The thought of a “soulmate” is a matter of mystery, confusion and heartache throughout human history, and today people still ask this question. If your soul mate exists in this world, then how to find it?

Regardless of your stance, you can take the tips below and apply them to many other aspects of your life, including finding your soulmate.
These 10 tips will help you find the one you've been looking for.

1. Make a list of qualities that you would like to see in your potential partner.

You may be thinking, “How can you make this stupid list? Better help me find my soulmate!” Yes, it may seem like a stupid idea to some, but the law of attraction works in mysterious ways. After all, thoughts always materialize in concrete form, and putting them down on paper can help speed up the process. Putting your thoughts into written words will also allow you to visually observe the traits you would like to see in a partner. And it can help you imagine exactly what your ideal soulmate would look, sound, and act like.

2. Don't sit idly by.

It may seem uninteresting, but you'd be surprised how many people just sit there and wait for their significant other to finally come knocking on their door. Do you understand, right? Everyone wants to get rich without doing anything for it! But to attract and meet your soulmate, you must be willing to show your true face, stay real and don’t give up on being your best self. Try to unashamedly present yourself to the world without fear of consequences. You never know who you might meet in the most unexpected places. But first you need to put yourself in a favorable situation where this could happen.

3. Love yourself.

You cannot attract love if you are not at peace with yourself. So be sure to love yourself right now for who you are. How can you do this? Simple enough: accept yourself, be kind to yourself, and honor yourself. Loving yourself is not vain or arrogant. It simply means that you respect yourself enough to be confident in your own uniqueness. To let you into your life more love, you need to revive it in yourself. And only then will you be able to illuminate everything and everyone around you. But isn’t all living things drawn to the light?

4. Completely understand yourself and your character.

Just like with self-love, you cannot fully understand others or expect them to understand you unless you have spent time and thought deeply about it. You need to dig out of yourself and reveal all those secrets that you didn't even know about before. They concern only you, so there is nothing dangerous or shameful about it. To attract your soulmate, you must evaluate and understand who you were, who you are now, and who you want to become in the future. Knowing yourself will also attract other people. They will be able to appreciate you more deeply and meet you halfway if they like you.

5. Start saying YES to your life.

It's hard to meet your soulmate if you always say no to new situations or opportunities. If you do this often, practice doing the opposite and open up new doors. This doesn't mean you need to say yes to everything that comes to hand. If your instincts are telling you that you shouldn't do this, then listen to that sixth sense. Saying yes isn't that hard. For example, join that dance club that you have long dreamed of joining, change your place of residence, go to another country, etc. Do everything that you wanted to implement, but for some reason have not yet done it. And go towards fate, which itself will show you the way and give you your soulmate. Life is meant to be enjoyed and given without reserve, so start living!

6. Listen to your sixth sense.

Sometimes you will meet people in the strangest and most wonderful ways. Usually, this happens because you listened to your intuition. Following your feelings means that you will strive for those things that you secretly would like to receive or feel. You may have been in situations like this before, where you went to places you didn't want to go, or met that person from your past that you would rather not have met. Learn to follow your sixth sense.

7. Pay attention to the signs of fate.

We've talked about this many times, but the universe communicates with us through earthly signs, such as playing a memorable song on the radio every time we get into the car, when we pay attention to the time on the clock, or even force ourselves to daydream about something. Pay attention to these signs and messages because they can significantly impact your life and point the way to your soulmate.

8. Open your heart to love.

Obviously, to attract a partner, you need to accept the love that you give to yourself and equally accept the love that is given to you. Even if you have suffered in the past from difficult relationships (and this has happened to everyone, isn’t it?), do not distance yourself from this bright feeling. Just learn from your mistakes and draw conclusions, transform this pain into passion and love for life. Accept your pain, but don't become related to it. Pull yourself together and take the path of love and compassion.

9. Believe that good things are yet to come.

For positive things to happen in your life, you must first believe that you deserve them. Believe that these changes and events are just around the corner. The universe may not send you what you want right away. But don't despair and keep looking forward. Gradually, this will become your new reality and the force with which you will move forward.

10. Don't resist reality, just live.

Even if you have not yet met anyone with whom you could feel spiritual or emotional closeness, this does not mean that this will continue in the future. Just enjoy the present moment as best you can and don't get too caught up in what the future holds.
Live now! So you will understand that even the little you have can bring a lot of positive emotions. As they say, everything around immediately becomes brighter and even the grass begins to turn green before our eyes.

We often call a soul mate a person close in spirit, with whom we feel very good and with whom we feel trust and openness. The loved one could be a man, your childhood friend, or someone from your family. Perhaps this person will turn out to be like-minded in some common cause, and at some point you realize that you are very similar and have a lot in common. You will strive to share both joy and sadness with him, and you will feel good from the fact that you will be listened to and understood.

You have the same lifestyle, interests and goals, point of view on certain things, all this says only one thing - you are ideal for each other. But if you go deep and think, do these kindred souls really exist or is it just a myth, a special name for people with whom we just feel good and comfortable? “Let's look into this issue together! “says psychologist Vlada Berezyanskaya.

Vlada Berezyanskaya

Who are soul mates?

In fact, there are several interpretations of the concept of “soul mates”. The first relates to a couple in love and recognizes that there is only one soul mate in the world - this is your soul mate. When you meet her, you become one and exist together harmoniously. Secondly, it says that there can be many kindred souls. These are the people who help a person through life, contribute to his worldview and perception of the world, and help at certain stages of life. Some of them stay with the person forever, while others, having done their job, leave.

If we analyze both interpretations, we can agree with both of them. On the one hand, there may be several soul mates, but in any case a person evaluates relationships with all people differently. For example, it doesn’t happen that you love two close friends equally - you still love one of them more, trust more, support, etc. The same thing with men - you marry one person, despite the fact that that you had relationships with others before him. Therefore, on the other hand, a soul mate is one.

How to find a soul mate?

In movies, kindred spirits meet very beautifully. Music plays, the characters move slowly and, as if in a haze, meet their gaze. Such meetings are possible in life, but as practice shows, a meeting with a soul mate occurs in exactly the same way as a meeting with an ordinary new acquaintance - calmly and without special effects.

If we talk about what needs to be done in order to find a soul mate, then I will list all the same things that I recommend doing for those who want to find new relationships and love in life. It is necessary to get rid of all the burden of the past, clear your mind of anger and resentment, and achieve harmony with your soul and body. And therapy, relaxation practices and meditation will help you with this.

Myth or reality?

Kindred spirits can be a reality. However, I would not recommend that those who have found such a person, who have found a soul mate, relax. After all, relationships are always work. Many people forget about this, citing the fact that it’s so good and comfortable with a soul mate, a soul mate will understand and forgive everything, which means you can relax and rely on the role of “higher powers.” This is wrong! Having met your soul mate and secured your union in any way - marriage, friendship, cooperation, always remember that relationships, be they friendly or love, always require work. You can become true soul mates when you understand and fully understand what you expect in a relationship and begin to build these relationships.

How to determine that you have found your soul mate?

Sit down and think about a certain person– how long and well have you known each other, do you feel comfortable and relaxed with this person? It happens that people live together for several years and do not feel that state of complete trust and warmth. And vice versa - sometimes you meet someone, you know the person for 5 minutes, but it seems to you that you have known him all your life.

Determine for yourself whether you are playing your usual role or behaving naturally. What kind of roles could these be? For example, many girls, when meeting a man, begin to flirt unnaturally. It’s even more likely not to flirt, but to play a certain role, choose a different behavior that is not typical for them in real life– if a girl is super-caring, she begins to pretend to be indifferent, etc. Men may not call for several days, letting the girl know that they are not interested in a relationship, when in fact the opposite is true. So soul mates don't play such games. They bare themselves in front of each other - they are not afraid to show themselves, their pros and cons, because there is trust and sincerity in the relationship.

Feel it emotional connection. Here you need to monitor your feelings very well. What kind of feelings could these be? The feeling that you have known each other all your life, the feeling that this person is, in some sense, a part of you, the feeling that you are the same emotionally and spiritually, etc.

Find out what his life values ​​are. You start communicating with a person and within the first hour you find out that he holds the same views, you have similar plans for life, common interests, etc.

The most important rule that will allow you to develop soul kinship is open conversations about what is important for you to get in a relationship. Say everything that worries you and don’t think that anyone will read your thoughts. We don't have a fortune telling ball and we don't know how to guess another person's thoughts.

Vlada Berezyanskaya, psychologist Photo: stills from the film “More than Love”

The concept of “soul mates” can be interpreted in different ways. The theory of reincarnation, or multiple reincarnation, states that a certain group of souls are united by family ties long before they “arrive” on Earth. When they meet in real world, a feeling instantly arises between them mutual sympathy and absolute harmony in communication.

Similar feelings and thoughts, the same views on life, tastes and even gestures are only a small part of what is characteristic of kindred souls. According to the theory of reincarnation, the energies of like-minded people vibrate at the same frequencies, so they intuitively feel each other, understand each other perfectly and provide mutual assistance in overcoming obstacles that they encounter along the path of life.

How many soul mates does a person have?

There are two principles in this regard different opinions. Some believe that there is only one true soul mate in the world. When she finds her “soul mate,” she forms an ideal tandem with her. It is figuratively called the “oversoul”, which has two physical bodies.

Others say that a person can have several soul mates. IN in this case we are talking about friends, parents, acquaintances and random people who help us find ways out of difficult situations, provide internal support and nourish energy. It is believed that each soul mate has a clearly defined task, so at certain moments in a person’s life they may suddenly appear specific people, which, having completed their “mission”, also suddenly disappear.

How to find a soul mate?

From birth, a person unconsciously searches for his soul mate. However, in order to meet her, you need to thoroughly study your inner world, your energy, because only in this way can you realize what your other half should be like.

First of all, a person must understand himself, understand what he really wants. It is important that he decides how his soul mate can make him truly happy. Only then will he be open to new relationships and will be able to choose that one soul among the thousands of people he meets.

Sometimes it happens that fate independently presents gifts and brings close people together; in such situations they say that they were destined to meet each other. Initially, they may not even feel close, but over time they will definitely merge into a single whole.

Girls, do you really love it when your boyfriend leaves the toilet seat up? Men, there's nothing cuter than when your crush is clearly upset about something but refuses to admit it? Sarcasm aside, these are just a couple of examples of the unpleasant things you can face when you're in a relationship. But it is worth recognizing that no relationship will be perfect, because not a single person in the world is ideal. Naturally, this does not mean that every person does not want to find an ideal partner who would be perfect for him, with whom he could one hundred percent share his feelings and life values. Have you found it yet? Here are eight signs that you have just such a person next to you.

Your soulmate accepts you for who you are.

The main problem that ruins many relationships is the widespread belief that every person should change their partner. It includes various moments, from requiring your partner to change their taste in fashion to changing their personality traits. Whether it's about clothes or personality traits, a true soulmate will never pressure you to change. On the contrary, such a person will accept you for who you are.

Your soulmate will never mislead you

Do you feel irritated because you never understand how your partner is feeling? Can't understand why your partner is upset, but when you ask directly, you get the answer that everything is fine? A soulmate will always talk to you directly because they understand that the key to a successful relationship is the ability to be open and honest about what is bothering you at the moment. Once you know what happened, you can work together to solve the problem, no matter how big it is.

Your soulmate will accept your opinion

There is no relationship in which both people always agree one hundred percent on everything. You may take a very strong position on a particular issue, while your significant other takes the opposite position. But instead of allowing disagreement to damage your relationship and create tension in it, a true soulmate understands that sometimes the best thing to do is admit that you can't reach an agreement on certain issues.

Your soulmate may not always like you, but she will always love you.

Contrary to popular belief, better relationship- these are not those in which there are never quarrels. Sometimes one of the partners will irritate and piss off the other. This may be the result of stress at work, disagreement on certain issues, or a combination of several factors that lead to a well-known state called “boiling”, and then to an outburst of aggression. But what makes a soulmate stand out from all other people is that she may not like you at that moment, but she will still always love you.

Your soulmate believes in mutual satisfaction

Healthy and active sex life is very important for relationships. Sex is a reminder of love and passion, reduces stress levels and simultaneously supports emotional and physical connection, without which no relationship can exist. A soulmate understands that the key to good sex is mutual satisfaction. Simply put, in good relations sex is not about satisfying the needs of only one partner.

Your Soulmate Accepts Your Physical Disadvantages

You may be worried about the cellulite on your legs, the big scar on your arm, or the mole on your forehead, but you don't have to worry about your soulmate, since this person will never attach importance to your physical flaws. He understands and appreciates the beauty of imperfection, so you should follow his example.

Your soulmate shares your interests

Do you like to draw, sculpt or run? If your partner understands how much pleasure your hobby brings you, you have found your soul mate! Such a person will never tell you that you are wasting your time if you are enjoying your activities. He will enthusiastically support you as you pursue this or that goal. He will always appreciate your talents, and in some cases, he may even join you.

Your soulmate won't be jealous of you

Trust is very important if you want your relationship to be successful. A soul mate understands that complete trust between partners means that she cannot give in to jealousy. If your partner is always open with you, discusses his feelings about the relationship with you, and also understands that a couple should not spend every minute of their free time together, then you have most likely found your ideal person.

Is it true that each of us has a soulmate? Why does the wait take so long in some cases? long years and could it happen that we will not meet her at all?

Slender, elegant Simone and short, blind Jean-Paul. But she, despite his outward unsightliness, admired his intellect, and he never hid that more than anything else he was afraid of losing her. Their relationship could not be called standard: they never lived together, did not have children together and were open to any experience of “free love”.

Nevertheless, common views on life and a supernatural spiritual connection helped them withstand all the trials and maintain their union. Over time, fame, money, recognition, connections on the side blurred and faded, like the colors in a painting. Only Simone remained at the bedside of the sick Jean-Paul.

He died in 1980, she died six years later, almost to the day. The famous intellectual spent the rest of her days in an apartment whose windows overlooked the cemetery where the most main man in her life.

Their love was similar to the feelings of Cleopatra and Mark Antony, whose passion inspired the masterpieces of many writers, artists and directors. Outwardly, Cleopatra had nothing in common with Elizabeth Taylor, who played the queen in the famous film. And Mark Antony was far from Richard Burton. And yet he lost his head in love, renounced his official wife and Rome...

History knows many more such couples - Napoleon and Josephine, Catherine the Great and Grigory Potemkin, John Lennon and Yoko Ono. They all accepted each other with all their flaws. They loved me more than others and did not force me to compromise.

From the outside it seemed that they were connected by strong invisible threads and that one always knew what the other was silent about. This vivid examples kindred spirits who were lucky enough to meet each other.

How to find kindred spirits

Fortunately, fate gives gifts not only to the rich and famous. Everyone, without exception, has the opportunity to find their soul mate. We didn’t have an acquaintance with Kostya as such - we met our eyes and recognized each other. It’s as if we were lost from sight for some 28 years and now, please, we’ve been found again.

From the first seconds I had the feeling that we had known each other for a thousand years, that this man was reading my thoughts. I remember we went into a restaurant to have lunch, and at the next table sat a young couple with a six-month-old baby. Kostya walked away, and I admired the tiny hands tormenting paper napkin, and feet in pink socks.

At that moment, I really wanted to become a mother myself... But I couldn’t voice my desire, because Kostya and I had known each other for almost a week. “It would be great if we had such a nice baby!” - I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard his voice. In general, the more we got to know each other, the more it seemed to me that I was him, with the only difference being that he was a man and 5 years older than me.

I had no doubt that this was the person who was destined for me from above and who would never leave me. Next to him, I always felt warmth, recognition and incredible closeness, and our relationship developed naturally and effortlessly.

When friends, looking at our happy couple, they asked how to find a soul mate, I answered the following: if you met someone and are forced to present yourself in the best light, masking the unsightly sides of your character and abandoning your own weaknesses, then a new acquaintance, alas, is not your destiny.

We all want to believe that our soulmate is walking the earth somewhere... That, just like us, she is not afraid of airplanes, knows how to laugh at stupid things, has a thirst for adventure, has a weakness for raccoons and is absolutely self-sufficient. That she will fit perfectly into the complex puzzle of our lives and, despite differences in views, will be able to find her way to our heart.

This is not just a romantic fantasy that is used for commercial purposes, such as on countless dating sites offering to find a soul mate... You just feel like you are missing someone you have never met. That at first glance, you have everything for happiness - a solid bank account, a job you love, and even a person who, to some extent, makes you happy...

And yet some an important part absent. Once you find your soulmate (read - true love), you will be able to fully open up, change, go beyond your own boundaries and achieve success.

Or maybe she isn't there?

Not all psychologists recognize the existence of a soul mate. Some believe that crazy love at first sight is nothing more than a trick of memory - in appearance, the character and voice of the person who awakened passion in your soul have familiar features.

The same ones that resurrect pictures from childhood and activate the “red button” in the brain, after which the security systems are turned off and a powerful stream of feelings, destroying everything in its path, overwhelms you from head to toe. That is, the attraction between people, which violates all laws, is based on recognition.

An indispensable condition for the meeting of two halves in this context is personal maturity, self-knowledge and readiness for new relationships. A soul mate is someone who has the keys to our locks, and whose locks our keys fit into. Then we are loved for who we are, and not for who we try to be.

Everyone opens best sides another. And despite everything that makes us suffer, with this person we feel well-being like in heaven. "A soul mate is someone who shares our deepest aspirations..." Richard Bach

Others believe that soul mates are a myth. Statistics show that 50% of marriages end in divorce, meaning one out of two couples who vow to love each other for the rest of their lives go in different directions.

“The theory of halves is nothing more than romantic story, invented in Vedic culture. - says Marina Lukyanova, psychologist, organizer of the Anima women's festival. - In fact, there can be either a lot of such “halves” or none. It all depends on the views and stereotypes of a particular person.

If he believes that he has found his happiness, then in spite of all difficulties he will desperately fight for it. Even if the happiness is illusory. But it happens that a person spends his whole life looking for his ideal, without giving real people a chance to be happy next to him.”

Frank Pittman, a psychiatrist from Atlanta, assures that nothing brings so much suffering and disappointment. like searching for a soul mate. In his opinion, we are chasing ghosts because there is no soul mate in nature: “We must stop believing in this myth. All people who are married or in any other relationship belong to different strata, different families and have different views on life. This is fine. Moreover, it allows you to expand your horizons and see the world through the eyes of your partner.”

His colleague Joshua Coleman from San Francisco believes that the universal obsession with the soulmate is the “fruits” of a social philosophy that encourages having the best in life, including the ideal love relationship. He himself supports the general point of view of American psychologists that a soul mate does not exist.

Have you found your soul mate?

And yet, most of us give preference to the heart rather than the head. And he wants to have a person nearby who does not try to change us, but accepts us as we are.

If you are still single, it means that not all life lessons have been learned and there are still things that you need to learn on your own. This explanation is offered by Richard Bach in his book “Bridge Over Eternity.”

He first saw his soul mate in the hotel elevator, and after a while fate brought them together again to work on a film based on his book: “I never for a moment doubted her existence, because I almost met her everywhere.”

However, they have already gotten along quite well mature people. By that time, Richard had flown more than one thousand hours, written several books and became fabulously rich. Leslie succeeded as an actress and was well known in Hollywood.

The main characters of the film “The Bridges of Madison County” are also middle-aged and, moreover, not free. Francesca has a family - a faithful, devoted husband and two children, without whom she cannot imagine her life. Robert is a photographer, free as the wind, who has flown around the wildest corners of the planet. It is difficult for him to imagine how it is possible to live in one place.

However, their relationship shows what kindred spirits are like. He likes her in any dress, with any makeup and in any mood. He sees in her more than others - not an ordinary American housewife, but an interesting, deep woman whose family prevented her from realizing herself. They love the same music, the same poetry. Such feelings are a gift that is given once in a lifetime.

A soulmate is always an ally who takes your side in any situation. Sometimes it seems that he senses you from a distance: as soon as you pick up the phone, a familiar melody sounds. There is passion and harmony in your relationship, and everything you do together brings success.

You can trust him completely and know that there is no subtext in what he says or does. Soul mates erase the concepts of time and space, because they live in complete symbiosis, which does not recognize any earthly restrictions, including age.

Look at Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher - the difference of 15 years does not prevent them from being happy. “I believe that we have a genuine kinship of souls, that once upon a time we were one,” admits the loving actor.

Soul mates have no concept of nationality. John Lennon believed that his symbiotic and unconventional relationship with Yoko Ono was actually the reincarnation of the passionate love of Napoleon and Josephine. He describes his feelings like this: “Before Yoko and I met, we were half human. You've probably heard the myth about people divided in two. We are two halves and only together we are a whole.”

Video materials on the topic of the article

Big webinar on the topic of finding true love:

Psychological training: how to find your soulmate:

Three main steps towards each other:

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