• What to talk about on a first date with a man: the best topics. What to talk about on a first date

    26.07.2019

    It just so happens that in most cases the initiator of the first date is a representative of the stronger sex, so the right to choose the meeting place belongs to him. If a man wants to give the initiative to a woman, then often she will still place this task on his shoulders.

    In principle, the place can be absolutely any. But there are several important factors that determine the success of this event:

    • Silence is the key to a successful conversation. You should pay attention to ensure that no one interferes with communication. Loud music around and availability nearby noisy companies They won’t give you any looseness or a certain comfort on your first date.
    • Unique places are the first step to conquering woman's heart . If the place where you decide to meet and be together for the first time is unusual, this will be an additional plus in favor of the guy. After all, girls love it when they are surprised.
    • Familiar surroundings will give you confidence. It is advisable that the inviter is already at the appointed place before the meeting. This will give you confidence, reduce the risk of being in an embarrassing situation, and communication on the first date will become relaxed and exciting.
    If a girl nevertheless takes the reins into her own hands, then most often it can be an expensive restaurant, an art exhibition, a walk in the park or any other crowded place, or a club. It’s better to find out about the establishment’s prices in advance so as not to end up in awkward situation In the evening.

    The emotions and experiences of young or not so young people at the first meeting are directly related to each other, so the choice of place in some way determines the desire to meet this person again. The unusualness of a room or a corner in nature will add piquancy and leave a pleasant mark in the memory, and perhaps for life.

    Topics to talk about on a first date

    For a first date, the main thing is not only to give your appearance an attractive image (make beautiful hairstyle, skillfully apply makeup and choose an outfit), but also be able to communicate, think through correctly interesting topics for conversation. Awkward silence can only aggravate the situation if both partners are shy and modest. There are several topics of conversation that people of different backgrounds can support and continue.

    Friends and parents


    Perhaps one of the safest and most harmless topics for communication on the first date for both a guy and a girl. There is no need to come up with unnecessary words or beat around the bush to find out about your partner’s attitude towards the people around him. Thanks to this topic, you can understand the range of interests of the interlocutor at the initial stage of communication.

    Everyone knows folk wisdom from the lips of the ancient Greek poet Euripides “Tell me who your friend is, and I will tell you who you are.” Friends and people close to him speak about a person’s character, his moral principles, and principles.

    At the beginning of a relationship, you should not be too openly interested in your parents, their interests, activities and means of earning money. This can leave a negative impression on the person who is not yet ready to discuss the topic or has not personally initiated the conversation about them.

    Work and study


    In young people who are trying to find out closer friend friend on a first date, study or work are one of the main priorities at this stage of life's journey. The conversation will turn to them in any case. Especially if the conversation has exhausted itself and has reached a bit of a dead end, you can always ask a question about the educational institution, the place of work of the interlocutor, or plans for the future. This good way keep the conversation going.

    If you have common interests, you may not notice how a calm conversation can turn into a heated and fascinating discussion. The main thing is not to go too far with your arguments and not to put pressure on your interlocutor.

    Hobbies and preferences


    It is very important to find out about your partner's hobbies outside of work or school. Its absence can tell a lot about a person. The topic is worth touching on when communicating on the first date, because from this you can draw some conclusions and decide whether to continue dating this person or end everything at the initial stage.

    The safest and most unobtrusive topics for the first conversation are about favorite musical styles, culinary tastes and preferences. Perhaps, by tactfully asking about preferences without focusing on this, you can arrange a self-cooked meal on your next date. romantic dinner by candlelight to your partner’s favorite music. This will undoubtedly impress him.

    Jokes and anecdotes


    Light and casual conversation on the above topics can sometimes be moderately diluted with jokes and anecdotes. This will allow you to overcome the barrier of constraint, which is very important when communicating on a first date, and at the same time test your partner’s sense of humor. After all, it’s nice to listen to the sincere laughter of a person you like, for whose sake you decided to take such a reverent step.

    Improvisation and switching to another topic through communication in a humorous manner will help get out of a tense situation when the conversation has reached a dead end or has become a little constrained due to the diverse interests of overly temperamental interlocutors. However, you need to understand the line when humor becomes annoying.

    What to say to a girl and a guy on the first date


    It's finally done! He noticed you among many, appreciated you and invited you on a date. These joyful experiences cannot be confused with anything. Fancy Hairstyle, makeup, outfit (dress or jeans) - all these important and necessary things were done at the first meeting. But not only that. Behavior, gestures, tactile sensations put the picture together into a single whole.

    The visual effect passes, the aroma of perfume becomes familiar, and communication takes over. Let's try to figure out what to talk about on the first date with a man.

    There are several steps that will help you overcome unwanted modesty and excessive embarrassment when communicating. Here are the most important of them:

    Guys love to help, so you can ask for advice or ask for an opinion on a particular problem. For example, with a computer. Talking about pets will help smooth out any confusion in communication. Pets can be another reason for new meetings.

    If a man does not take the initiative into his own hands and does not maintain communication, then perhaps he simply did not like the girl’s company. In this case, you shouldn’t be upset, just end the evening early and say goodbye.

    How to conduct a dialogue on a first date between a guy and a girl


    Guys, by nature, have more pronounced leadership traits than girls, so they are less shy and will quickly find a topic for conversation. But excitement and fear at a meeting can lead to confusion. It’s worth thinking in advance what to say to a girl on the first date.

    Girls love confident guys. But not everyone can boast of this on the first date. Therefore, you need to relax and calm down before him. Don’t dress too brightly and pompously, flooding yourself from head to toe eau de toilette. It is enough to be washed, neat and cleanly dressed and smell slightly of perfume. It is advisable to buy flowers, but not necessary. You can replace them with a small figurine, soft toy. It is also worth considering that with a huge bouquet the person who gave it will have to go around all evening.

    Further joint meetings depend on how the first date goes. The most important thing is to interest the girl, be attentive and polite, be able to listen to her and not stoop to vulgarity and rudeness.

    Here are some tips on what to talk about on a first date with a girl:

    • It's very easy to start a conversation. You can start by asking the girl about life, friends, study or work, and hobbies. The main thing is to ask questions first, so as not to create a situation of “awkward silence.” Under no circumstances should you turn all this into a form of interrogation, otherwise you might mistake the guy for a thief or a maniac.
    • Unobtrusively find out about her preferences and tastes. When communicating, it is advisable not to argue, expressing an opposing point of view, but, on the contrary, to show the compatibility of interests and preferences. This brings people closer together and makes it possible to continue communication more actively. It would be good if we really found common ground and had the opportunity to talk about it for hours.
    • If suddenly the pause is too long, you can check her sense of humor. Tell an interesting and funny story from your life or fill them with jokes. It’s good if you don’t wait for such pauses, but alternate them with conversations on general topics.
    • When communicating with a girl, you don’t need to make yourself a “superhero”, attributing non-existent feats. Basically they don't like it. One must be sincere, frank and avoid deception. If you suddenly come across someone who quickly sees through this, it will be very unpleasant. Modest and true stories- ideal topics for conversation on a first date.

    Prohibited topics on a first date


    There are unwanted topics and moments that are inappropriate and unnecessary on a first date. Here are the main ones:
    1. Religion and politics. Such topics should be avoided on the first date, because they are quite subjective. The points of view of the interlocutors may turn out to be completely opposite, which will ultimately lead to heated discussion and argument. It can also bring to an end a relationship that never began.
    2. Former partners. This is what you can’t talk about on a first date under any pretext. The topic will be unpleasant for both. You can overdo it and reveal your shortcomings ahead of time by telling why your past relationship broke up. Comparison with a new person’s ex is even more inappropriate.
    3. Health problems. A story about a broken arm in childhood under funny circumstances can amuse, but a story about chronic flatulence, for example, will only scare you away.
    4. Stories about people who are unknown to the interlocutor. The topic is tiring and can leave a negative impression, because it also reveals the shortcomings expressed in relation to various categories of acquaintances.
    5. Auto, sports and technology. Basically, only guys are interested in these things; most girls are far from such topics and special terms (although there are exceptions - then it’s possible). And so stories about entertaining football matches, knowledge of tournament tables or specifications motorcycles will not make the right impression on a girl.
    6. Intimate relationships. The first date should not be overshadowed by the topic of intimacy and sex, otherwise you may mistake your partner for a pervert or one of those who “only need this from a girl.” Such a conversation on the first date is inappropriate and can lead to a dead end in future relationships. There are situations when the partner is not against this, as follows from the hints and the chosen topic. If everything happens according to mutual consent, then there shouldn’t be any problems afterwards.
    7. Comments on the appearance of the interlocutor. Even appearance your partner is not satisfied with something, in no case should you talk about it at the first meeting. Of course, if you want to repeat it again.
    What to talk about on a first date - watch the video:


    The first date will tell partners a lot. To avoid bitter disappointment that you “said the wrong thing,” it’s worth thinking through the topics and remembering the stories that can be told. But overall, it’s important to just be yourself!

    So, it's done! Time for subtle hints light flirting ended. He asked you out on a date. How to behave on the first date so that a second date follows? Many girls, before their first date, spend half a day in a beauty salon, painting their nails, doing their hair, massages, and masks. Behind this fuss, the main thing is lost, your personality.

    How to make your first date go well?

    To begin, exhale deeply and calm down. The man is worried just like you. Get ready for a date, but without fanaticism.

    Clothing should be appropriate for the occasion, hair styled, makeup natural. You shouldn’t rush headlong to buy a new dress and get a super manicure; a man most likely won’t notice anything. And your bad mood and fussiness are a must.

    Remember that you are you. You have many advantages, a wonderful character, you cook deliciously and can make anyone happy. worthy man. It’s not up to you to woo men, let them woo you!

    The most important thing, of course, is communication. What should you tell a man on a first date? Tell us about yourself, what you like, what you like to do in free time, try to find common ground. Listen to the man. Let it open up next to you.

    What topics should you avoid on a first date?

    • Don't talk about problems. The first date is not the time when you can go crazy young man a bunch of them family problems. There is no need to talk about your cat’s illness, your son’s failing grades, or the machinations of your work colleagues. Men don't like to work with a vest. Leave these conversations for your girlfriends.
    • Don't make plans right away life together. Before you really get to know each other, you are already telling him what will happen when you get married. These conversations will be appropriate later, when you already get to know each other and understand that your partner is just as committed to family and marriage as you are. But on the first date, a man will perceive your dreams of a wedding, a house and two children as an attempt to encroach on his freedom. It is unlikely that you will have a second date later, so take your time.
    • Don't talk about your exes. You shouldn’t talk in detail about how many men you’ve had, how many you’ve met, why you broke up. A man will think that you have not forgotten your exes and constantly compare him with them.

    What to talk about with a man on the first date?

    • Talk about himself. People love to talk about themselves. Ask what he does and how he likes to spend his free time. Be prepared to listen to his stories about hunting, diving or conquering peaks. Ask a question about his achievements; any man will be happy to talk about his successes, especially when he sees your admiring face.
    • Avoid templates. Often dates turn into interviews because people cannot relax, they talk about the weather, their studies, work, position. Try to find out what a man likes, how he spends his free time, how often he sees his family and friends. This way you can understand how you will spend your free time if you become a couple, where to go and who to meet.
    • Ask interesting questions. To prevent the conversation from reaching a dead end, come up with interesting questions for your counterpart.
      For example, a question like this: “What would you do if you had a million dollars?”
      You will immediately recognize a man’s favorite pastime, even if it remains a mystery to him.
      “Where would you live if you could move anywhere?”
      Perhaps the young man would like to live in a large metropolis or in the suburbs; in any case, this topic can be developed further, talk about your preferences and come to something that will unite you. These questions will help you better understand your interlocutor and find common ground.


    Conclusion: the most important thing is to behave naturally on a date! Don’t get lost, try to get to know your interlocutor, show yourself the best side, and the second date will not keep you waiting.

    Prepare for your first date according to all the rules! You definitely need to think about what you will say to the guy. We offer enough interesting topics and a list of specific questions that will help you get to know the person and tell about yourself. You will also find taboo topics that should absolutely not be raised. They can ruin their opinion of you. Choose the options that suit you and increase your chances of getting a second date!

    Choose universal, positive phrases to make talking easy and comfortable:

    • Hello, how great it is that we met on such a sunny (rainy) day!
    • Thank you for inviting me to the cinema! I love comedies (horror, crime).
    • I hope our meeting will be as interesting as our acquaintance.
    • Finally we have met and can get to know each other better.
    • I hope you have a good time with me.

    Do not rush to bombard the guy with questions, first of all, greet him and wait until he is the first to become interested in you.

    The best topics to talk about on a date

    Here is a list of suitable conversation topics:

    • Movie. Almost everyone watches films. Discuss new releases, sensational and classic films from the past.
    • Sports and hobbies. Unobtrusively find out what the young man is interested in (fishing, hunting, cooking, theater, billiards or wood burning). You can compliment him that he has many interesting hobbies.
    • Job. Ask about his occupation, what field the man works in, but not about his position and income level. You can ask questions about his attitude towards the fact that the girl is doing business.
    • Family. Find out about his brothers or sisters, parents. Enter into a dialogue by talking about your family. Perhaps you are both the eldest children in the family, or have brothers.
    • Animals. How he treats animals, whether he has a pet, who it is, breed, age.

    Try to talk about nothing (the weather, food in a restaurant, if the date is in it, tell funny stories from life). This will help you get closer and avoid discomfort.

    Do you want to know all the secrets of seducing men? We recommend watching free video course Alexey Chernozem "12 laws of seduction for women." You'll get step by step plan 12 steps on how to drive any man crazy and keep his affection for many years.

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    Concrete questions

    When trying to ask specific questions, find out what interests you specifically.

    • Where did you go on vacation last summer?
    • How did you spend this weekend?
    • What book are you reading now?
    • What cuisine do you prefer?
    • Do you like to travel?
    • Why this course (direction, profession)?
    • Favorite place in our city?
    • Do you like winter, winter holidays, skiing?
    • What kind of pets do you have?
    • Do you go to concerts or nightclubs? What kind of music do you listen to?
    • How do you feel about walking?
    • Have you ever forgotten things (wallet)?
    • What flowers do you give your mom for her birthday?
    • The brightest New Year from childhood?
    • Do you watch cartoons? Which animated character do you like?
    • Favorite color?
    • Do you prefer to call or write an email (SMS)?
    • Have you ever performed in front of a large audience? What does it feel like?
    • Why did I attract you?

    What you can't talk about with a man

    Taboo topics that should not be discussed when communicating with a guy:

    • Neither on the first nor on subsequent dates should you talk about health or financial problems.
    • Under no circumstances should you ask or talk about past relationships. Even if he is very interested, such additional burden makes it difficult to develop a new relationship.
    • Do not interrupt or criticize him, stick to a neutral-positive line in your statements.
    • Don't turn your date into a one-man show. Dialogue is the only thing correct option conversations.
    • The topic of loneliness should also not be discussed on the first date, especially with a subsequent comment in the style of “It’s good that you invited me on a date, otherwise I haven’t dated anyone for six months and I’m starting to feel sad from loneliness.” Don't be surprised if you don't get invited to a second date.

    If anything, there is an article on the site about. She will help you prepare properly, tell you how to captivate your interlocutor, and what mistakes should be avoided.

    Don’t know where to go for your first meeting, what to wear, or how to overcome fear? Take advantage of our tips on how to...

    To avoid missing your chance, find out why in advance. Here we answered the questions: how long to wait for a call, what can prevent a guy from making one, what is the best thing for a girl to do in this case.

    No matter what smart things you say, you need a separate article on the site to help you decide on an outfit. It gives advice on choosing clothing depending on the weather and the location where the meeting will take place.

    If after the first walk the guy will disappear and shows no desire to meet again, feel free to invite him on a second date. , we understood other material. Suitable phrases and methods are collected here.

    A famous video blogger offers his topics for conversation in this video:

    If you are confident in your charisma and sociability, it is better not to use templates at all and improvise.

    The first date is an important and crucial moment for all of us, but it doesn’t happen like that. So that everything goes smoothly absolutely always. There are situations in which it is difficult to remain calm.

    The lack of topics for conversation is not a problem, because people are not talking about any topic, but simply talking. When the discussion ends, it may turn out that you need to somehow continue the conversation, but it becomes a little awkward because of the desire to please the person. You don't need to go to Google to find a list of the most trending topics. A conversation begins with a phrase, with the words of a person. It shouldn't be fake. Being yourself is one of the main tips from psychologists for those who want to have a successful first date.

    How to avoid running out of topics to talk about

    The best way to solve a problem is, as always, not to let it happen. On a date, you need to be relaxed, so you can talk about anything: about holey socks, about politics, about sex, about food, about work, about problems, about religion. You can touch on anything because you just want to. Most best advice from psychologists - say whatever you want, but so that consistency is maintained. There is no need to take the initiative by artificially changing the topic. If the thought and topic of conversation stops at work, do not immediately jump to another topic that is convenient for you or just to seem like an interesting interlocutor.

    It happens that people are taciturn on their own. There are already two options for the development of events - leave everything as it is, or adapt to the person. You should only talk about abstract topics, because the person is most likely shy or complex. Don’t point this out to him by asking “why are you silent?” In general, this is the main psychological advice for all people - do not ask a person why he is silent. This is terribly infuriating.

    Tip one: Don’t get hung up and focus on the problem. This is very important, because if a person really has some kind of problem, then you will simply confirm his or her fears. They might just run away from you.

    Tip two: if you both fell silent, then you can continue the natural train of thoughts by simply explaining your emotions regarding the date, the place where you are. Don't talk about the person, say exactly what you're thinking about this evening or day. Something like: “It’s so great that I found the time to meet you. I really like that I can finally afford to sit here with you like this.”

    Tip three: What's your favorite movie? Ask this question if you feel that the situation is getting complicated, that silence will soon follow. Don't wait until it's clear that you asked this to keep the conversation going. The fact is that not everyone reads books, but everyone loves movies without exception. You can say something like: “Listen, do you go to the movies? Don’t you know what’s worth watching right now?” Create the illusion of special interest so that it doesn't look like you're jumping on topic to avoid problems. Say that you don’t know what to watch because you’ve watched everything. This only works with movies, keep that in mind. Asking “oh, what’s North Korea’s deal with the United States?” no need. Cinema is the best time killer.

    Tip five: learn to listen and support the topic that interests your interlocutor. If you maintain a topic of conversation that is interesting to your interlocutor, then he will never stop talking, the problem will not even appear. You won't even think twice about what you need to do. Ask as many questions as possible on the topic that you think is interesting to your companion. This is very, very effective method Don't let the date come to a standstill. This will be especially useful for men, since ladies love it when they listen to them.

    If these tips did not help you, then most likely you are doing something wrong or the wrong person is sitting in front of you who is not suitable for you. Be yourself, be honest with yourself and don't try to play someone else. Don’t listen to stupid advice about what exactly needs to be said, like: “Let’s think together about what topic we should choose.” God, how boring this sounds. Put yourself in the shoes of the girl or guy you are sitting with. Imagine him or her telling you this. That's right, you are the most boring person in the world. It is better to remain silent than to carry some kind of nonsense - this is the best advice in this case.

    It seems that over a glass of wine during a date you can learn enough about a guy to form some kind of opinion: he will be happy to tell you what he does in his free time, what his relationship is with his mother, and you can even hear a couple of funny incidents from his student days. Everything would be fine if it could really help us get to know a person well enough to make an attempt to build without hesitation. romantic relationship. You can be a wonderful person, save fur seals and fight for the urban ecology, but never meet a person who is ready to share with you all the joys and misfortunes. This means that he is not responsible for choosing a partner. full list our merits, but completely ordinary compatibility, so that people feel comfortable waking up with each other?

    Apparently, Harvard University specialists care so much about people and relationships that they decided to shed light on the issue of compatibility and, using a simple mathematical algorithm, derived a formula of four questions that, according to them, determine the compatibility of two people.

    1. “Do you like horror movies?”
    2. “Have you ever traveled alone?”
    3. “Wouldn’t it be great to leave everything and live on a ship?”
    4. “What ingredient would you add to pizza?”

    If partners give the same answers to these questions, then scientists give the green light to this relationship. Of course, throwing away fans just because he would add a double portion of cheese to your pizza and you are allergic to it is not worth it. But how nice it will be if you answer the questions the same way, right?

    Harvard scientists are certainly not pioneers in matters of relationships and love. Long before them, 20 years ago, psychologist Arthur Aron from the New York Psychology Center, explored such strong feelings as love and passion. The scientist conducted an experiment: he asked a previously unknown man and woman to answer 36 questions together. After that, they had to silently look into each other's eyes for four minutes. After just six months, the participants in the experiment were ready to get married. Is it possible? Mandy Len Catron, author of The New York Times, decided to test this statement on herself and her friend, which she openly discussed in her column. According to Mandy, this technique really has the right to life.

    Catch Arthur Aron's questions to conduct your own personal experiment and check for yourself handsome man scientific theory. If everything works out, then in six months the number of newlyweds should increase sharply. Well, even if not, then this is a completely good idea for an evening together: it is quite possible that you will have a chance to get to know each other a little better and fall in love even more!

    1. Given everyone in the world, who would you invite over for dinner?
    2. Would you like to be famous? In what field?
    3. Before you make a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
    4. What is your idea of ​​a perfect day?
    5. When was the last time you sang to yourself? And for someone else?
    6. If you could live to 90 and retain either the mind or body of a thirty-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
    7. Do you have a secret premonition about how you will die?
    8. Name three things you and your partner have in common.
    9. What in your life do you feel most grateful for?
    10. If you could change anything about your parenting, what would it be?
    11. In 4 minutes, tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
    12. If you could wake up tomorrow with a quality or ability, which one would it be?
    13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about you, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?
    14. Is there something you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why didn't you do this?
    15. What is the greatest achievement of your life?
    16. What do you value most in friends?
    17. What is your most cherished memory?
    18. Worst memory?
    19. If you knew that within one year you would suddenly die, would you change anything in your current life? Why?
    20. What does friendship mean to you?
    21. What role do love and affection play in your life?
    22. Take turns naming positive characteristics of your partner. A total of five points.
    23. How close are your family members? Do you think your childhood was happier than most other people's?
    24. What do you think about your relationship with your mother?
    25. Make up three true sentences starting with “we”. For example, “Both of us in this room feel...”.
    26. Continue this phrase: “I would like to share with someone...”.
    27. If you were going to be a close friend to your partner, please tell him what you want him to know about you.
    28. Tell your partner what you like about him; be completely honest, say things that you wouldn’t say to someone you don’t know well.
    29. Share an unpleasant moment in your life with your partner.
    30. When and why did you last cry?
    31. Tell your partner what you already like about him.
    32. What is too serious, what is it inappropriate to joke about?
    33. If you were to die this evening without being able to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not saying to someone? Why haven't you told them this yet?
    34. Your house and all your belongings caught fire. After rescuing loved ones and pets, you have time to run into the house again and save one thing. What could it be? Why?
    35. Which family member's death would affect you the most? Why?
    36. Share a personal problem and consult with your partner about how he or she would handle it. Then ask your partner to share what they think about your choice of problem.
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