Over the course of two weeks, site readers took an active part in the survey: “What qualities do you value most in men?” Our expert, psychologist Anetta Orlova, commented on the results of this survey.
Loyalty and reliability (29%)
Looking at the colorful illustrations in a children’s book to the “accompaniment” of grandmother’s affectionate voice, we remembered that a happy ending Every story has one: “And they lived happily ever after.” Growing up, we, like the heroes of fairy tales, overcame obstacles, learned from our mistakes, met each other, became friends and parted ways, but always remembered that completely non-fairytale goal. Of course, you can only live happily ever after with a man who has the same values and views. For this reason, women look for qualities such as reliability, fidelity, devotion and responsibility in representatives of the stronger sex. List necessary conditions can grow indefinitely, but in most cases these qualities will indeed be the basis. Judge for yourself, why do you need someone who is wealthy, but unreliable and unfaithful? At one point, you may be left both without a man and without his bank account.
Mind (20%)
“Knowledge is a tool, not a goal,” noted L. N. Tolstoy. But how many victories can be won and how many goals can be achieved, armed with it! Women clearly understand that intelligence promises a good future and is in many ways the guarantee that a man will be wealthy. However, it should be remembered that knowledge helps in career advancement only in combination with such qualities as assertiveness, acumen, determination, and self-confidence. For comparison, calcium cannot be absorbed in the human body without vitamins C and D, without magnesium and unsaturated fatty acids. So a woman who wants to live in abundance should not rely on her mind alone. And, of course, we shouldn’t forget that you can talk about a lot with an intelligent man, and that’s what we love!
Masculinity (15%)
Although women claim gender equality in business, politics, and science, they are forced to recognize the right of men to primacy in matters of ensuring our own security. The tranquility of charming ladies is threatened by everything, from a fictitious bedside monster from horror films to very real characters from a summary of incidents. Therefore, it is nice to have a strong, muscular and courageous companion nearby, ready to take risks for the sake of our trembling heart. And here it is interesting, what does a particular woman mean by the concept of masculinity? Many thousands of years ago, a man who could protect a family or tribe from enemies and bring booty was considered courageous; in the Baroque era, this image was supplemented with such concepts as gallantry and elegance, and in the era of capitalism, attention was focused on solidity and respectability. These ideas have left their mark on our perception. Thus, for one woman, masculinity is fearlessness and the ability to protect against physical threats, and for another, it is ensuring security in all areas of life.
Sense of humor (14%)
One day I was faced with a difficult choice: “Girl, I have the same dog at home as yours. If you don’t get to know me, I’ll stop feeding her.” I had to fulfill the demands of a determined young man, for the sake of saving the unfortunate dog. The first date was unforgettable: he told funny stories, parodied famous people, with some extraordinary ease he talked about seemingly serious philosophical issues. I laughed and felt absolutely calm, not afraid of making mistakes or disappointing him. A year and a half later we got married and have been together for 15 years. Judging by the survey results, not a single person can be charmed by their sense of humor. Why is this aspect so important for women? The fact is that a man who knows how to joke and laugh is associated with a feeling of joy and happiness; next to him, the mood rises and negativity goes away. It seems that he is confident, calm and will find a way out of any situation.
Material wealth (9%)
I often receive letters from men whose content boils down to one thing: “They only need a fat wallet.” Yes, I agree, there are girls who put invisible hats on middle-income men and wait for their oligarch. But we will not generalize, just as we will not deny the fact that the material aspect is important for most women. If a man is guided by a woman’s appearance, looking for one who can give him healthy offspring, then the woman chooses a man who is able to feed and protect these offspring. These are the laws of nature. It turns out that the more desirable gentleman will be the one who can snatch a large piece of mammoth, and in our time - at least fill the refrigerator with tasty and healthy products. Then each woman adds to the list of necessities based on her needs and preferences. The desires of some, indeed, can only be satisfied by an oligarch...
IN in this case only 9% of women surveyed noted the importance of material wealth. The reason for this, among other things, may be the fear of being judged by society and an attempt to protect yourself from unpleasant feelings of guilt. “No, money is not important to me,” the woman convinces herself and hopes that no one will ever call her selfish, selfish, greedy or even corrupt (yes, I have heard such characteristics from my clients).
Indulgence towards women's weaknesses (8%)
In the arsenal real woman there are some amazing tricks: saucer eyes like Puss in Boots from Shrek, a protruding capricious lip, elegant shoes in which you can stomp effectively. What can we hide, we love to be capricious and want to be pampered! A woman regards patience on the part of her man as a sure sign of love, especially if he, wrinkling his nose, says about another person: “I would not tolerate such antics.”
Appearance (6%)
The aspect of appearance took last place in the ranking of women, but this does not mean that, in the opinion of the survey participants, a man should be a little prettier than a monkey. Most likely, when answering, they imagined a man with no obvious flaws, a man of standard, pleasant appearance. Like, we don’t need Brad Pitt and Bruce Willis, they don’t have special significance hair and eye color. And if you ask survey participants whether they like a beer or toned tummy, narrow or wide hips, pumped up or frail arms? I think that the image of a man would turn out to be very handsome.
P.S. Often, women search and find the ideal man, and then want to turn him into ideal husband. Unfortunately, women's magic does not always cope with this task, because these concepts are quite different.
There is a fair opinion that a man has only one hundred percent way to attract female attention- money. But if you temporarily exclude a wallet from the list of masculine virtues, then it immediately becomes unclear: what masculine quality attracts girls the most?
In order to find out this circumstance and finally dot the i’s, a large-scale survey of women’s opinions was conducted. All the representatives of the fair sex surveyed were asked the same question: what makes a man attractive in their eyes?
The results were carefully analyzed by a group of experts, and they not only compiled a list of 20 classic masculine qualities that attract women, but also revealed a general trend. It turned out that modern women They value a man’s moral and personal qualities more than his appearance. Although, what are we telling you? Judge for yourself.
Of course, the most important thing for a woman in a man is his personal qualities and intelligence, but appearance is also of no small importance. So, what do women value in male attractiveness?
Sense of style
The way we dress says a lot about us to women. A man with a sense of style gets extra points, because if he is able to match a shirt with a tie, he will be able to appreciate how beautiful, radiant and unique his partner looks that evening. So, buy a discount card at your nearest dry cleaner, and when choosing clothes in a store, give preference to spectacular, soft tissues such as suede, cashmere and corduroy.
Beautiful face
The science of attractiveness, which man has been trying to understand since time immemorial, tells us that it's all about symmetry. Imagine that your face is divided into two parts by a vertical red line. Are its halves the same? Are your eyes aligned? Are the wings of the nose the same? The more symmetry, the more attractive your appearance. Among other things, women surveyed indicated that wide chins, prominent cheekbones and large eyes drive them crazy.
Height
A tall, handsome brunette is the ideal man for many respondents. Women admitted that they like to be shorter than men, even if height does not always mean strength.
Muscle mass
Modern men should spend more time in the bathroom than in the gym. In any case, this is what the survey data suggests. An overwhelming number of women indicated that they value a clean-shaven face more than healthy biceps. Of course, muscle mass tells a girl that you will be able to stand up for yourself and for her, but, nevertheless, a neat, well-groomed man more chances to win her heart.
Good physical form
A beautiful body speaks of discipline and self-control of its owner. So, if things don’t work out with your body, don’t be upset: practice discipline and self-control.
Loyalty
A woman's desire to be confident in her partner's affection is explained by natural instincts. The girl wants to know for sure that today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow the man will bring “prey” to her house, her children, and not go to that painted otter from the neighboring “cave”.
Kindness
Young girls fall for good guys, but more experienced women are attracted to kindness. In other words, if on a date at a restaurant a girl sees how condescending you were towards the waitress who accidentally spilled a bottle of Bordeaux on your trousers, she will conclude that her mistakes will also be forgiven.
Honesty
The presence of such a quality as honesty in a man tells a girl that her boyfriend is potentially inclined to kindness, caring, decency and long term relationship. If the latter is not part of your plans, you know what to do - start lying shamelessly.
Intelligence
A resourceful, intelligent man is a source of women's pride. Well, who else would have thought of buying Chinese blue bed linen and becoming Avatar overnight? A man who can solve problems gives women a sense of confidence; It’s never boring with a man who constantly works on himself.
Passion
Have you ever wondered why girls fall for pop stars? The stars behave passionately and ardently. Women love displays of passion. Do you want to win a girl's heart? Become a passionate fan of equestrian sports, the work of the impressionists, the Humane Society, and finally.
Generosity
The survey showed that women over 35 value generosity the most. Please note that the word “generosity” does not mean going to a restaurant on March 8th. In a woman's understanding generous man- this is not only the one who gives her gorgeous bouquets, but also devotes his time and listens to her carefully.
Fatherly qualities
The presence of fatherly qualities (at least the inclinations for them) makes you an object of female sympathy. Patience and care are two qualities that girls like. If you haven't become a father yet and can't describe how cute your little son decorated a thousand-dollar Carden suit with felt-tip pens, just tell us or think of your favorite nephew, to whom you regularly bring a melted cone from McDonald's.
Listening skills
Attention! A woman feels safer and more secure when she knows that her man is willing to put down his laptop and listen to her from start to finish. Magic words: " I'm here, honey. Tell me what happened».
Romance
Romance has a direct effect on the right illogical hemisphere of the female brain. Every girl dreams of being conquered. This method has been tested by many generations of men (do not follow Romeo - he ended badly).
The art of sex
We're not just talking about orgasms here. Girls believe that if a man takes into account their interests in bed, then he will do the same the rest of the day. So taking care of her pleasure is a key factor in your battle glory.
Good earnings
At least one in five women surveyed noted that a man's ability to earn money affects his attractiveness. If you are a goal-oriented person, women see you as a reliable life partner.
Self confidence
When a man is confident in himself and his abilities, this feeling is transmitted to his other half. Showing that you are able to cope with both a rude stranger at a bus stop and difficult situation, you tell your girlfriend that she has nothing to worry about with you.
But in general, the coveted self-confidence, from the point of view of psychologists and from the point of view of ordinary people, are completely different things. How we all value self-confidence and long to gain it! It is considered almost one of the main virtues of the modern civilized world. Who do we imagine as an example of a confident person? Well, some badass leader of a political party like Zhirinovsky, a Nobel laureate or a bank president stepping out of a Mercedes... Or just the President. But that's how you imagine it.
But psychologists have a completely different opinion on this matter. They are firmly convinced that one hundred percent is confident in himself... the lucky one who sits on a stump in the middle of a clearing, serenely gnaws on a hump and feels completely fine. By the way, most often people who have a fairly successful career turn to a psychotherapist with the problem of self-doubt.
True, they themselves do not complain about a lack of confidence and often do not realize this problem. It disguises itself as other problems: excessive anxiety or aggressiveness, loss of taste for life, etc.
Reliability
Three out of four women interviewed admitted that all their lives they have been looking for a man who will follow them like behind a stone wall. That is why this quality is in second place on our list. A man's sense of responsibility, like an electromagnetic coil, attracts women.
Sense of humor
The ability to make people laugh is so highly valued by women that we had to put it first in the ranking of classic personal qualities men who girls like. If you have a sense of humor, give yourself a plus. Its presence indicates that you are not a bore and have an easy-going approach to life.
Almost every man dreams of looking desirable and handsome in the eyes of women, but what exactly do they need? Are you also interested in this question? Then let's read what the women themselves say.
Loyalty (84%)
8 out of 10 women ranked “fidelity” as the first quality out of 10 attributes they consider sexy in a man. A woman's tendency to be attached is her natural trait. Therefore, learn to be faithful to your choice and then you can be called a real man. Confirm your loyalty with deeds, but also do not forget about your words. Tell your beloved as often as possible that you will never leave her.
Reliability (75%)
Three out of four women say they are looking for a reliable person who delivers on promises and gets things done. Be responsible, even if it just means remembering minor things, is a good sign that you are capable of more serious actions.
Kindness (67%)
Young women may still fall for "bad" guys, but more experienced women Men are attracted to kindness because it gives them confidence in their chosen one. In other words, if you treat those around you well, not just your loved one, it will show that you have a good heart no matter the circumstances.
Moral purity (66%)
Having the courage to tell the truth is a sign for a woman that you are capable of being a good, caring, worthy partner for her for a long time. Avoid any form of lying. A small, innocent, in your opinion, lie can sow distrust in the heart of your chosen one and it will be difficult to restore it. Just think, why would you lie?
Fatherly qualities (51%)
What you good father(or you can become one) is a role model that demonstrates that you are patient and caring and treat a woman as a partner. If you have not yet become a father, then tell her about your beloved niece or nephew, about how you love children. Be considerate of children when meeting friends' families, for example.
Sense of humor (77%)
The ability to laugh at the troubles of this world is a mandatory quality that women consider necessary for men. It's a plus for you if you can make them laugh. Humor will tell a woman that you can laugh at what you read and can easily bear the many difficulties that come in your life. WITH a cheerful man It’s easy for a woman, the little things inside her are revealed happy child when he knows how to joke at the right time and create a relaxed atmosphere.
Education and intelligence (55%)
A well-rounded man is someone she can boast about. Men who take responsibility for solving problems make women feel safe and never get bored with men who pay attention to their self-education. A woman should feel that he is able to make important decisions and think things through.
Self-confidence (41%)
A man who feels safe will make a woman feel safe too. Showing you can handle it strangers or situations, thereby you will tell the woman that she also does not need to be afraid of anything.
Generosity/sacrifice (38%)
This quality is more valued by women over 35 years of age than by those younger than this age. Generosity, however, does not just mean dining at a four-star restaurant. Your generosity towards other people will show that you have enough and are not worried about being broke if you help someone. Also, your willingness to sacrifice your time and listen to her is something that women value very much.
Listening skills (53%)
Pay attention to her. A woman feels comfortable and secure when she knows that her man has put his affairs aside and is listening to her. For her these are the magic words: “I’m here.” Tell me everything." It is not always necessary to immediately offer a solution to all her problems. Perhaps she wasn't going to solve them right now. But the opportunity to tell someone about her feelings will calm her down and maybe even help her come to some kind of decision herself.
Romance (48%)
Romance is a quality for which the right hemisphere of the brain is responsible. Every woman dreams of a man kneeling at her feet. Romance requires courage because you express your desires to a woman and show your vulnerable side, which women find irresistible.
Ability to be sensual in bed (35%)
A woman knows that if a man takes care of her in bed, he will also take care of her outside of it. Your enthusiasm for her body is more important than your sexual prowess. This means that you need to listen to the rhythm and desire of your beloved, feel her and try to completely please her, and not yourself. When this happens 100% of everyone in a marriage, it's amazing!
Cooking, cleaning, etc. (23%)
Self-sufficiency means you won't have expectations of her being like your mom. Help her with cooking or cleaning from time to time. You can choose a special day where you do it completely on your own or without a schedule and just occasionally participate in what she does around the house. Spending time together like this brings you closer and enhances your sense of security. The main thing is in what frame of mind you start helping!
Earning opportunities (21%)
One out of five women surveyed said that a man’s success in his career contributes to his sexuality and reinforces confidence in him as a powerful fortress behind which one can hide in times of trouble. If you have demonstrated talent, the ability to achieve goals, and you have a job, this will give a woman confidence that you can provide for her family. Material wealth, not necessarily excessive, but one that makes it possible to cover the needs of the family, makes a woman feel protected next to you.
Sense of style (30%)
The way you dress affects the woman you live with, and she knows it. A man who knows how to choose the right shirt and tie will notice when she is well dressed. But you don't always have to be dressed in a suit or a perfectly ironed shirt to be stylish. Let you have your own style.
Pleasant face (26%)
The science of being attractive, which has been studied far and wide, says that it's all about symmetrical facial features. Imagine that you have a dotted red line drawn vertically through the center of your face, passing through your nose. Are your facial features the same in shape and placement on both sides of the line? Are your eyes and ears at the same level? The more one side of your face is symmetrical to the other, the more attractive you are. Women also note that men with wide chins, high cheekbones and big eyes. The best way Improving your appearance means smiling more.
High growth (15%)
Tall, dark and handsome are not all the qualities that women value in men. They say they like to feel smaller than their men, but height doesn't necessarily mean strength. They will feel comfortable without towering over you.
Clean and muscular (13%)
Spend more time in front of the bathroom mirror and less time looking in the mirror at the gym. Almost three times more women They value a clean-shaven face over the ability to do barbell push-ups. Muscles will help you protect yourself from competitors and convince a woman that you won't drop her when she falls, but your appearance is more important to her than the size of your biceps.
Women believe that if a man is in good physical shape, this is a sign of his discipline and self-control. This tells a woman that you are on the same level in all areas of life.
Is it not easy to meet such qualities? Cultivate the man within you, because this is your essence and purpose. A woman wants to be close to a real man. At the same time, you may have noticed that not all qualities are so important! Try to work on yours the best sides, and then develop new qualities in yourself, then you cannot avoid success and victories over yourself! Your woman will appreciate it!
We will be happy to talk about this topic in the comments to the article. And, of course, you can contact us using the form indicated on the page.
11Soul binding 24.09.2017
Dear readers, today in our column we will talk about what qualities women value in men. Interesting topic, Truth? And for both men and women. This might help men understand us women better. And it will allow women to look at themselves from the outside and think once again about why we generally value and love our men. And, of course, love them even more for it. The column is led by Elena Khutornaya, writer, blogger, author of intuitive cards, and I give the floor to Elena.
Greetings, dear readers of Irina’s blog. In the comments to our articles, wishes were expressed that we write not only for a female, but also for a male audience. After discussing this with Irina, we decided that this was just the right topic that would also be of interest to men. So, what qualities do women love and value in men?
Women cannot always answer this question unambiguously, because we are also attracted to different things in men. And sometimes, in order to see some qualities in your man, you have to give up others. But the main thing is not that a man should be perfection and combine all conceivable virtues, but that he should have exactly what is most valuable to us to see in a loved one.
However, we women still lack something in a relationship. And then we begin to dream about some missing qualities in our men. At the same time, we forget that every advantage has a downside. And are we ready to accept this downside along with the desired quality or, again, can we only come to the conclusion that, after all, our man is the best for us?
So let's talk about valuable best masculine qualities and what difficulties they can create.
Reliability
Despite emancipation, our genetic memory always turns out to be stronger, so very often, first of all, we look for this in men - guarantees of reliability, stability, that strongest shoulder and strong wall that will allow us, fragile and weak, to feel protected.
Reverse side
Reliable people are often quite predictable even in their spontaneity. Their goals are rational and practical, they themselves are serious and thorough. It also often happens that while taking responsibility for providing and protecting loved ones, they reserve the right to make all important decisions, so you need to be prepared for the fact that you will have to sacrifice your interests in some way.
Thrift
Many women dream of their husband helping with the housework, taking care of the children, and solving household issues. I could cook, do laundry, and clean the floor. Not to mention, of course, the men's work - nailing, screwing, repairing, looking after cars, getting insurance on time. There would probably be nothing more to dream about in life if men helped us like that.
Reverse side
From practical experience, being around such a man, you yourself have to be very economical. And you need to be prepared for the fact that he will notice that the floor has not been washed, that things have not been put away, that the food is yesterday’s, and that there is expired kefir on the bottom shelf of the refrigerator.
Attractiveness
Of course, every woman wants her man to be attractive, but this parameter is so subjective that it is unlikely to be possible to say anything specific about what this attractiveness should consist of. Some people like muscular handsome men, others respectable men older. Stylishness and polish are important to some, while others prefer discreet elegance or slight negligence in appearance. But it definitely benefits a relationship when a woman is pleased with how her man looks. So men should emphasize their strengths, hide their shortcomings, but, of course, they need to remain themselves.
Reverse side
Often women choose not the men they like, but those who are able to make a favorable impression on others. However, what is more important for us, in the end, that our friends envy us or that we ourselves look at our man with admiration and love?
Self confidence
What truly adorns a man is self-confidence. So even without being handsome, but having self-confidence, he will seem very attractive in the eyes of women. With such men, our confidence also increases that, if necessary, he will be able to protect, achieve, and support.
Reverse side
In some situations, this confidence can turn against us. And if we lack this confidence, then it will be easy to feel vulnerable, and this is not always pleasant.
Sense of humor
Nothing brightens a relationship more than the opportunity to laugh together with a loved one. When our ideas about what is funny coincide, it is so unifying - there is little that compares with this feeling. A man’s ability to approach life and himself with humor is also very valuable - thanks to this, many things can be experienced much easier.
Reverse side
This quality can also be turned against us, and how better man knows our weak points, the more painful his jokes towards us can be. Again, if humor is more manifested not in wit, but in playfulness, then this can often be perceived as frivolity.
Ability to understand and feel
Attention and understanding - these qualities in men can conquer any woman. This is why we love the period of falling in love in a relationship so much, because men at this time are so open, generous with feedback, compliments, they are ready to listen to us, support, console, notice our moods, changes in appearance. Love for a woman in many ways begins precisely from such moments, which is why it is so difficult to look for warmth in a relationship when, having experienced a burst of love, men return to their business and notice us only when the time is right for sex. But sex for a woman often begins with communication, with the feeling of contact with a partner. So the significance of this point for relationships is very difficult to underestimate.
Reverse side
Moods are felt and captured by those men who are quite sensitive themselves. This means that they will have to experience their moods quite acutely, not only the good ones, but also the bad ones. Again, if you ever want to hide your condition from such a man, it is unlikely to succeed - he will definitely notice and will not calm down until he finds out the reasons.
Sensuality
Just as in the case of attractiveness, everything here is very individual, but, of course, any woman in a relationship would like to realize her sensuality. And for this you need suitable man. This does not mean that he must be extremely skillful and sophisticated. The main thing is that he again knows how to feel and understand, and sometimes help the woman open up. So again, what is important here is the man’s desire to pay attention to the woman.
Reverse side
It happens that women dream of a more experienced lover, they think that this would help them learn to get more pleasure from intimacy. But often it’s not the lack of experience of their men, but the fact that they themselves are not ready to open up to it.
Mind
Smart men are always very attractive in the eyes of women. As we have already said, for women, love and intimacy begin with communication, and what communication can bring more pleasure than with an intelligent and interesting man?
Reverse side
It’s sad, but in kitchens, after many years of marriage, intelligent conversations are rarely held. And it turns out that various other virtues are much more important for life than intelligence. Yet again smart men Intellectual snobbery is often characteristic, and this quality can have rather unpleasant manifestations in everyday life.
Loyalty
Let's complete our list with such an important quality as fidelity. Every woman wants to be the only one for her man. So those relationships in which she feels exactly like this are valuable. This does not mean that a man must refuse any contact with other women to achieve this. But even if he communicates with them, his woman should know and feel that she still remains special to him. This quality has no downside when a woman responds to a man in the same way.
Be wise, my dears, do not demand too much from others, but at the same time look for in people what is really important to you. After all, our happiness depends on this, and there is nothing better when next to us is a person whom we love and appreciate for all his virtues and whom we invariably admire.
With warmth,
Khutornaya Elena
I thank Lena for this conversation. Sometimes it really is so useful to remember all the good things for which we should be grateful to our men. And the men were probably interested in reading everyone’s thoughts. Perhaps this will be a reason to think and even change something in life. Or just enjoy your happy relationship.
Dear readers, you may also be interested in other articles on the topic:
And for the soul, today we will listen to a wonderful composition by an Italian group. Ricchi e Poveri - Cosa Sei. How much time has passed, but how wonderful everything is.
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