead of them), but:
Stupid and awkward behavior young husband who failed to control his desires, was rude, did not notice or did not take into account the embarrassment or painful sensations of his wife;
Wife's jokes in case of husband's man's mistakes made due to ignorance, inability, nervous and physical condition.
Regardless of whether the newlyweds cohabited with each other before marriage or had other sexual experience, or a rather infrequent case happened when one of them or both turned out to be virgins, their attitude towards each other on that very night is remembered and leaves pleasant memories for the rest of their lives, tact , attention, affection, tenderness and, almost the most important thing, understanding each other, respect, ability and desire to feel the other, his condition, readiness, desire.
Therefore, you should try to make this night pleasantly unforgettable for each other, and following these simple principles will help with this:
About a month before the wedding, start preparing psychologically, physically, organizationally for first wedding night. This applies to both the girl and young man.
Girls should not only take care of their appearance at a cosmetologist and in a lingerie store, but also slightly change your diet. Ayurveda recommends a diet of 4 M's- milk, butter, honey, carrots. This diet will help your eyes become deeper and clearer, your waist thinner, your hair more shiny, your skin acquire the properties of the most delicate silk and an aroma that, they say, teams of the most titled perfumers envy and unsuccessfully try to imitate. And it is also very useful to take care of a small souvenir for the young husband for the first wedding night. Let him just wear slippers, but with your tender note confirming your love and care for him.
It is very important for both a girl and a young man together (with a sufficient degree of trust in each other), or for each individual, to thoroughly study in the literature or in consultation with a doctor or sex therapist the structure and characteristics of the reproductive system of both one’s own and the other sex. A consultation with a doctor is very advisable both to clarify the features of defloration and for advice on how to behave correctly during the first sexual contact. After all, in any case, men now increasingly want to get a virgin as a wife - it has directly become fashionable. But girls will also only benefit from knowing the specifics of deflowering. Also, women and girls, although they may not want this, may have to face a virgin, and here, too, it is better to know how to behave in order to correctly guide him, support him and not cause subsequent problems in his sexual life with an awkward word, action, or behavior.
Think over and take care of the surroundings of the room, where will your wedding night take place?. It is best, of course, to rent a wedding room in a hotel or motel, but if this is not possible, think and organize an apartment or at least a bedroom where you can stay alone, and no relatives or friends will in any case have the opportunity or right enter into it.
Decorate this room:
Flowers (even simple but delicate ones - snowdrops, violets, small carnations or irises);
- melodic music;
- aroma lamp or aroma burner with a few drops of rose or neroli oil, nutmeg, patchouli, sandalwood, rosemary, cedar, jasmine, ylang-ylang, saffron, the smells of which heighten sensuality (however, the seller will tell you); candles; by the bed on the nightstand there are fruits, cheese,
- 1 - 2 light gourmet snacks, taking into account your taste and the taste of the other half, chocolate, pomegranate juice (by the way, according to doctors, it is good for potency) champagne or good wine and also ... pleasantly smelling oils for massage during love foreplay;
- and of course, beautiful bed linen, maybe white (but in no way reminiscent of a hospital room) with sewing and lace. And the cool and slippery surface of beautiful silk or satin lingerie can add spice to the sensations during love games. Make sure that the sheet does not slide off the bed - it is better if it has an elastic band.
It will be more pleasant if all these preparations become a surprise for your other half, so it’s worth thinking about how to do this.
Behind wedding table try to eat, but not heavily. Alcoholic drinks on the wedding night It’s better not to drink at all, and so that friends and family don’t pester you with offers to drink a drop, pour the same pomegranate juice or any other juice into a dark bottle of red or rose wine in advance; even a compote will do, as long as it’s similar in color and thickness to wine. Any alcoholic drinks will only complicate the control of behavior in wedding night, and it will only harm your health at this crucial moment, taking into account all the wedding worries.
It is very important to try not to get deathly tired during the wedding, so that by nightfall the only desire left is to fall and give rest to your aching legs, back, and head.
And the main thing is to leave no later than midnight or go to a secluded room prepared for the first wedding night.
Before the beginning first wedding night Give yourself and your other half time to relax, relieve the wedding stress for yourself and your other half. Talk, listen to music, drink a little champagne or wine, caress each other, help each other relax. Listen to the advice of not only doctors, but also religion - before intimate relationships, be sure to wash yourself, especially your genitals. A shared shower or bath can be a pleasant part of love foreplay that continues in the bedroom. Be patient. Prepare by caressing each other, feel your partner’s desire. On the wedding night Under no circumstances should you rape a woman or a man. If you feel any psychological or physical obstacles, it is wiser to stop at caresses without completing the process - you still have so many nights ahead of you to enjoy sex...
Neither the groom nor the bride should get hung up on the question of the presence of a hymen; its presence or absence in no way guarantees virginity, because this piece of mucous membrane may be absent from birth or due to injury, depending on its structure and elasticity, it may stretch and not rupture, or due to density, require surgical intervention for defloration, and for a relatively small amount of $200 to $600, it can be medically restored even in a woman who has given birth. The sensation of the presence of a hymen can be created in a man by using products such as tampons or thick viscous gels. So it’s better not to search for “is there proof of innocence or not” and trust the woman you married. And a girl needs to remember that the first sexual experience may be painful due to defloration, but this is not necessary, and you should not be afraid of it. Both young people should know that bleeding does not necessarily accompany a rupture of the hymen, but if there is one, the act should not be repeated either on the same night or on a couple of subsequent nights, allowing the wound to heal.
Both young spouses also need to remember that wedding night Doctors strongly advise using a condom, especially in the case of virginity, both for reasons of hygiene, so as not to introduce an infection into the previously almost completely closed female reproductive system, and for reasons of protection from pregnancy. During the first sexual intercourse in women, as a rule, there is no lubrication (secretion of the necessary lubricant) and therefore it is recommended to lubricate the head of the penis with Vaseline, and if sexual intercourse is carried out with a condom, then with a water-based lubricant, for example, Solcoseryl gel or the same Vaseline .
As you understand, in order to know and take into account all the physiological subtleties that are briefly mentioned here, and even more are missed, otherwise the article would have a huge volume, and it is imperative to follow advice 1) and study the specialized literature well or talk to a doctor, and, probably more than once.
Let the tips given in this article help you properly prepare informationally, organizationally, psychologically and physically for your wedding night in marriage. Happiness to you, dear newlyweds and unforgettable pleasant memories of this first night.
Preparing for a wedding requires a lot of effort. After all, you need to think about it a large number of various little things. The celebration should be properly organized so that both the newlyweds and the guests are, of course, satisfied.
However, after the holiday itself, an unforgettable event awaits the husband and wife - their wedding night. It’s also worth thinking about it in advance so that it will be remembered by young people. It is on their wedding night that the newlyweds are finally left alone. Now they can relax and enjoy each other. Now we will talk about how to prepare for your first wedding night, how to make it unforgettable.
What is the first romantic night?
Many people getting married do not fully know the answer to this question. They also do not understand how it should go and what it symbolizes.
Of course, for newlyweds, the first wedding night is a truly romantic time. It symbolizes the foundation new family. During the wedding night, the newlyweds are finally alone and can devote time to each other. In the morning, a new, so to speak, “adult” life will begin. And the wedding night becomes the starting point family relations.
Preparation
Young people do not always know what to do at this time, how to behave correctly. However, we note that the first wedding night is no different from the subsequent ones that you will spend with your spouse after the wedding. The only difference is that the first time the newlyweds try to please each other with surprises so that it becomes unforgettable.
How should the groom prepare for the night?
In many ways, it depends on the future spouse how the first wedding night after the wedding will go. After all, organizational issues fall on his shoulders. The most important thing in this matter is to find a suitable romantic place. If you don’t have your own apartment, then you can spend your wedding night in a house on the lake or in a hotel. However, unfortunately, not everyone can afford this. Many newlyweds do not understand how they can spend this unforgettable night at home. Then the parents leave the apartment to the children for this time.
Regardless of which location is chosen, it must be carefully prepared. It is advisable that this be a surprise for your beloved. Prepare and carefully lay clean, beautiful (for example, red) bed linen. Rose petals should be scattered on the floor and on the bed. You can make words of love from candles or arrange them in the shape of a heart.
Can be arranged romantic dinner in a warm bath. There you can drink champagne (or red or white wine) and eat some fruit or dessert. Such a beautiful first wedding night will remain in the memory of your beloved for a long time. It is worth making every possible effort to ensure that everything goes great.
The wedding night. What should the bride do in front of her?
We need to prepare for the first night. It is necessary to think over the outfit in which you will appear before your betrothed. For example, it could be sexy lace white lingerie, stockings and shoes high heels in tone Your husband must be 100% sure that he has chosen a real queen as his legal wife.
The first wedding night should be sensual and romantic. There is no need to be shy at this moment. You can arrange for him to dance a beautiful dance to pleasant or favorite music. Movements should be thought out and prepared in advance so that they are natural and harmonious. Then the first night will be remembered by both spouses.
Despite the fact that your beloved will now officially become legal spouse, you need to continue to please and surprise him, otherwise the relationship will simply dry up. Many girls are interested in what can be done on their wedding night and what not? Let's look at this topic in detail.
So what can you do:
- Behave naturally and at ease. Sincerity is the main highlight loving girl.
- Laugh, joke and flirt.
- Dance a striptease to your loved one, perform songs for him and dedicate to him. The main thing is that everyone has fun, and the evening and night pass in a relaxed atmosphere.
What not to do:
- Reproach and quarrel. On the first wedding night, it is forbidden to look for reasons to sort things out. After all, this is a time of love and tenderness.
- Be vulgar.
- Trying to be someone you really are not. Men quickly sense falsehood.
Wedding night in Russia. What customs and traditions are known?
In ancient times, preparation for this night was a real ritual. Since it was believed that it was during this period that the foundation of the family was laid.
After the wedding, the newlyweds went to spend the night with their spouse’s parents. At the same time, the room had to be cool. The bed for the young was the following design: sacks of flour and rye were placed on a wooden flooring. This was done so that the family would be rich.
Pillows and mattresses were placed on the bags. This “bed” was covered with a white sheet, the ends of which had patterns. A speedo and a poker were placed under the bed. These items brought healthy children and happiness to the family.
After the celebration, everyone escorted the spouses to the hut. The first to go were girlfriends and boyfriends who came in and paid ransom to the women who protected the bed. Afterwards they beat the marriage bed with a whip. This is how they drove away evil spirits from him. The newlyweds were kept in private, under lock and key. There was a man behind the door who protected the husband and wives from drunken guests.
Muslims' first wedding night
On the first night, the husband is expected to take his wife's virginity. The husband does everything to please his wife. He is trying to liberate her, excite her. The girl also needs to express her feelings for her husband, to show that she wants intimacy with him.
Of course, it may also happen that intimacy does not happen on the first night after the celebration. This can be corrected later. Fortunately, the tradition of suffering a cold with the blood of a virgin has already become obsolete. Most often, such a ritual is even considered forbidden.
First night in Islam
This night is full of sacraments and temptations for both the wife and the husband. This special time will be remembered by both. The first wedding night among Muslims is especially memorable for a girl, since it is the first time she finds herself away from home. Now she will spend the rest of her life with her husband.
Note that the girl is innocent, so the husband should not forget about tenderness. How should a night like this begin? Islamic prayer is the key to a successful start to intimacy. An integral attribute of foreplay is beauty in clothing.
Young people cover each other with honey and sweets. Then they turn to Allah. They ask him to give them the same sweet life. Of course, love and financial well-being should prevail in it. This procedure relaxes the newlyweds before intimacy and gives them special tenderness. Sometimes intimacy postponed. This usually happens due to critical days at the bride's.
A man should be delicate and gentle. The wife must undress herself so that her husband does not frighten her with his behavior. A spouse should never be rude. There should be only affection and tenderness. The main rule for a spouse is to give more on the first night, and you will receive more from your beloved in the future. In addition, you should ask Allah for blessings. He must send the spouses a strong union, in which there will be love for everyone, as well as a large number of children. To do this, the husband touches his beloved’s forehead and asks for it. There should be a place for love affairs.
Other countries. What traditions do they have?
It seems that everyone knows how the wedding night goes and when. But all countries have their own customs that everyone should learn about. Such information may even change your understanding of the features of the night after the wedding. So let's look at some traditions:
- In Medieval Europe, a young woman had to spend the night with her overlord, and not with her husband.
- Some time ago, in Scotland it was accepted that intimate intimacy should not take place on the first night. For this purpose, guests are all possible ways distracted the bride and groom, not leaving them alone for a minute.
- In China, choosing the right place to spend the night is very important. Black and red candles in the shape of a dragon are placed near the bed.
- In Macedonia, young people were locked in the basement. They put a hat and boots in the corner. The couple fought with these things. In this way, they proved who was boss in the house. In the morning they were released, after which it became clear who was boss in the house.
- In Japan, there is a tradition that young people retire to one of the islands of the country. First, the spouses feed each other, then present gifts. Husband gives fabric to his wife. And the wife presents her protector with a beautiful sword. He uses it to cut the donated fabric. From larger piece A dress is sewn from material for the wife, and from less material - an outfit for the first child.
A trembling time, full of secrets, excitement and expectations. How to properly prepare yourself for a magical sacrament?
The first wedding night in Islam is a special time. A girl who has just left her parents' home meets a man for the first time. She is modest and innocent. That is why the husband should be especially gentle and careful with her. The Prophet said that women are like flowers: they are beautiful, but their petals are delicate and fragile. A man should treat his wife on the first night like a delicate, vulnerable flower. What does Islam say about the sacrament? The first wedding night should begin with prayer. Beautifully dressed, anointed newlyweds, left alone, can treat each other to juice and sweets, and then separately perform two rak'ahs of prayer, asking Allah to fill their lives with happiness, love and abundance. Namaz, which has a powerful psychological effect, will help the newlyweds calm down and get into the right frame of mind. The wedding night (Islam does not prohibit intimate relationships at this time, but does not insist on them) should take place in an atmosphere of tenderness. Naturally, if the night falls during a woman’s physiological days, then intimacy should be postponed to another time.
Patience and delicacy
A husband should not undress his wife: this can greatly embarrass an innocent girl. It is better to take off your clothes behind a screen, and you can get rid of your underwear in bed, under the covers. The first wedding night in Islam should take place in the dark: this way the newlywed will be less embarrassed and will not be frightened by the sight of a man whom she sees naked for the first time. A man should not rush, he should not act rudely. Tactlessness can lead to the fact that the bride will forever have an aversion to the sacrament of marriage. The first wedding night in Islam is an opportunity for the spouse to show the affection, tenderness and tolerance characteristic of a real man. In order to receive much later, a man must give more on the first night. When the newlyweds go to bed, the husband should lay his hand on his wife’s forehead and ask Allah to bless the marriage and its sacrament, to send many children and give the spouses mutual love and understanding. After this, the young can begin mutual caresses and love games. If a man is skillful and delicate, then the girl will gradually begin to relax, she will stop being embarrassed, and will begin to shower her husband with tenderness and affection. There is no need to rush into defloration: a rough act can cause vaginismus in a girl. This disease, which is expressed in painful spasms female organs, can forever ruin the intimate side of a couple’s life.
Advice to relatives
In some families, it is customary to wait for the end of the wedding night at the door of the newlyweds, in order to be sure that the young woman is a virgin. Such an attitude can cause deep emotional wounds to young people, especially the bride. This cannot be done. Islam prescribes not to peep or spy on others. Waiting at the door and then displaying the sheets is nothing more than a violation of the injunctions of the Koran, leading to haram. The first wedding night in Islam should forever remain a sacrament, the details of which are known only to two.
Preparing for a wedding is the most exciting event for a girl. There is so much to choose, think through and prepare that your head is spinning. Restaurant, dress, hairstyle, bouquet, guests - all this occupies your thoughts from morning to evening. You've probably already flipped through dozens of thematic magazines and studied no less than Internet sites, but you haven't lost sight of one more important point upcoming event? How about your wedding night? Are you ready to make it special and unforgettable, as it should be for newlyweds? We hope our tips will help you with this.
What to do on your wedding night
· Decide where exactly the merger of your loving souls and bodies will take place. Perhaps it will be a luxurious room for the newlyweds in a hotel, where the staff will take care of everything, or perhaps after the celebration you will return to your own apartment, where there should be an appropriate atmosphere that needs to be thought out. Turn your bedroom into a love nest, where there will be no place for bad moods or strangers. This night should be just for the two of you, so everything is in your hands.
· It is clear that both newly-made spouses are eager to unpack gifts and count the money donated for the wedding, but this activity is definitely not for the first wedding night. Do not spoil the romantic mood with materialistic moments. Save your zeal for sexual pleasures and pleasure with each other, and not for gifts from relatives and friends.
· Create romantic atmosphere You can do it without the notorious rose petals and candles. Of course, if it pleases you, then decorate your bedroom as you wish, but first of all, take care of the sexual underwear, in which your husband will see you on this special night.
· An equally important point in planning the first wedding night should be the menu. Choose your drinks at your discretion and chill them in advance. And as a snack, it is better to prefer seafood, since they are the best aphrodisiacs.
· You can relax after a busy day and relieve stress by taking a bath together. Candles, music, foam and aromatic oils - at your discretion.
· The wedding night is the best time to remove former inhibitions in sex and experiment with images and roles. Show your imagination, try on various erotic images and think over a scenario for intimate play. This will make your sex especially memorable.
We live in the modern age, when the first wedding night of newlyweds is almost always a convention. Many young people, even before marriage, enter into intimate relationships or even manage to live together for a while. But this is not a reason to neglect a special moment that symbolizes the transition to a new level of your relationship. Approach this with responsibility and enthusiasm and discover the joy of sexual intimacy in a new way.
First wedding night - what to do? To begin with, I would like to note that in the classical sense this concept is rare today. Newlyweds most often already have sexual experience, which they acquired before the wedding. But there are also exceptions. It is worth considering them and answering the question: “First wedding night - what to do?”
In a relationship between two lovers, several types of behavior can be distinguished. For example, "Romeo + Juliet". This means that both the guy and the girl are virgins. Something - and this is truly rare. And the fact that this couple has new experiences ahead and the discovery of a world unknown to them is great. So, in this case, to the question “first wedding night - what to do?” It is worth giving the following answer: “Relax - and surrender to feelings and emotions.” The process will only begin when thoughts fade into the background, and waves of languor and bliss take over the bodies of the newlyweds. You just need to relax and enjoy yourself, and not force things because somewhere in the subconscious there is a fear of not being able to do something. A man should remember: there is no need to be surprised or afraid. After all, at this moment the girl wants to see a confident and strong man, and not a timid and fearful boy. She wants to know that she trusts herself to the right person. And the girl herself should listen to the call of her body and heart.
Discussing the topic "First wedding night - what to do?" One more fact is worth noting. After the first sex, a woman may not lose her virginity because it is very strong or elastic. It cannot be broken by an inexperienced man in one go. In this case, there is no need to be afraid. It’s worth finishing what you started after five days.
Another option for a relationship in a couple is “Petrarch and Laura”. This situation occurs more often. The girl had no experience before marriage, and the man was experienced. Many guys are afraid to deflower their chosen one. For different reasons. Some people find it unpleasant, others are afraid that she will be hurt.
There are pitfalls in this business, as in any other. For a girl, the newlywed night is not an ordinary sexual experience. Experts have proven that first sex has a huge impact on the emergence of sensuality. The slightest tactlessness - and the girl will have a negative attitude towards sex life. Frigidity may even develop. Experienced man Be sure to first prepare your partner for intimacy. Simply put, foreplay helps. Only then will it be possible to begin the main process.
This also happens: the girl is already a goddess in sex, and the guy is a virgin. Well... then all the initiative is in the hands of the young lady. She has to make sure that her husband does not get nervous and feels confident. After all, this may hurt his feelings - that his chosen one has experience, but he is still “staying too long,” so to speak.
Finally, the first wedding night is also important for those who already have experience in sex: the solemnity does not disappear! A girl always expects something special from her first “official” relationship. Don't forget about this. To make the first night even more enjoyable for the newlyweds, you can drink beforehand delicious wine, have something to eat. And, of course, the atmosphere. A dimly lit room, clean, beautiful linen, flowers, and music will fill your wedding night with romance that you will remember all your life.
