How to find a boyfriend - we suggest 10 useful tips+ 5 places where you can definitely find it!
Who doesn't want to find happiness in their personal life?
Yes, everyone wants it!
True, not everyone succeeds.
Some girls have to do practically nothing to attract the attention of the opposite sex - there are so many options that they don’t have time to choose.
But others have to look for ways how to find a boyfriend.
It's not so scary if you don't have good relationships with guys for a while.
But if you don't learn from your mistakes, then this is a serious problem.
You can’t constantly sit within four walls and hope that one day Brad Pitt will ring the doorbell and, seeing your unearthly beauty, will immediately ask you to marry you.
The chances of this happening are negligible.
Do you want to find yourself a boyfriend?
Take action!
Do you want to find yourself a boyfriend? So start doing something!
In one of the teams in which I had the opportunity to work, there was a girl named Natasha.
Well, the girl - when she was my colleague, she was already 30.
Natalya was catastrophically unlucky in her personal life; she could not find a guy or build a serious relationship.
It’s not that there were no candidates - there were, but for one reason or another the young lady rejected them.
During one of the corporate events, when we sat with the girls in the office, an interesting conversation ensued.
I don’t remember what exactly we celebrated, and that’s not the point.
Natasha, emboldened after the wine, began to complain that I’m so unlucky in my personal life, not like you, I can’t find a normal guy for myself, but I’m trying so hard, trying so hard.
We kept a reserved silence, but the lively Alla took the floor.
She was the same age as Natalya, but she had been happily married for 6 years and was raising a 4-year-old child with her husband.
Alla reproached Natasha for not trying at all, but on the contrary, doing everything to keep the guys away from her.
I remembered Kolya, our former programmer, who wooed Nata, and handsome Yura, who spent a long time begging for her phone number during our get-togethers in a cafe, and Denis, the guy from the office next door, who had been showing signs of attention to the girl for a month to no avail.
“It’s good to tell you,” Natasha answered, “when you and your husband great love, and I don’t want to be with those I don’t love.”
“So this love,” Alla answers, “is what my husband and I built together.”
And she said that she categorically did not like her now beloved husband at the moment, but she went on a date.
After a couple of meetings I discovered him positive traits and - fell in love.
“You will sit and wait for the prince and turn your nose up at every attractive candidate, and you will remain lonely,” Alla summed up.
We unanimously agreed with this.
7 reasons why you can't find a boyfriend
Girls often like to blame fate and circumstances for the fact that they cannot build a couple with someone.
But the Universe is not always to blame for their troubles; sometimes, in order to find the true culprit, you just need to look in the mirror.
What prevents many girls from finding a boyfriend is:
- lack of self-confidence;
- flaws in appearance that are easy to correct, for example, excess weight or unkempt clothing;
- fear of ;
- excessive self-confidence and arrogance;
- laziness, which forces you to stay at home;
- rude manners that turn guys off;
- illusions that make princes wait, instead of paying attention to the handsome guy next to them.
Of course, there may be other reasons, but before you grumble at fate, think about whether you yourself are the reason that you are still single.
Look around you - it may be easier to find a boyfriend than you think.
If you try your best but still don't understand, how to find a boyfriend, it means you’re not trying hard or you’re just looking in the wrong place.
The easiest way to improve your personal life is to look around and think about which of your friends is suitable for the role of your soulmate.
It is quite possible that some handsome young man has already despaired of attracting your attention, because you, without noticing it, are rejecting him.
If there are no suitable candidates nearby, then you can find yourself a guy as follows:
- Ask your friends to introduce you to some handsome and free young man.
- Take a walk through the school, university or office corridors - and suddenly a handsome guy is hiding in them from your love.
- Search through the pages of classmates, classmates, childhood friends, in general - all those with whom the connection has been lost, but which is easy to restore.
Sometimes, in order to fall in love, you don’t need to go far away, you just need to look, if not among your friends, then among your acquaintances.
By the way, this method of finding your soulmate has one huge advantage: you can always collect information about a guy who claims to be a gentleman, and you are not afraid that some skeletons in the closet will come out.
Is it possible to improve your personal life if you really want it?
Of course you can.
It will be much easier for you to find your soulmate if you act confidently and stock up on sensible recommendations.
If you have seriously decided to find yourself a boyfriend, then here are 10 useful tips on how to achieve what you want.:
- Do not hesitate to come up first and see what you like - you should not completely rely on the stronger sex in this matter.
- Watch your appearance, remember that guys love with their eyes.
- Smile more - it attracts young people.
- Start radiating sexual energy– she attracts the stronger sex like a magnet.
- Visualize an image of the guy you want to find.
- Step out of your comfort zone more often, for example, start going to more parties, even if you hate them.
- Don’t refuse guys a date, because in order to form an opinion about a person, you need to get to know him at least a little, and not just look at him once.
- Love yourself, then men will start loving you too.
- Don't run after young people - they prefer discreet ladies.
- Don't focus on the fact that you are lonely, just enjoy life.
Look around, the guy of your dreams may be just around the corner,
as, for example, in this short cartoon:
Where you can find a guy: 5 chic places
Single girls often complain: “I can’t find a boyfriend. I just have no idea where to look for him.”
But those girls who found happiness in their personal lives did not write their gentlemen out of the ground.
They found them in the same places where you go.
They were simply more efficient, seductive and smart.
There are enough places where you can find a guy without much difficulty:
A place where you spend a lot of time.
This could be an office, educational institution, training center or something else.
By the way, scientists have proven that colleagues make the strongest couples.
This is a great place to find a guy.
Or you can register on a special website.
Sport Club.
If you go to a gym, you know how many cute guys go there to work out.
The larger the club, the higher your chances of meeting your soulmate.
Cultural institutions: cinemas, theaters, galleries, museums, exhibition centers, etc.
As a last resort, consider nightclubs to be cultural institutions and start getting acquainted there. ☺
Anywhere: in charitable foundations, at some courses, in interest clubs, etc.
Bring something else into your life besides work/study and everyday life to understand how many cute single guys live in your city.
I think you understand how to find a boyfriend, and you will no longer lack fans.
I sincerely wish you happiness in your personal life.
Useful article? Don't miss new ones!
Enter your email and receive new articles by email
- Join some club, community or section. You can play your favorite sport, take art lessons, or join a research group. Find something you enjoy and you'll have the opportunity to meet people with whom you have a lot in common and have a lot to talk about.
- Go to clubs (this can be for adults or all ages, depending on what you like) and start talking to new people. Just be careful and use common sense.
- Find a group online that you like. This could be a fan forum for a show or famous person, or maybe a multiplayer video game that you like. However, be careful not to give your personal information to anyone you don't know.
-
Get to know each other better. Once you've met someone, get to know them better before jumping into a relationship. After all, you can't judge a person just by their appearance! Try to assess before the date whether the guy meets your minimum requirements.
- He's funny? Smart? Pleasant to talk to? Decide what is important to you and whether he has those qualities during your first conversation. If he doesn’t fit any of the requirements, then you shouldn’t even start a relationship with him, even if he looks very sexy.
-
Make sure he doesn't have anyone. If he already has a girlfriend, it is better to give up on him and look further. Think about how she might feel when she finds out that she's not his only one. Therefore, do not do to others what you would not want done to you.
Find out what other people think about him. Ask around what he is. If it seems to his friends, especially girlfriends, that he really wants to have a relationship, then this good sign. Ask your mutual friends what they think of him, and try to get to know his friends and co-workers.
Building friendship
-
Do not hurry. Don't rush your new friend, but remember that if he doesn't like you for who you are, then it's not worth wasting your time trying to win his affection. Find a person who will be your friend first. Don't expect him to become your boyfriend right away - give him time to get to know you better. First, start spending time together, communicate, first from time to time, then you can try to meet more often. Give each other space. Usually, if you feel very good and have fun together, then your friendship will grow into something more. Try not to be too intrusive: you shouldn’t decide after a week of communication whether he is worthy of becoming your husband in the future.
Show him that you are not like everyone else. Just remember to be yourself better when you talk to him. It is extremely important to show that you are different from everyone else, this will help you stand out from the crowd. Don't be just another person in the crowd, don't amplify it all negative thoughts about girls. You shouldn't be another one who falls for his looks. Be personality, fun and exciting! Don't rush things, let him get to know you.
Don't close yourself off, don't position yourself as an unapproachable girl. Take some time to spend with him and let him know that you really want to communicate with him. Smile and look him in the eyes. Don't get angry or bully him. IN otherwise he will decide that you are against any relationship.
- Tell him there is an extra seat near you and he might want to join you for lunch.
- Smile and wave when you look at each other across the room or chat with friends.
- Be kind to others too. Show him that you are the kind of person that anyone can approach and talk to. Treat others kindly, praise them, don't be rude, and show in every way that you won't bite his head off if he tries to talk to you.
-
Talk to him. It is very important to interact with him frequently. Talk to him when you meet him by chance, find a reason to talk to each other more often. The more you talk, the closer you become. This is a great way to build a friendship that can grow into something more.
Be a good friend. Since you have already become friends, then be a good friend. Support him and have fun. Become someone he can trust and admire. Most guys tend to ask out girls with whom they have a lot in common. If you will be good friends, it will be easier for him to communicate with you, and he may want to communicate with you even more often.
Get to know each other better. Find out what he is like as a person. You don't have to like everything about it, but what you don't like about it shouldn't be too critical. You cannot change him, so it is very important to accept him as he is.
- Conversations about politics, religion, childhood and family, school years, as well as hopes for the future, will tell you a lot about what kind of person he is. But be careful. When touching on things like politics and religion, you can become rude. Let him know that you are interested in his personal life, but you don't want to pry into something he doesn't want you to go into.
-
See if you have anything in common. It's good if you both like the same things (so you have something to talk about), but it's also good to have some differences (so you can compete with each other and broaden your horizons). Talk to him and find out what you have in common.
Determine its status. Try to gauge whether he is open to relationships in general. Maybe he already likes someone. Maybe he recently went through a breakup and doesn't want any dating at the moment. It is necessary to respect him and his feelings. Don't be overly clingy if he's not in the mood for a relationship.
- It may be difficult for you to get this kind of information without asking him about it. Try to beat around the bush, ask leading questions. By the way, his close friends may have this information. They may even be willing to help if they like you and want to set you up.
- Be sure not to get stuck in the friend zone if you want to date him, but remember that guy friends are great friends too!
- It is important to flirt with the guys you are interested. Don't flirt with every guy because then you will develop a bad reputation. It's important to flirt with guys who interest you. But don't flirt with every guy, it will develop a bad reputation.
Make him fall in love with you
-
Emphasize its advantages. Everyone wants to be with someone who makes them better. He makes us feel good and reassures us that we can be good people, if we try to be so. Make him believe in himself, encourage him in all his endeavors.
- Remember: don't be condescending, remove unnecessary advice and help, and don't try to adjust it to yourself. Help him become better, help him change in better side, but do not turn him into an ideal partner for your beloved.
-
Help him improve. Don't criticize him if he does something bad or wrong. This will make him feel terrible. Instead, show how it should be done. You can, of course, tell him that you don't like something, but don't do it out of meanness, and don't forget to help him find a way to do it better.
- If he has bad grades and is behind in school, take the time to tutor him on topics that you are better at than he is. Don't do his work for him, but at the same time try to help him realize that he can do everything himself.
- If he is depressed and can't find a job, help him look for one. Offer to go with him to an appointment or resume interview, and talk to him about things that can help him enjoy his job more. Help him find a job that he will enjoy every day.
- It is especially important not to criticize him publicly or in front of his friends or family.
-
Become a better person yourself. Show him what you are becoming the best person, communicating with him. Once you start getting better, he will start doing the same. Do things that you enjoy and make him feel like he is part of your life. Ask him for advice on how to change those things about yourself that you don't like.
Show your independence. Show him that you are mentally and physically independent. You don't need him constantly, every minute (although he should feel like he can help you sometimes), and that you have a mind of your own. This will make you an independent, developed and interesting person in his eyes. After all, he wants a girl, not an inflatable doll without a brain.
- Don't be afraid to be completely honest about your likes and dislikes. Let him know how you feel about the issues rather than just agreeing to everything he says.
-
Encourage his independence. Don't make him feel like he has to spend all his time with you. Don't make him the person you need to spend the weekend or Friday night with. Encourage him to do things he loves: let him spend time with his friends so you can spend time with yours.
- One of the reasons many guys avoid relationships is because they think the relationship will keep them from doing the things they love. Show him that with you it's the other way around.
-
Be yourself. Otherwise, how will you know whether he loves you or a fictional image? If you pretend to be someone you are not, then you will feel uncomfortable with him. This, in turn, will affect your communication with him, and in the end it will be difficult for you to maintain any kind of relationship.
Take a step
Making communication easier in the future
- Adviсe
- Don't talk about other girls with him, guys hate it. This will bore him, and even make him angry.
- Romantic relationships happen only when a girl is honest and also caring and considerate towards her boyfriend. They want to be a reliable support for you and expect the same from you.
- Remember that all boys are different, so choose the one who has a good character and who can make you happy. These are usually good, calm guys who make the best boyfriends. Since they don't have much luck with girls, they really appreciate the one who gave them a chance.
- When you tell him that you like him, remember to be positive. He can either reciprocate your feelings or not. The best way to find out about his feelings is to look not at what he says, but at what he does. If he constantly strives to be with you, then he definitely likes you. If he ignores you, don't call him, even if he says he's crazy about you. He may like you as a person, but he has no desire to be with you.
- If you are still a student, studying at school and you have common lessons/pairs, invite him to do homework together. The more time you spend alone, the better.
- If you think you love him, but you're not comfortable with him, then you need to take a closer look at your feelings.
- When you are talking to him and he talks to you about things that you don't understand, try changing the topic to something that you both know, it will be fun and interesting.
- Don't go ahead; give him time and space to decide what he really wants. If he doesn't want to go on a date right away, don't force him. He will offer it himself when he is ready.
- Just have fun with him and be yourself!
- Don't try to make your boyfriend jealous all the time. This weakens trust and strains relationships. In almost all cases, this pushes the partner away.
Warnings
- If you realize that he is trying to make another girl jealous, then dating him is a waste of time.
- Don't let it get you down. If he is trying to change you, break up with him. He obviously doesn't value what he has.
- Don't put pressure into relationships. If he threatens or forces you to do something you don't want to do, then that's the end of your relationship. Nobody has the right to force you to do anything.
- Don't ask someone out on a date just to show off your courage; when the truth comes out, he will be in great pain.
- Do not create the impression of a tenacious and dependent person, otherwise they will very soon want to get rid of you. Make sure this doesn't happen, make a huge number of friends and change your attitude towards people.
- Never communicate with other guys who may end up sending you messages that your boyfriend doesn't like.
- Don't be upset if you don't succeed with one. There are a lot of good guys around that you could start a relationship with.
- Don't act arrogant, otherwise he won't like you. You may see other girls acting like this. But even if someone likes them, it is most likely solely because of their appearance.
- If you have something you'd like to share with him, but you're afraid he'll react badly, write a note and put it in his wallet, or something similar.
Be a good partner. Be someone who is fun to date. If you are known as someone who is good to date, you will have a much easier time finding a guy in the future. Be cheerful, active and pleasant in communication. Become a person who is pleasant to be around.
-
Meet the new guys. Before you start dating a guy, you need to get to know him. You can try starting a relationship with someone you already know, or go out and meet new people. It's easy and fun, so don't be nervous! But you should be careful with new acquaintances - what if they are hiding something or deceiving you?
- Throw a test ball: ask all your friends if they know any bachelors. You may feel a little awkward, but you won’t run into a maniac or complete scoundrel.
- Repeat like a mantra: “What do I have to lose?” This will help you gain courage.
- Practice an inviting look. Our grandmothers did this according to the “in the corner - on the nose - on the object” scheme. Another option: try to slightly tilt your head down and to the side, raise your eyes to the guy you like, look at him from under your eyelashes and smile. This is a signal that you allow him to come and talk to you.
- If you are surrounded by a crowd of girlfriends, the young man will be embarrassed to approach you. Therefore, a couple of companions is enough to keep you company in the club. When you notice someone you like, move away from the girls and look at him with the same look from the previous point. This way you will give him a chance to talk to you.
- A sly smile is also akin to a green traffic light. Practice it in front of the mirror and be ready to use it when you meet a nice guy.
- Do you like sports guys? Join the gym. Arrive early to get a seat next to someone you like and ask for their help or advice.
- Don't ignore alumni reunions. Suddenly one of your former classmates and fellow students grew up to be your soul mate and at the same time be free?
- During your lunch break, try to go to cafes more often. It may be cheaper to eat food brought from home, but you won't meet a mysterious stranger at your desk.
- Join a club with more guys than girls: be it archeology fans or an amateur sports team.
- Look on social networks for guys you liked in school or college. Write to a couple of the coolest ones that you saw them in the “People You May Know” section and decided to ask how they were doing.
- Practice on unsuspecting fellow citizens: chat with a random fellow traveler in the elevator, flirt with the waiter. This is no obligation and will simply allow you to hone your flirting skills, which will come in handy when you meet someone suitable.
- In the meantime, the results of point 1 should already appear: one of your friends has probably found a lonely one young man who wouldn't mind getting to know you. It's time to give him (or them) your phone number.
- Remember that guy from the gym? When you bump into each other again, say, “Oh, hi! How are you doing?" - as if you have known each other for a long time. This will make him take a closer look at you.
- Depending on the time of year, come to the park with a bike or skis. If you meet a nice guy, ask him where is the best place to ride. If you're lucky, he'll keep you company.
- If you decide to go to the movies or somewhere else, choose a weekday. On Sundays, people often go out to have fun with their families, and at odd times there are more chances to meet a person who is also lonely, like you, and to talk with him in a half-empty bar or cinema hall.
- How are you doing? forgotten loves from social networks? Did you answer? If so, invite them to meet for coffee. If not, write to two more.
- If you're in a crowded place, position yourself not far from a nice guy chatting with friends. When they have a conversation where you can add your two cents, say: “Hi! I’m sorry, I accidentally heard what you were talking about...” - and join the conversation.
- Throw a party, invite your friends. Ask everyone to bring someone new to your company. Make sure you look stunning. Even if you don’t meet anyone, you will expand your circle of acquaintances. Perhaps they will have a suitable buddy for you.
- Go to a completely unfamiliar place- for example, a coffee shop you’ve never been to - and try to talk to someone there. In an unfamiliar place, it is easier to step out of your comfort zone and dare to talk to strangers.
- Post a photo from the party you recently hosted and tag all your new friends in the photo. This will remind them of you, strengthen their acquaintance and give the guys a reason to invite you for a cup of coffee.
- “Accidentally” bump into a cute guy in a store. This will give both a reason to start a conversation (you will have to apologize), and tactile contact that will immediately make you closer friend to friend.
- If you have pets, be sure to use this! People often meet at a dog park, in line for vaccinations at a veterinary clinic, or on thematic forums.
- Go to a local rock band's concert. Music is liberating, and the topic of conversation is ready: you can discuss the concert and each other’s musical tastes.
- Go to the store men's clothing in the style you like. If you see a nice buyer, contact him. Say that you are looking for a gift for your brother, ask if it is a nice shirt (tie, T-shirt, belt) or so-so.
- You have already mastered the skill of meeting people and talking. Today, make it a goal to give your guy your phone number.
- Bet yourself that you can give a nice stranger your business card. and ask him to call you.
- Finally decide to chat with that guy you've been eyeing for a long time: for example, with a salesperson from a store you visit regularly. Exchange contacts.
- You've been so brave these four weeks. Congratulations! All that remains is to choose the lucky guy with whom you will go on a date.
Organizing your personal life is not as simple as it might seem at first glance. Despite the fact that there are a lot of lonely girls and young men in the world, to meet true love quite problematic. However, there are several secrets on how to find a boyfriend and forget about independence and forty cats.
How to find a good guy
Due to the fact that each girl is an individual, she may have special preferences in choosing a partner. During the search process, they should be taken into account, because not only appearance plays a role, but also character, as well as a person’s interests. There are several of the most successful places where an acquaintance can quickly begin and develop into something more. Among them are the following:
The best places where you can meet a worthy young man
- Night club. A welcoming atmosphere, unbridled fun, a positive mood - all this can be a wonderful reason to meet someone. And it is not at all necessary to think that people meet in clubs only for frivolous connections. It all depends on what goals are pursued initially.
- Library. Girls who want to find out how to find a young man with an impressive amount of intelligence can safely go searching in the library. It is best to choose the library of a particular university in order to immediately weed out the unnecessary age category. And then the only thing left to do is come up and introduce yourself, citing the fact that there is no more room in the room, or that you need exactly the same book.
- Cafe. Experienced girls know that best time for meeting men, this is the period of a business lunch in a cafe or restaurant. If you want to know how to find a normal guy with good financial prospects, you should often visit the same cafe. Soon the guy himself will come to meet you, of which there is no doubt.
No less popular and interesting to explore are places such as:
- exhibition centers;
- art galleries;
- parks;
- supermarkets;
- public transport;
- interest clubs.
There is a stereotype that you need to sit and wait for the prince. In fact, men like it if a girl takes the initiative, but not overly intrusive. Many girls think about how to find a guy at 21 and these tips will help with this:
1. To have a pleasant time, you can make acquaintances in a nightclub or on vacation, where the situation suggests such a development of events. Dating while drunk happens easily and naturally, and you shouldn’t expect anything more.
2. You can meet at work. If a guy’s place is vacant, you should take a closer look at the men in the team, perhaps you will be able to discern a suitable candidate. You can carefully examine a person and learn more about him before taking steps towards getting closer. And you can meet, for example, at a corporate party, in an informal and fun atmosphere.
3. In educational institutions, the scheme is the same as described above, but you don’t have to wait for joint parties. You can meet directly in class or during breaks, in the cafeteria, or on the way to study.
4. Often available girls and the guys have acquaintances and friends who are eager to introduce them to each other. This opportunity should not be neglected. This does not oblige you to anything, just chatting and spending time will not harm anyone. Perhaps this is exactly the option you need.
5. Instead of feeling sorry for myself that I can’t find a guy, I’m already 21 years old, I need to make efforts and look for opportunities. It’s just an illusion that young people are fixated on their gadgets; online dating is becoming increasingly popular. For this purpose, there are dating sites where you can immediately indicate for what purposes registration is being carried out. And then, in a calm atmosphere, communicate and correspond. To be safe, it is better to immediately offer to communicate on other social networks.
6. If dating sites bother you or you simply don’t want to, you can use other opportunities on the World Wide Web. Chat on forums where you can discuss common interests, and perhaps find loved one which will take free place near.
In any case, it is important to remember one thing: if a girl wants to know how to find a successful guy with whom she can connect her future, she should not be afraid to take the first step towards her destiny, and be the first to get acquainted if the young man is really attractive.
How do you know if a guy is really good?
If a girl is worried about how to find nice guy, it must take into account several factors. First of all true face the young man will appear at the 2-3 meeting. To speed up the process of getting to know each other, and to make sure that the guy is really worth it, you should boldly ask all the questions you are interested in and get answers to them. If a guy is frank, you can already recognize his soul on the first or second date, and after that the question is: how to find perfect guy, will disappear by itself.
To cast aside all doubts and see what a guy really is, you need to pay attention to:
- his clothes;
- interests;
- hobby;
- life style;
- family and family ties generally;
- past relationships.
So, every girl should know how to quickly find a guy, and in order not to waste precious time, she should go to the most popular places for dating, choose a handsome young man, ask him all the questions you are interested in, and then be sure that quickly meeting a guy is simple and every lady can do it.
Every girl who really wants to arrange her personal life can get answers to questions about where you can find a guy in a short time, how to get to know him better, what to talk about and what to do. But you always need to remember that, regardless of where you can meet a young man, you need to think about how much he matches the girl’s preferences and whether he reaches the bar that she has set for herself. You can get rid of loneliness and love with all your heart, you just have to set a goal, but at the same time do not betray yourself.
Friends, this is not an article of an applied nature. There are no specifics here and step by step instructions how to find happiness. The article is the author’s reflections without any claim to originality or genius. Low expectations are the key to restful sleep. :)
Introduction
My friends are divided into two camps: while some are willing to share their experience and give wise advice about how to get married, others sigh that there are no normal men left in this world.
You know, if I personally didn’t know these thoroughly beautiful girls from a group of disappointed people, I could safely assume that they overpriced themselves or did not leave a chance for normal guys. But it seems that the matter is different.
Maybe some girls just tend to notice the wrong men? We fall in love with the wrong people, and then we ourselves suffer and cry at night. Yes, of course, there are not the simplest situations in life. But, to be honest, it doesn’t happen that one person is to blame.
Where to find a normal guy
Well, okay, “one day you took it and grew up. I understood and accepted that you like pompous assholes. But you get tired of this too. Any drama, even the most florid one, sometimes gets boring, and you want something normal and real. And here a reasonable question arises: where and how to find a normal guy?
If there was some magical place, some kind of place where all normal men would be hidden, then, probably, the girls would already be lining up worse than for clothes from the new H&M collection with some famous designer. Girls who graduated from the courses of the guru of women's practices Pavel Rakov would definitely be brought there on special buses, and all the broken hearts would be sent for forced rehabilitation.
Alas, there is no such place of concentrated male power. Well, or I don’t know about him. It is clear that all key life encounters always occur completely randomly and unpredictably. But here is a simple applied question: is it possible to increase this probability artificially?
Girlish thoughts out loud
I went to the people (on Telegram) and wrote to my friends asking them to tell me where they generally met and looked for non-random connections. The girls’ reaction was funny: from “Well, we communicated normally, An, why are you starting” to “Very difficult question. I’ve never met anyone who’s normal.” A friend summed it up, writing: “Oh, Anh, normal guys are an endangered species.”
Among the popular answers to the question of where to meet, if you are very lucky, were university, work, interest clubs, car services, sport sections, friendly parties, bars and cafes. One friend suggested that Romeo could safely stand guard at some fashionable intellectual parties, although the girl herself admitted that she “doesn’t work yet.”
Places vs lifehacks
So what can help you meet a normal dude?
1. Dream of meeting HIM. Be disappointed and don't expect anything
It is very important to live with the thought that somewhere in this huge world there is definitely HE, with whom you feel fun, comfortable, free and cool, as with friends. At the same time, there is no idealization of the world here. We all always fall in love with the wrong people, and many girls are more afraid of falling in love than guys. In life, everything probably comes when you let go. You will be disappointed in everything and stupidly score, not expecting anything.
Usually they shoot just the most amazing stories when I’m not even sure that he will call back after the date.
In general, you just need to believe that one day you will meet someone with whom you can be yourself. The one who loves your friends. The one with whom you can breathe easily. And if you’ve already met him, he won’t let you leave (read: don’t let him go for anything). At the same time, special emphasis is placed on the fact that it is advisable to be disappointed in everything and not wait before the cherished meeting. Just live, and then, you see, the prince is on the horizon.
2. Visualize
giphy.com If you don’t know where are you going, you might end up somewhere else.
The main idea: in order to find something, we need to clearly know what we are actually looking for. They say that visualization is something that really works.
So, girls, you need to really tune in to the right zen and imagine the one you want to be with, what you ultimately want from him. You imagine all the important qualities of the betrothed, but, most importantly, not from the opposite, that is, without any “not” particles. For example, if you want a tall brunette, ask for a tall brunette, and not “not a blonde of average height, the main thing is that he is not very short.” Only real qualities, without negativity and denial. And then you write all this on a piece of paper and send a message to the Universe, which will definitely not let you down. Yes, it may take her some time to find the guy of her dreams. But Moscow, you know, was not built right away.
The most important thing: don’t get confused in the readings, girls! We ask for the same thing, we say it out loud, otherwise the Universe will get confused.
Another life hack: sometimes it’s useful to ask friends to introduce you to someone, well, to test the charm. The main thing is not to be friends: it doesn’t work. Just guy friends.
3. Don't be afraid to take the first step
It's funny that there are two diametrically opposed opinions on this matter. One friend (married and raising a son) has long been urging everyone and me to forget about social conventions and says that, in fact, in her life situation She took the first step, and she doesn’t regret anything. Another friend (not married, no boyfriend) recently came to the conclusion that all her first steps did not lead to anything good.
I do not have a personal significant record of first steps to judge their success. But, I admit, I myself was always afraid to take the first step. It seemed that if the guy doesn’t do it himself, then he probably doesn’t need it. Why should I offer something that he potentially doesn’t need? My mother always told me: “Never ask for anything, everyone will come and give it themselves.” So: they won’t give it.
Girls, maybe you, like me, live with the philosophy of a proud heron, and normal guys don’t even realize that we might like them?
4. Sign up for Tinder already
Don’t forget that many guys are also tormented by the question: where to find a normal girl? And, as my statistics of guy friends show, many of the quite normal dudes register for general fun. What if you are the one with whom you not only have fun, but also happily ever after?
And so you dreamed, visualized, realized that the first step is not scary. Come on, act! Forward to the barricades!
And yes, I wouldn’t believe it myself if the number of “met on Tinder - happy together for 2, 3, years” stories among my own acquaintances had not grown exponentially. Important: Tinder is an example of an easy way to get dates. It doesn't matter where you find them, what matters is that you go to them at all.
A reasonable question: can something normal come out of dating on the Internet? I’ll answer with the words of my friend Christina’s American uncle, who recently wrote on my Facebook wall and instantly became a favorite of my friends:
