More and more often, recently, parents decide to give birth and raise only one child. At the same time, of course, their conscience torments them, because there are a variety of rumors about children who are raised alone in the family, and not all of them are pleasant. As mentioned earlier, such children are considered to be selfish, spoiled and suffer from problems of premature development. But, not only the parents of their only son or daughter have a tendency to pamper their beloved child beyond measure. As a result, children's rooms are bursting at the seams with an abundance of toys, and the children themselves spend too much time sitting in front of the TV or computer. And this is quite understandable - after all, their parents indulge them in everything. However, one of the methods of education is the word “no”. Set rules that both parties must adhere to. That's what's important. The result will exceed all expectations, with how easily children begin to follow the rules if mom and dad make it clear to them that fits of rage and hysterics do not affect them. .
From birth, only children develop in a special atmosphere. Surrounded for a long time only by adults, they receive a more limited personal experience compared to children with brothers and sisters. Psychologists at the beginning of our century were very skeptical about such a family structure. The words of the American psychologist S. Hall that being an only child means already having a disease in oneself were constantly quoted in specialized and popular literature. However, such an unambiguous assessment is not sufficiently substantiated and has recently encountered more and more objections. But let's take a look at the peculiarities of raising an only child in a family.
Often our hero considers himself the center of his small world. Parents, grandparents, as well as numerous relatives shower him with signs of attention. Excessive care can lead to the child losing touch with the outside world. But children need to learn how to handle with your own feelings. Because it's very difficult for little man cope with disappointment, boredom, frustration or anger. Feelings must be experienced on your own and overcome on your own. Therefore, a trusting atmosphere in the parental home is very important - an atmosphere in which you can openly talk about how you feel.
Parents very often behave like masters with their only children. Any activities that pose a potential danger are strictly prohibited. And such prohibitions affect creative thinking and children's curiosity. Even if it is very difficult, you need to try to overcome yourself and allow your child to learn on their own.
Only children in the family really miss relationships with brothers or sisters. Therefore, with other children they behave modestly and uptight. From the early age the child must communicate with his peers.
Anyone who has experienced problems and disagreements with brothers and sisters would never believe that only only children in the family do not like to share their things. By nature, children are focused on themselves, and only proper upbringing can teach them values and behavioral norms. And the parent’s willingness to help and his own social position can become guidelines for the child.
Only children in a family do not necessarily become single children in the future. If they play with other children, they will certainly learn to build relationships. It is important to let the child decide on his own who to be friends with, well, without going to extremes, of course. This will strengthen his self-esteem. Be careful with criticism. You need to praise your child more often, but only in cases where the praise is truly deserved.
Children who are raised alone in the family often have a more intense connection with their parents, which arises due to the fact that both parents devote themselves to their child in free time. The absence of sibling rivalry allows relationships to develop harmoniously.
The main thing in the development of an only child is that he long time communicates closely only with adults. Being alone, small in the land of giants is not so easy and simple. Not being able to compare himself in a family setting with brothers and sisters of a similar age, and seeing in front of him only unattainable, capable and capable adults, the child acutely feels his weakness and imperfection. Thus, indirectly, the child becomes discouraged by the developmental situation itself and may ultimately lose faith in his own abilities.
Developing in an atmosphere of excessive care, only children not only lose confidence, but also get used to taking service and parental help for granted, demanding it when necessary and not necessary. The child begins to feel strength in his weakness, abuses the attention and care of others. This is how parents often simply fall into the snare of a little despot: he needs help in everything, he cannot be denied anything. Otherwise - hysteria, tears, anger or another demonstration of weakness. The child sometimes uses less familiar ways of manipulating the parents’ behavior. For example, he demonstrates night terrors, somatic disorders (headaches, stomach pains, etc.) in order to keep his parents in constant care of him, in order to insist that it be the way he (she) wants. Children become little tyrants, and parents, although they feel exhausted because of this, do not understand what is happening: they think that the child is simply overly sensitive or sick.
Some obstacles to the mental development of children have a very specific name - greenhouse conditions, when the child is groomed, cuddled, pampered, caressed - in a word, carried in their arms. Because of such excessive attention mental development it inevitably slows down. As a result of the excessive indulgence with which his parents surround him, he is sure to face very serious difficulties and disappointments when he finds himself outside home circle, since he will also expect attention from other people, which he is used to in his parents’ house. For the same reason, he will begin to take himself too seriously. Precisely because his own horizons are too small, many little things will seem too big and significant to him. As a result, interacting with people will be much more difficult for him than for other children. He will begin to withdraw from contacts and seclude himself.
How to prevent all this? With the help of the second child. But if some special problems can be resolved in a similar way, then where is the confidence that by giving birth to another child, you can immediately achieve complete adaptation of the first, although overprotectiveness will already be divided into two children, and maybe it will increase. In any case, we must by all means overcome our desire to raise a child in greenhouse conditions. It can be argued that raising an only son or only daughter is much more difficult than raising several children. Even if the family is experiencing some financial difficulties, it cannot be limited to one child. Only child very soon becomes the center of the family. The concerns of the father and mother, focused on this child, usually exceed the useful norm. Parental love in this case is distinguished by a certain nervousness. The illness of this child or death is endured very hard by such a family, and the fear of such misfortune always faces the parents and deprives them of the necessary peace of mind. Very often, an only child gets used to his exclusive position and becomes a real despot in the family. It is very difficult for parents to slow down their love for him and their worries, and willy-nilly they raise an egoist.
For mental development, each child requires his own space in which he can move freely. He needs internal and external freedom, free dialogue with the outside world, so that he is not constantly supported by the hand of his parents. A child cannot do without a dirty face, torn pants and fights.
An only child is often denied such space. Consciously or not, the role of a model child is imposed on him. He must say hello especially politely, read poetry especially expressively, he must be an exemplary cleaner and stand out among other children. Ambitious plans are being made for him for the future. Each manifestation of life is carefully observed, with hidden concern. Lack of good advice the child does not experience it throughout childhood. This attitude towards him carries the danger that the only child will turn into a spoiled, dependent, insecure, overestimating, scattered child.
They say that those who grew up alone in a family always envy those who have brothers or sisters. Is it worth it? Some come from large families They may object: “Who needs brothers anyway?” We cannot agree with them, but here are at least 17 reasons to believe that small family- this is amazing.
1. It’s not scary to get your own home
Comfortable pastime begins to be directly related to independence, and being alone with yourself is no longer scary. And as a child, the moments when you return from school and there is no one at home were generally your favorite.
2. You're good at choosing gifts for your loved ones.
You had no one to consult with when, as a child, you purchased something for a holiday for your parents. As an adult, you understand that it is you who are being consulted about your choice.
3. You are a master of alone time.
You never get bored because you can always cheer yourself up and figure out what to do. Perhaps it's watching programs on TV, playing games on the phone, or reading.
4. You don't have to assign roles
The dog in Monopoly is always yours. What clothes to wear when going on a visit? The choice is yours!
5. Choice is nice
Since you've never fought with your sibling over it, you actually enjoy sharing things with people. Of course you can wear my dress! Here, help yourself to some cheesecake!
6. You've never had to fight for your parents' attention.
Of course, you are their only child.
7. You always had a private room
And it could be as dirty or clean as you wish.
8. New experience
Ironically, this also means that when you start sharing a dorm room with roommates, it will be a new and fun experience. You may, for example, have to put up with the fact that you have to turn off the lights when your neighbor goes to bed earlier, but you will quickly get used to these concessions.
9. Sociability
You will not be shy to talk to strangers and make friends with someone. As a child, when you wanted to play with someone, you had to find friends on your own, and you had to practice the sociability that can now be so useful in class or at work.
10. Friendship with adults
You are comfortable talking to people who are older than you because you have been surrounded by adults since childhood. You may even have many friends who are older than you.
11. You are not spoiled
You always happily accepted the gift that your parents bought. You had no one to look to to compare and demand, for example, a Jeep for Barbie. You always had a lot of gifts for all the holidays.
12. Your best friends replace your sisters and brothers.
Sometimes even parents become attached to them and miss them if they don’t see them visiting for a long time.
13. Vacations with family are fantastic!
While you were a child, your parents probably invited relatives or friends with children with them so that you would have someone to play with. IN adolescence you were allowed to take one of your friends on vacation so that it wouldn’t be boring. And as an adult, you like to travel with your parents because it's cool and you can finally communicate on common topics.
14. You are perfectly adapted to all conditions.
And the reason is simple: all your life you have had to solve problems on your own and cope with difficulties. There was no time to blame anyone or seek help.
15. No need to share
You've never had to worry about someone eating your favorite treat before you try it. Unless dad could, but fortunately, you could make him feel guilty with puppy dog eyes - and then he would buy more.
16. The right to choose is yours
You always independently chose which film to watch, because you were the only one who watched it. Aladdin for the third time this week? No problem!
17. You have the best qualities of an introvert and an extrovert.
You are good at communicating with anyone, but at the same time you are great at being completely alone.
1 . features of raising one child in a family.
From birth, only children are raised in a special atmosphere. Surrounded only by adults, they acquire a narrower personal experience compared to those children who have brothers and sisters. Even in the last century, psychologists were skeptical about such a family structure. But this unambiguous assessment is not entirely justified, and today it encounters many objections.
The only child in the family For a long time, communicates closely only with adults. But being alone in the “land of giants” is not easy. The child does not have the opportunity to compare himself on a daily basis with brothers and sisters of approximately the same age. Constantly seeing in front of him only unattainable adults who know everything, the child acutely experiences personal weakness and childhood imperfection. As a result of loss of control over the situation, the child may lose faith in his own strength.
The only child is constantly in the field of view of the parents. Being vigilant, they note the moments when something does not work out for him, and if the slightest difficulties arise, the parents rush to provide all possible help. As a result of such an attitude, the child eventually begins to feel his own helplessness.
Developing in an atmosphere of immense care, only children get used to accepting the helpfulness and help of their parents as a matter of course and demand it in any situation, even when help is not required. The child begins to realize the strength of his own weakness and begins to abuse the participation and care of others. Therefore, parents often fall into the trap of a little tyrant: he needs help in everything and cannot be denied anything. Otherwise, the refusal will be followed by an attack of hysteria, tears, whims, or a demonstration of weakness. Sometimes the child uses other methods of manipulating parental behavior. For example, he complains of night terrors, somatic problems (abdominal pain, headaches, etc.). This is done so that the parents always take care of him and give in to all his whims. Children imperceptibly turn into little despots, while parents, although they feel internal fatigue, do not understand what is happening: they conclude that the child is either very sensitive or really sick with something.
An only child does not have the opportunity to communicate closely with peers, which often leads to the formation of an incorrect self-esteem. An only child tends to consider himself an extraordinary person and to place himself above those around him. At school, the child's inflated self-image is often revealed, but he strives with all his might to maintain a false image of himself.
Due to the lack of communication with brothers and sisters, it is more difficult for only children to find mutual language with peers. They do not have full experience of communication in a children's group, do not know how to adapt to the needs of other children, and do not strive to take into account their interests. Often an only child differs from his peers in his vocabulary. His speech contains many terms and adult expressions, often incomprehensible to himself and his peers; he has difficulty understanding the jokes of other children.
These features lead to the fact that only children are less popular among their peers, which, of course, affects the formation of the child’s personality. Experiencing a lack of close communication with children, only children begin to look for new contacts at an early age. They persuade their parents to “give” or “buy” them a sister or brother, or they passionately desire to have a pet.
But, besides the disadvantages, there are also positive aspects to the situation of raising only children. Parents give them more attention and love. Only if parents “go too far” with the educational process, do not yield to the child’s initiative, do not provide him with the opportunity to try his strength, to cope with the obstacles that arise on his own, there will be much more harm than good. Unfortunately, the tendency of most parents is exactly this: since the parents have only one child. But there are parents who manage to overcome their “weakness” and create normal conditions for their child. harmonious development.
Parents of an only child have a high chance of developing his abilities, showing more attention to his inner world, his thoughts and experiences. The closer the parents are to the child, the more actively they influence the formation of his personality.
So, we have found out that the negative and positive aspects of parenting in families with an only child leave the most vivid imprint on his personality. Socially, only children have a number of advantages over their peers. More time is devoted to their development and training; tutors are hired for this purpose; children attend various clubs. In the future, only children receive better financial support, which plays an important role in starting an independent life.
Features of raising an only child in a family. There are two most common points of view on this matter. First: the only child turns out to be more emotionally stable than other children, because he does not know the worries associated with rivalry between brothers. Second: an only child has to overcome more difficulties than usual in order to acquire mental balance, because he lacks a brother or sister. No matter what psychologists say, the life of one - the only child in a family often develops in such a way that confirms precisely this second point of view. Difficulties, however, are not absolutely inevitable, and yet they occur so often that it would be foolish not to notice them.
2. positive features in play. units reb.
Despite the increase in the birth rate and the increase in the number of children on playgrounds, many families are limited to one child. Some parents, making a choice in favor of one child, are based on considerations of insufficient financial status, while others, who are more affluent, complain about a lack of time.
Parents of an only child believe that he will not need anything, will develop better and will not be deprived of their attention, like children from large families. They are right in some ways, there is another side to the coin.
The intellectual development of an only child is ahead of his peers; he not only begins to speak earlier, but also read, since his parents pay a lot of attention to him and try to develop his abilities.
Usually, such a child “grows up” early, knows how to communicate with adults on equal terms and express his opinion. Such children have quite high self-esteem. It is also believed that an only child will grow up to be emotionally stable because he does not worry about sibling rivalry.
Having many opportunities, he can fully realize himself and take his rightful place in society.
3. negative features
At the same time, an only child may experience difficulties communicating with other children and has a harder time joining the team. Parents are often overprotective of their child, trying to predict his desires, so it is difficult for such a child to solve complex problems and cope with stress. In addition, he may become disappointed in people, because he expects from them the same attention and concessions that his relatives made. This is especially evident at school, where the child expects the same attitude from the teacher as from his parents and does not know how to share his attention with his classmates. And if in a family the child’s interests are put above all else, he may not only grow up to be an egoist, but also not be able to take into account the interests of others.
Very often, high hopes are placed on an only child, or with the help of him, parents want to fulfill their unfulfilled dreams and plans. All this leaves an imprint on the child’s psyche, and if he is unable to meet his parents’ expectations, he becomes depressed and insecure.
Some obstacles to the mental development of children have a very specific name - greenhouse conditions, when the child is groomed, cuddled, pampered, caressed - in a word, carried in their arms. Because of such excessive attention, his mental development inevitably slows down. As a result of the excessive indulgence with which his parents surround him, he will certainly face very serious difficulties and disappointments when he finds himself outside the home circle, since he will also expect from other people the attention that he was accustomed to in his parents' home. For the same reason, he will begin to take himself too seriously. Precisely because his own horizons are too small, many little things will seem too big and significant to him. As a result, interacting with people will be much more difficult for him than for other children. He will begin to withdraw from contacts and seclude himself. He has never had to share parental love with his brothers or sisters, not to mention games, his own room and clothes, and it is difficult for him to find a common language with other children and his place in the children's community.
The only child very soon becomes the center of the family. The concerns of the father and mother, focused on this child, usually exceed the useful norm. Parental love in this case is distinguished by a certain nervousness. The illness of this child or death is endured very hard by such a family, and the fear of such misfortune always faces the parents and deprives them of the necessary peace of mind. Very often, an only child gets used to his exclusive position and becomes a real despot in the family. It is very difficult for parents to slow down their love for him and their worries, and willy-nilly they raise an egoist.
For mental development, every child requires mental space in which he could move freely. He needs internal and external freedom, free dialogue with the outside world, so that he is not constantly supported by the hand of his parents. A child cannot do without a dirty face, torn pants and fights.
An only child is often denied such space. Consciously or not, the role of a model child is imposed on him. He must say hello especially politely, read poetry especially expressively, he must be an exemplary cleaner and stand out among other children. Ambitious plans are being made for him for the future. Each manifestation of life is carefully observed, with hidden concern. The child does not experience a lack of good advice throughout his childhood. This attitude towards him carries the danger that the only child will turn into a spoiled, dependent, insecure, overestimating, scattered child.
4.Problems of parents when raising one child
It can be argued that raising an only son or only daughter is much more difficult than raising several children. Even if the family is experiencing some financial difficulties, it cannot be limited to one child. The only child very soon becomes the center of the family. The concerns of the father and mother, focused on this child, usually exceed the useful norm. Parental love in this case is distinguished by a certain nervousness. The illness of this child or death is endured very hard by such a family, and the fear of such misfortune always faces the parents and deprives them of the necessary peace of mind. Very often, an only child gets used to his exclusive position and becomes a real despot in the family. It is very difficult for parents to slow down their love for him and their worries, and willy-nilly they raise an egoist. Undoubtedly, parents with an only child usually pay excessive attention to him. In short, they care too much about him just because he is the only one they have, when in fact he is just the first. And indeed, few of us are able to calmly and competently treat our firstborn the way we later treat subsequent children. The main reason here is inexperience. There are, however, other reasons, which are not so easy to detect.
For mental development, every child requires mental space in which he could move freely. He needs internal and external freedom, free dialogue with the outside world, so that he is not constantly supported by the hand of his parents. A child cannot do without a dirty face, torn pants and fights.
An only child is often denied such space. Consciously or not, the role of a model child is imposed on him. He must say hello especially politely, read poetry especially expressively, he must be an exemplary cleaner and stand out among other children. Ambitious plans are being made for him for the future. Each manifestation of life is carefully observed, with hidden concern. The child does not experience a lack of good advice throughout his childhood. This attitude towards him carries the danger that the only child will turn into a spoiled, dependent, insecure, overestimating, scattered child.
An only child, as a rule, is ahead of his peers in intellectual development, because he alone gets all the strength, all the time and attention of his parents and relatives. Such children begin to speak and read earlier, and they work with them a lot, trying to develop any abilities.
Being predominantly in adult company, the child often hears serious conversations and learns to communicate on equal terms with adults. He gets used to the fact that his opinion is taken into account, and his self-esteem increases. But many adults admit to themselves: when raising one child, it is difficult to avoid difficulties and distortions. And what's in big family children receive naturally, in the process of communication, play, due to the need to build relationships with a variety of people, an only child can receive it only thanks to some special efforts made by adults.
Psychologists advise parents to first understand why they no longer want children. It is important. Having a child not for his own sake, not for his life, but for himself is not an uncommon option. In this case, all expectations, all hopes are transferred to the only child, the parents do not accept him for who he is, but form an ideal image and integrate the baby into an artificial scheme. This can lead to deviations in the behavior and development of the child. It must be recognized that a child is a completely separate being, he has the right to his own path of development and really needs to be treated with respect.
An only child needs to be provided with those ways of relating to people and to life that are naturally formed in large families. And it would be good for adults to know about the main age periods of child development, so as not to force the child to jump over the steps of this natural, nature
Many parents, remembering their bleak childhood in kindergarten, do not want the same for their children. IN best case scenario the child goes to kindergarten before entering school. If you have one child, send him to kindergarten, preferably no later than four years of age. He really needs a team!
Parents who have only one child live under great stress. Their child is both the first and the last, he is their only chance to show their parenting abilities, so they strive to do everything right.
Parents' concern and attachment to the child increases if this child is the only one, because in this case the parents and the child are “tuned” to each other. Close intimacy forces both parties to tirelessly worry about how to bring joy to each other. Often one feels emotional discomfort when the other gets into trouble or is upset about something.
In such an intense relationship, it often happens that parents sincerely want to give their child the best, and the child feels obligated to live up to the parents' expectations.
Living under unflagging parental attention, the child treats them as the most important people in the world and enjoys the same attitude towards himself.
The union of two parents and one child seems unbreakable, and when divorce breaks up such a family, the child experiences great shock.
The world that revolved around him was destroyed. Now there is one less parent around him to solve his problems. Because the live-in mother is now busier and less available, she delays or even refuses to fulfill requests that were previously granted automatically. An only child is forced to adapt to his mother's reactions, which seem new and unpleasant. Divorce often takes away a lot from the only child in a family from what he is used to.
It can be painful for an only child to see his parents alone because being with one of them makes him miss the other. The child yearns for the old cozy trinity that they once formed together. This pain becomes immeasurably greater if divorced parents cannot get rid of their grudges against each other. Their ongoing confrontation tears apart the child's faithful heart and gives rise to a deep internal conflict. So close, so loved - whose side should I take? The greatest joy divorced parents can bring to their only child is by reconciling with each other, and the sooner the better. Remember that only children have a particularly difficult time with divorce.
Beyond the impact of divorce, there are common characteristics common to most only children that can sometimes be a cause for concern. This is the very feeling of uniqueness, which entails difficulties in emancipation, socialization, and acceptance of social norms.
Most only children have a clear sense of self (this also applies to first children who were also only for some time). Their self-expression and self-development are encouraged, their interests and capabilities are taken to heart. Their efforts are encouraged and their successes are rewarded.
Taking advantage of the increased attention and support of their parents, they can quickly become imbued with an exaggerated sense of their own importance; their self-esteem, as a rule, is inflated. In relationships with people, only children often consider their own opinions to a much greater extent than those of others. In this case, they must be taught to respect the legitimate needs of others.
Today, not many families can afford to have several children. Children- great responsibility, they require special attention. Parents are sometimes unable to provide it because they work all day long and return home tired only late in the evening. In addition, the financial situation of the family also plays an important role. Providing for a child is a very expensive process, so parents, even if they want, cannot decide on a second baby. Are you the only child in your family and are you afraid that he will grow up to be selfish? Let's try to figure out how to raise one child.
Of course, when there is only one in the family one child he receives not only all the attention, love and care of his parents, but also all material benefits. The baby has no sisters or brothers, and therefore there is no one to compare with. And this can negatively affect the development of his personality. In most cases, such children compare themselves with adults, as a result of which the child’s psyche may suffer.
The only child is the center of everyone's attention.
The most important error parents - maintaining the child’s sense of the center of the universe. If something doesn’t work out for him, all family members immediately provide help. However, this is wrong. Next time the child will not even try to do something himself. What for? After all, his parents will do everything for him.
A repetition of this situation will lead to the child demanding help even when he can cope on his own. As a result, the child will treat jealousy to the work of parents, to friends, constantly demanding increased attention from them.
Adaptation of the baby in the team.
If there is only one child in your family, it will be quite difficult for him to fit in team, since attention will not be paid to him at all. He will have to adapt to new rules and regime.
If a child gets into conflict situation, he can be very aggressive and touchy, because he will believe that everyone is obliged to him.
Life of an only child with adults.
In most cases, an only child experiences weakness and defenselessness in the family, since he must meet all the requirements of his parents and relatives. They all want their child to be special, to be able and know a lot. Each of them constantly monitors the child, his behavior and life in general. And this is very difficult for the baby from the point of view psyche.
The results of improper upbringing.
Raising an only child requires special effort. Constant care and fulfillment of all whims can lead to the fact that the child can become a very inadequate person.
Types personalities:
Shy.
For such a child they did everything he wanted. That's why he grows up to be a dependent person who can hardly find friends and doesn't like to show initiative and constantly needs the help of others;
Selfish.
Such a child thinks only about himself and considers himself the most the best person in the world. He does not want to adapt to other people, so he often conflicts in the team. Everything should happen according to him rules, otherwise it may cause irritation.
Families can be complete and incomplete, one-child and two-child, nuclear and three-generation, based on the remarriage of a parent... Today let's look at the features of raising an only child in a complete two-generation (nuclear) family consisting of father, mother and child.
What are the pros and cons
Single-child families have dominated Russian life (especially in big cities) for several decades. Of course, only children can expect more attention and care, adoration, compliance and love. Parents can be closer to the child, actively develop his abilities and natural inclinations, take him to art studios, creative and sports centers, teach his only languages... But the temptation to “go too far” in terms of love and care is also great. According to experts, in a one-child family, the cult of the child is more often observed, when the entire life of adults is focused around a single “treasure”, and in families with only children, the mistakes and mistakes of parents leave a brighter mark on their personality.
Problems of an only child in a family
Here is a child trying to do something on his own - but help is already on the way, there will always be someone who will save the “little lord” from his troubles. Here is your only one trying to sort things out with a peer on the playground - they would have agreed on their own, but adults are already rushing to help. Often, parents of only children do not allow them to make decisions and realize their intentions - in everything from choosing food and clothing to... independent decision regularly occurring minor problems. But all this helps growing people gain the experience of “standing on their own feet.”
Often, each parent tries to make their only child prodigy, thereby loading the child to the limit. However, overprotection does not allow the development of creativity. On the contrary, taking for granted the care and attention of others, the child can “get stuck” in the illusion that the present is only what the other person guessed and insisted on. In general, “mom knows best what I need.” The result is a socially immature personality, susceptible to all sorts of more or less harmless manipulations.
Practice shows that parents of only children have different attitudes towards the need to set clear boundaries for their children. Some will never learn to say “no” to their only one, or to prevent various childhood “disgraces.” It is easier for an adult to clean up scattered toys after a child or wipe a dirty table, thereby voluntarily and unwittingly maintaining the situation of “avoiding growing up.” As a result, parents of only children often feel overwhelmed by their beloved child as if it were hard work, and feel exhausted and discouraged.
If an only child is surrounded only by adults from birth, kindergarten or he comes to school with low potential social adaptation in a society of peers. And if, moreover, a little man, accustomed to his exclusivity, tries to “build” his peers, bitter disappointment can leave a serious imprint on his future “career.” Children probably instinctively anticipate something like this. Do you think it’s by chance that only children often persistently ask to “buy” them a brother, sister, or dog?.. They often desperately miss the company of equals.
Problems of raising an only child in a family
The life of an only child is not so easy in the current world of stress and emotional stress. They often find themselves involved in the complex relationships of their own parents. As a result, the foundations of serious emotional and psychological trauma are laid. That is why the broad social connections of a one-child family are so important - grandparents, cousins and second cousins, family friends to eliminate problems in raising a child...
It is more difficult for only children to adapt to any changes in the emotional balance in the family. And here they are irreplaceable role-playing games- including the classic "House Game". By the way, with the right approach, boys build their own “family within a family” no less willingly than girls. On the tab for the next issue we will place a set of paper figures - members of a “toy” family for amateur games with a child: “Family at home”, “Birthday”, “Vacation trip”, etc. By playing with your child, you will learn a lot about his ideas about family structure and family interaction.
If a child has some gaming experience, most likely he himself will choose a plot for a “toy” family, will try to realize his plan, create game situations with figures. An adult can become an equal partner of a child - no doubt, he will appreciate it!
What household chores will the members of the “toy” family do? Maybe the toys will go on vacation to the sea or get ready for a birthday? Follow the development of the storyline set by the child, and offer your ideas for the development of the plot exclusively from the role of the game. For example, the family was going to visit, and the child toy, whose role you played, had a fever. The child himself will develop the course of the game in connection with new plot clues. Combine several game plots at once... and play to your health!
