All little children believe in Santa Claus. And all adults know that he does not exist, but at the same time they ask children what they would like to receive as a gift from Santa Claus, supporting children's faith in the myth. Is this good? Maybe when asked by children: “Does Santa Claus exist,” we need to explain to the child once and for all that this is a myth and there are no miracles in the world?
The role of Santa Claus in a child's life
The figure of Santa Claus occupies a special place in the lives of children and adults. Behind it lies the faith of our ancestors in an ancient deity who brings gifts to New Year, and with them - hope for a new harvest and new life. Even modern man, far from archaic beliefs, feels the need to celebrate the New Year. What can we say about a child for whom Santa Claus is absolutely real?
This is a character who will definitely come on time and bring everything you want. This is a kind of “collective” parent onto whom children project their ideas about an ideal adult.
The expectation of a fairy tale, the feeling that wishes are being fulfilled, and, finally, ordinary greed (the more they give, the more you want) - all these feelings live for the time being in every child. During this period, children, pondering the question of whether Santa Claus exists, look for evidence of this fact first of all. After all, playing Santa Claus helps him realize that even not very correct feelings have a right to exist. Having satisfied his fantasies, his greed, a growing person learns to control this instinctive force.
A child’s question about the existence of Santa Claus should not take him by surprise.
There comes a moment in every child’s life when he, looking trustingly into his parents’ eyes, sadly asks: “Does Santa Claus really exist?” In this case, it is better for an adult to have a prepared answer. Here are some options that parents often use:
- Santa Claus comes only to little children;
- Santa Claus gives gifts only to those who believe in him; the rest are given by their parents;
- Santa Claus exists, but gifts are given by parents on his instructions (and everything has been agreed upon with him) - since he alone is not able to give gifts to everyone everywhere.
Children don't see any problem with this fairy tale hero often appears before us in the form of living people. They are ready to accept that these are just men dressed up in a Santa Claus costume. They know very well that the person who showed up at school with a bag of gifts lives at the end of the street and plays the role of Santa Claus, because that’s what all adults do.
Until what age can a child believe in Santa Claus?
As long as your child wants to believe in Santa Claus, support this game. It doesn’t matter how old he is: 4, 8 or 11. Step over your realism and still organize a holiday.
Playing Santa Claus is necessary for the development of a child’s imagination, symbolic perception of the world, and creative thinking.
How to give the correct answers?
If he asks very specific questions: “How does Santa Claus manage to come to all the children at once? Why does he look like dad or uncle Seryozha? What does he look like?”, offer your version, suitable for this age.
For example, explain to your child that there is only one Santa Claus, but there are many children, and therefore he has assistants who carry out all the wizard’s tasks.
When telling an older child about the existence of Santa Claus, you can mention a distant northern country, reindeer and a small ice hut littered with children's letters. Coming up with an interesting answer does not mean lying.
If you are very worried that the child may be offended by you for deceiving, you can start all stories about Santa Claus with the words: “I heard” or “there are rumors that Santa Claus”...
If you are pushed to the wall and demand an honest answer to the question whether there is real Grandfather Frost, you can say: “I wanted your life to also have the same fairy tale as I once had.”
In the end, any question from a son or daughter about belief in miracles is an opportunity for the adult himself to think: “What do I believe in myself? Does Santa Claus really exist for me? Treat your child's question as an opportunity to talk and hear each other.
The contact that arises between you and the work that happens in your soul when answering a question is a very valuable gift. It is this contact that represents the moment a person meets himself. And in this situation, the wrong answer to children's question does not exist.
Should you say yes to magic?
When you say yes incredible magic Santa Claus, you say yes to hope and faith. After all, there are few adults who would want to be told the truth about Santa Claus as a child.
Everyone wants a little fairy tale in life. Having preserved it, regardless of whether it is true that Santa Claus exists or not, we grow up, but the feeling of expecting a miracle, the premonition of something bright for the New Year continues to live in our memory.
Inventing magical stories, decorating the Christmas tree, secretly placing gifts under it, anxiously awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus with our children, it is as if we are once again plunging into those childhood emotions, experiencing that happy expectation of a fairy tale and a miracle. We need it no less than our kids, and maybe even more, because we miss without magic in our lives.
We, adults, should not forget that Santa Claus will exist as long as we want and believe it... And along with the chimes, magic will definitely happen!
The New Year is approaching - a magical time of gifts, miracles and magic. Children write letters to Santa Claus at the beginning of December, listing their most, sometimes incredible, desires. Parents often find themselves puzzled by certain positions - where, you say, can I get a real magic wand?
Pre-New Year's time is the period when adults begin to wonder whether the fairy tale about Santa Claus is harmful to children. How to tell a child the truth about the New Year's wizard, what to do when he realizes that there is no wizard, and adults have simply been deceiving all this time? Psychologists are rushing to reassure worried parents: most likely there will be no need to debunk the myth, and the child will figure everything out on his own. And this is completely normal.
At a certain age, almost all of us believed in the existence of Santa Claus or. This belief was reinforced not only by the stories of the parents, but also by the environment as a whole - how can one not believe it when the New Year’s spirit is in the air everywhere.
Despite this, on average, by the age of 8, children begin to realize that their parents put gifts under the tree, and that Santa Claus is the same fairy-tale character as, for example, Baba Yaga. The process of realizing this fact occurs gradually: children notice that some things in real life impossible - so, delivering millions of gifts in one New Year's Eve You can only use magic. Kristen Dunfield of Concordia University explains that when children ask questions about how Frost does this, this indicates normal cognitive development in the child. Debunking the myth of Santa Claus by the child himself is an excellent task, in which the child learns to compare facts and find contradictions.
Parents who do not want to participate in the destruction themselves fairy tale, answering a child’s questions about Father Frost or Santa, can direct his thoughts in one direction or another. Some answers can only strengthen a child’s faith in miracles, while others can push him to debunk the myth.
By the way, anything can become that “accurate mistrust” - some children begin to suspect something when they notice that Santa Claus is packing gifts in gift paper from the IKEA store you bought over the weekend, while others simply find one of the surprises in the closet.
In general, the results of a number of studies indicate that children quite easily accept the truth that Santa Claus does not exist. Parents who decide to talk about this have a much more difficult time. Acceptance of the truth occurs at the age when children begin to understand that the lie about Father Frost and Santa is not a deception, but simply a wonderful fairy tale.
I am a father. My name is Stas. And today I want to tell you about how to prove to a child that...
The gray-bearded old man works cleanly: he leaves no fingerprints. He only leaves gifts! And, naturally, the child has a question: does Santa Claus exist or is it all done by parents?
I provide you with some evidence that there is a wizard. Agree that faith in miracles brightens life. Try not to let the baby doubt: kind grandfather was, is and will always be!
Santa Claus exists! Proof
1. He has an address.
You all know perfectly well where Grandfather Frost lives. Are you writing a letter to your grandfather with wishes for the New Year?
But just in case, I’ll write the address: 162390, Russia, Vologda region, city of Veliky Ustyug, house of Father Frost.
Tell your child that Grandfather Frost has his own patrimony in the city of Veliky Ustyug. From there he goes on horseback and in a sleigh to congratulate children in different parts of our country.
Print photos from the Internet - the house, the post office, where he reads our letters with wishes; fragments of his travels. Show them to your baby.
2. Harmful people are re-educated without difficulty.
To revive a hero means to endow him with specific traits. Grandfather Frost is fair. Be sure to tell this to your child. Grandfather Frost comes only to those who have behaved well. And you will notice that the baby has turned into an angel. Which means he believed dad. You are on the right track! The main thing is not to go too far and not to blackmail the baby with this in order to influence him. Otherwise, the magical atmosphere will quickly dissipate.
3. Poems and songs are dedicated to him.
Poems and songs about Santa Claus are full of details: a red nose, a long white beard... Such a description can only be made if you have seen the hero.
4. He has a large staff. 
The most important assistant of Santa Claus and his right hand- this is his granddaughter Snegurochka. Grandfather also has snowmen on his staff (they keep order), gnomes (they take envelopes with wishes and pack gifts) and many others (at your discretion). Grandfather also has personal transport: a sleigh with a horse team. Right now, for example, our 3 year old daughter Dashenka really waits for Grandfather Frost every day. And the only excuse we have so far is about when Grandfather Frost will come - there is no snow and Grandfather cannot come yet, because the sleigh will not pass on asphalt.
And if you meet several Santa Clauses on the street at once, you can easily explain to your child that they are just helpers carrying out important assignments.
5. Miracles are the work of Grandfather Frost!
You are doing some general cleaning before the holiday and find a long-lost watch behind the sofa (wardrobe, nightstand, etc.). There also turned out to be a car or a train (the kid didn’t expect to find them). Your sincere joy and surprise is the best confirmation that miracles exist and they are created not by parents, but by someone else. Who is this??? Of course Grandfather Frost!
6. Who draws patterns on the window?
Of course, you know how pictures appear on windows! Tell your child that these wonderful pictures are drawn by Grandfather Frost. All he has to do is blow on the window and a picture will appear, a masterpiece! While walking, catch snowflakes with your mitten and look at them. Only a sorcerer could create such a wonder! And if there is a creation, there is also a master who created it.
7. He acts in films.
How many films and cartoons with a kind old man in the title role! All stories are different, but each confirms your words: he exists and does not cease to create miracles and goodness.
8. Guess wishes.
The boxes that materialize under the tree are amazing. Imagine the baby’s surprise when he finds there what he has long wanted and dreamed about. Who would doubt that a wizard was at home?
9. He came to visit!
Nowadays there are many agencies where you can order a New Year's grandfather. But daddy himself can handle this best. Before the holiday, learn poems, sayings, etc. (which Grandfather Frost always tells) to make it interesting and fun. Borrow a suit from friends (or buy it). Change clothes on the landing or at your neighbors' place (where your child won't catch you doing it). Be sure to pay attention to the details: take off your watch (the child may recognize you by it) and the like; work with your voice (must be bass). And go make your children happy!
Warning!
FATHER FROST
(M. Klokova)
At night there is flying snow in the field,
Silence.
In the dark sky, in a soft cloud
The moon is sleeping.
Quiet in the field. Dark, dark
Looks at the forest.
Santa Claus, a huge old man,
I got off the tree.
He is all white, all new,
All in the stars
In a white hat and downy
Boots.
All covered in silver icicles
Beard.
He has an icicle in his mouth
Made from ice.
Higher, higher
Santa Claus grows up.
Here he is out
Because of the fir trees and birches.
Here he stomped
Grabbed a pine tree
And clapped
Moon with a snow mitten.
He walked
He shook his head
He whistled
In your icy whistle.
All snowflakes
They lay down in the snowdrifts,
All snowflakes
The lights lit up.
So I told you some evidence that. Now you are fully armed. But maybe you can come up with something yourself! If this suddenly happens, share your inventions in the comments.
Happy New Year to you! And so that Santa Claus doesn’t forget about you. I hope you have been obedient this year!
Yes! I almost forgot to remind you! Have you already decided what you will give your children for the New Year? We can advise you. Come and explore
The poem was prepared thanks to http://www.zanimatika.narod.ru
See you again!
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Our experts are unanimous: at any age, you cannot deprive a child of a miracle. Faith in it, sometimes irrational, allows even adults to overcome difficult obstacles and solve problems. Tasks that seem impossible to those who do not believe in miracles.
Many experts, including Eric Berne, are convinced that the role of the inner child in the life of an adult is difficult to overestimate.
In fact, society regularly puts us in this position - when we become a young specialist in a company or get a new job. social role(for example, son-in-law or daughter-in-law).
In such situations, a childhood filled with faith in miracles helps to survive stressful moments and adapt as easily as possible.
“Up to a certain age, a child lives in a specific magical world fantasy and creativity,” says psychologist and physical therapist Dmitry Berger. - The simplest and most logical conversation about Santa Claus can be structured like this: you, as an adult, take on the role of Santa Claus and explain to the child that he is unconditionally loved and will definitely receive his share of the fairy tale and touch the miracle.
Our life is a fragile and beautiful miracle, and there is no sadder sight than adults in whom the light of a happy and bright child has gone out
At the same time, in order to please Grandfather Frost, it is advisable to be among those children who study diligently, collect toys, eat carefully, and so on.
That is, you are not deceiving the child: in fact, you are acting as Santa Claus and recommending on his behalf exactly what you need. And you yourself give gifts to the child if he fulfills your wishes.
To some extent, you are establishing a dialogue between the child and the world of magic. In the future, this will allow the child to retain the feeling of touching a miracle.
This will help you carry part of your childhood throughout your life, which is very important.
Our life is a fragile and beautiful miracle, and there is no sadder sight than adults in whom the light of a happy and bright child has gone out.”
“Why did you have doubts?”
“Young children usually believe what their parents say without any critical thought or analysis.
That is why a child under 4-5 years old will most likely not even ask this question, says children’s and family psychologist Ekaterina Kes. “If you have read books about Santa Claus to him since childhood, watched cartoons and told him that it is Father Frost who puts gifts under the tree or personally distributes them when he comes to visit, it will not even occur to your child that Father Frost may not exist.” .
But closer to 5 years, a child may have vague doubts - is it true that winter wizard is there really? A child can either figure this out on his own or hear from someone that “there is no Santa Claus.”
In such a situation, Ekaterina Kes does not advise parents to answer unambiguously the questions of a doubting child.
It is better to reflect and explore this topic with him, asking open-ended questions, for example:
- What do you think?
- It seems like you believed in him before?
- Have you now begun to doubt that he really exists?
- Why did you have doubts?
- Would you like Santa Claus to exist?
Such questions will help you better understand your child, find out where his doubts came from and what he himself thinks about this.
This form of dialogue with your child is preferable regardless of the topics you discuss. By asking questions, you do not give ready-made answers, but think with him, help him formulate his thoughts, and encourage him to think.
However, you can learn a lot about your child if you listen carefully.
“Many children and adults believe in him, and I still believe in him too.”
“It is not very correct to unequivocally convince a child that Santa Claus exists - if a child asks about it, it means he already feels that it is not true,” continues Ekaterina Kes. - And yet, just taking it and saying: “There is no Santa Claus, these are all actors in disguise who work for money” is also not an option. It means destroying the magic in one fell swoop and taking away a child’s dream.”
Children really really want to believe in fairy tales and magic.
A child psychologist advises the following phrase: “You know, I can’t say for sure whether Santa Claus exists or not. Many children and even adults believe in him, and I still believe in him too. I have never seen him myself, but I have heard a lot about him.
I believe that there is the most Chief Grandfather Frost, who lives far, far away in the North and is helped by many of his assistants. It is these helpers who come to children. You know, there are such magical things that if you believe in them, then they exist, and if you don’t believe in them, then they don’t exist.”
You do not deceive the child and do not tell obvious lies, and at the same time you leave him hope and the opportunity to believe in what he himself wants to believe.
And children really really want to believe in fairy tales and magic.
What else can you say?
Psychologist and art therapist Ekaterina Antyufyeva advises three more answer options depending on age.
“Of course, Santa Claus exists!” (3-5 years)
Belief in a fairy tale is one of the resource states of childhood. It is important for children to believe that in life there is a place for magic, celebration, unexpected surprises and wishes come true. However, not only for children, right?
Memories of the anticipation of a miracle and the atmosphere family holiday long years later they will respond in their souls with warmth and gratitude.
“Santa Claus is a miracle, and miracles happen to those who believe in them” (5-7 years)
Watch a film about Lapland with your child or visit the Russian residence of Father Frost. Write him a letter (there is such a service), your child will be glad to receive an answer in a beautiful envelope.
Tell us that Santa Claus really needs help, so he asks other people to help him organize a holiday, and they put on costumes, congratulate the children and give gifts.
This will save your child from disappointment when he notices, for example, that Santa Claus is in kindergarten speaks in the voice of a teacher.
“Each of us is a little bit of a wizard, remember?” (8-10 years)
At this age, a child can be told that Santa Claus exists, but exists as an image, like good fairy tale, as a wonderful tradition to create a holiday and give joy to others.
Sooner or later, the unconditional faith of children in Santa Claus begins to be subject to critical questions about the reality of his existence, how he manages to get to everyone, how he guesses wishes. Many parents are frightened by this moment because they don’t know what to say: tell the truth or allow them to remain in the magical world?
Does Santa Claus exist? What to say?
At 8-9 years old, a child distinguishes between the fictional world and the real one. For the interest shown in the person of Santa Claus, you can choose one of the explanations listed below.
- Santa Claus exists as long as faith in him is alive.
- Santa Claus is a citizen of a magical land, along with other fairy tale characters.
- Santa Claus lives not as a person, but in our thoughts, as a legendary hero.
Belief in miracles later helps children cope with difficult situations. Fairy tales develop Creative skills. In the child's later life, they facilitate adaptation to the adult world.
If the child is interested in why Santa Claus always looks different, tell him that the real one can’t cope with everything, since he needs to do everything in one night and has to use the services of assistants.
The opinion that maintaining a child’s belief in magic can cause harm and lead to disappointment in the future is wrong. With age, he will figure everything out on his own. And if he asks why he was told a lie, say that the main thing is the opportunity to give joy to loved ones, the desire to create miracles, and whether Santa Claus exists in real life is a secondary question.
What not to do
You should not resort to blackmail and manipulation through trust in Santa Claus, declaring that in the event bad behavior he will leave the child without a gift. To achieve the desired behavior, one must resort to skill-building methods. In its absence good behavior will be forced and not long-term.
Brothers of Santa Claus from different parts of the world
Tell your child that the whole world believes in Santa Claus, as evidenced by the number of his relatives.
If the answers to the question “does Santa Claus exist?” still leaves doubts in the child’s mind, tell him that the existing personality is known - St Nicholas, patron of travelers and children. It is known that Saint Nicholas was born in the year 270 in what is now Turkey, the date of death is December 6, 346. Legends about his kindness and noble deeds are known to this day. They say that he helped the poor, and secretly put money and food in the shoes of the children, which were placed outside the threshold.
The tradition began in the 10th century. In the Cologne Cathedral (in Germany) on December 6, the students of the parish school were presented with sweets; over time, throughout Germany they began to hang shoes for the saint in anticipation of a gift. Soon they began to do this throughout Europe. Adults can also find surprises left by St. Nicholas in the most unexpected places. Adherents of the Catholic faith in Mikolajki celebrate December 6th. Supporters of Orthodoxy celebrate St. Nicholas Day on December 19.
Video about whether Santa Claus exists
